[CloverMac]

My 23 year old son was determined to be bipolar 2 months ago.. I took it ok then but this past Sunday night I had to call the ambulance to take him to the Er and I live 80 miles from him. his wife thinks its a joke but his psychotherapist assured him his meds were safe. now my son is in a psychatric hospital for how knows how long, his wife is divorcing him and I am a big mess I feel like I didnt do enough for him. I also have a downs syndrome daughter so staying strong is getting very hard for me. The new Psychiatrist told us that the meds the old dr gave him were way to strong and he didnt need that many. He had his stomache pumped and he seems to be in good spirits but I on the other hand am not doing well at all! since I live so far away I cant go see him on his visits so I have friends going since his wife refuses to go! Can someone just tell me a way to deal with this so I wont be in a hospital myself??? My kids are my world

[ladyjrnlist]

Therapy for yourself might be a great place to start.

[SoupDragon]

Sounds like your son is in a safe place, so you need to focus on looking after yourself - yes therapy may be a good place to explore how you are feeling.

[dragonfly2]

Is there someone who could care for your daughter so that you could go see him? Perhaps stay in the area overnight so you can see him two days in a row? That's what I did when my daughter was in the phosp - it was about the same distance as in your situation. We were very fortunate that the hospital had rooms that they kept for out-of-the-area family to stay in and I was able to use the cafeteria and eat with my daughter.

It sounds like you have been doing a lot for him. You may have saved his life and you are very involved in his care, despite the distance. I'm sorry to hear that his wife is not handling it well and he is lucky to have you in his corner.

That being said, you do need to take care of yourself as well. Be gentle with yourself and do not be afraid to ask for help for yourself.

[wonder2211]

I know the pain that goes along with seeing someone you love have their life fall apart and you are standing there with your arms tied behind your back unable to do a single thing (I am a similar situation living a state away from my mother who has bipolar adn going through an episode). Having a loved one with bipolar seems like a never ending spiral downward, but it does get better! All you can really do is take it on day at a time. Some days seem like a disastor and you just want it to end but other days are better. Try and cherish those days where your son makes you smile or laugh! The beginning is the worst because you have never dealt with a situation like this before, although you have dealt with some hard ones including a child with Down's syndrome. I know it sounds cliche when people say take care of yourself since that is the last thing on your mind. It is important though becuase your son wouldnt want to lose you!

[Yoda]

I have been in a psych hospital several times and my family seldom visited me. I did talk to them by phone though. He may need quarters for payphones to call or if it is long distance then he needs a phone card. Being in hospital is a good thing because they can try different meds and see how he responds.

[CloverMac]

I call him twice a day! If people wouldnt kick me while I am down things wouldnt be so bad! his wife was so rude to me when I asked if she could get me some of his clothes.. she has already loaded them up in his truck! then My own mother tells me that she wont go take me up there to see him because she has to play dominos Saturday. If I hadnt spent all my money on the gas I already used and buy him a set of clothes and cigarettes I would have gas money now.. It is mothers day Sunday and I have to go even if I have to walk I will get there