Where did that come from????!!!!

I'm quite used to my manias feeling different to normal moods. I pace a lot, feel distractable, and frequently feel a strong dizziness the moment before I act impulsively (Usually that is too late, but at least I see it coming).

Today I got a real fright. I had been manic for 4 days, but the overwhelming drive seemed to be backing off. I was driving carefully when suddenly I put my foot flat around a corner and shot in front of someone. It was like some evil creature took over the car for that moment. I couldn't believe I did that.

When I do stupid things - hurtful things - I feel like a hopeless and worthless case. Depression can slow me down, make everything seem like an impossible effort, but nothing hurts and drives worthlessness as much as real world failure with hard evidence and consequences.

Does impulsiveness come with warning signs for most people, or does it sneak up on you?

Oh, yes, impulsiveness is something that's a warning sign for me, especially reckless driving that I rationalize. You seem to know that was one impulsive act and seems like you have insight into your level of mania. So it may not be the same. The first thing I notice when heading up is sleeplessness. Then irritability. Then a disregard for others. Then reckless driving.

Wow! That is a sobering list! I experience them all, but I hadn't tied them into a hierarchy or progression. Thanks.

My impulsivness usually comes in the form of shopping, antiques and stuff, flea markets (usually, I did buy two flat screen this time), just plain overspending. And it always seems like a good idea, I ever notice any warning signs.

When I was younger and I used to drink, well then there was all kinds of reckless behavior, not just when drinking, but still then I didn't have any warning signs that I could see.

I'm glad you are safe and there was not an accident. That is a scary thing, I don't drive so I don't know if I would be reckless with that or not. I think I'd be reckless as in 20mph kinda person.