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#1
Dec 15, 2005, 05:42 PM
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I haven't posted in about a week, because I am in the deepest, darkest pit imaginable. This is how I feel:
I Am A Rock Simon & Garfunkel A winter's day In a deep and dark December; I am alone, Gazing from my window to the streets below On a freshly fallen silent shroud of snow. I am a rock, I am an island. I've built walls, A fortress deep and mighty, That none may penetrate. I have no need of friendship; friendship causes pain. It's laughter and it's loving I disdain. I am a rock, I am an island. Don't talk of love, But I've heard the words before; It's sleeping in my memory. I won't disturb the slumber of feelings that have died. If I never loved I never would have cried. I am a rock, I am an island. I have my books And my poetry to protect me; I am shielded in my armor, Hiding in my room, safe within my womb. I touch no one and no one touches me. I am a rock, I am an island. And a rock feels no pain; And an island never cries.
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#2
Dec 15, 2005, 06:01 PM
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 I have noticed you have not posted and I miss you...and don't know what to do or say to help you...but do want you to know that I notice when you are gone and care (( MP ))BTW I too can identify with the song
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#3
Dec 15, 2005, 07:03 PM
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(((((((((((JEN))))))))))))) I am sorry your having bad times. Iunderstand this. You dont have to be anyonnes rock here . You can be you and talk to us. Let us know how your feeling. Let us support you. Depression is hard. It sucks. I drains us of life and joy. But know it will get better ok? I promise you that. Let us be here for you ok? Love ya kiddo! Hang in there and talk to us!
Hugz~ Bethy
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#4
Dec 15, 2005, 07:22 PM
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(((Sleeps)))
(((Bethy)))) Thanks to both of you. I appreciate that the both of you are so giving of yourselves when it comes to trying to help. I wish I knew what to tell you to do to help me. But I just don't know. All I know is that I am trying to dig myself up outta this hole. I've got to get away from this blackness that consumes me and my entire life. Something has to change for me. I have to get better somehow. Love both of you. Thanks again... Jenn
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#5
Dec 15, 2005, 07:32 PM
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I wish I had a mental health shovel I would come help you dig...so you could get out of this.....Have you talked to a T ...? I wish I was wise and knew what to do..
safe hugs
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#6
Dec 15, 2005, 07:53 PM
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{{{{ MP }}}}}
Im sorry that you aren't doing well. Be nice to yourself.
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#7
Dec 15, 2005, 08:39 PM
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{{{{{{MP}}}}}}
And in this darkness you're in, you still had the ability and grace to make a new sig for me. *HUGS* hon! Honestly, I'm wondering if it's the weather, the holidays, or what. I'm in that hole with you and even on a non-psych forum, people are saying they are feeling depressed. We're here for ya, hun!   
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#8
Dec 15, 2005, 08:46 PM
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Oh, MP,
If you only knew how many times I have sung that song to myself!!! I hate, hate HATE ,HATE!!...! the pit, when the darkness closes over my soul. I F%^&ING HATE IT!!!!! This time, this time, for the first time in years, I have resolved not to let it destroy me again. Are you with me, MP? Anyone? I know how bad it is, and I don't want me, or any of my friends going there again. Just know we're all thinking of you Jen, doing everything we can to support you! DJ
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Peace, DJ "Maturity is nothing more than a firmer grasp of cause and effect." -Bob "and the angels, and the devils, are playin' tug-o-war with my personality" -Snakedance, The Rainmakers |
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#9
Dec 16, 2005, 09:29 AM
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((((Gem)))))
Thank you so much... 
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#10
Dec 16, 2005, 09:31 AM
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((((Aza))))
Making you the sig was my pleasure.  I didn't mind a bit.And this time of year it seems that a ton of folks are feeling the same way I do. It sucks. Hopefully we'll all get through it soon...
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#11
Dec 16, 2005, 09:33 AM
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(((((DaveyJones)))))
You are an inspiration. Honestly, you are. I am with you. Let's not let this monster win this time.
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#12
Dec 16, 2005, 10:19 AM
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(((((((((((((((((((MP))))))))))))))))))))))))
I know it is a difficult time...I am hear for you. I care. |
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#13
Dec 16, 2005, 12:30 PM
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(((((((((((((((Suz)))))))))))))))
Thank you, friend. I know you are here for me. I'm here for you, too!!
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#14
Dec 16, 2005, 10:13 PM
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((((((((((((((MP))))))))))))))))))))) I wish there was more I could do for you. Please try and take care of yourself. Unfortunately I too know that song all too well. I hope that things look up soon.
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#15
Dec 17, 2005, 06:28 PM
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Thank you,(((((BB))))). I'm hangin' in there, and doing all I can to feel better... I hope you are ok, too.
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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#16
Dec 20, 2005, 10:09 AM
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I'm in with you too, DJ and MP...or....trying to.
To me, depression is like a black, lead blanket that descends and won't let me get up, literally like a magnet that pulls me back into bed. So, yeah... I want out!!!!!! I have a sweet friend who sends emails to me saying "Please tell me what I can do?" Heck, ~I~ don't even know what to do. I just email back and thank her for her kindness and suupport. {{{{{{{MP}}}}}}} and everyone - I hate this illness hitting the sweetest people.  I hope you're feeling at least some better now, my friend
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#17
Dec 20, 2005, 11:14 AM
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has anyone noticed how caring the bipolarbearians are? we tend to covey up like quail when one is hurting. trying to protect that one from the enemy within.
the past week when i had the carbon monoxide poisoning and thought it was the bipolar...i really did want to die. seriously. more than any other time. but it was from the headaches, nausea and tiredness. after they furnace was replaced yesterday, all of that is gone and now i'm back to being bipolarbearian again. please don't get too close to the drain. we're all here, offering a hand up. believe me, we are. this group rocks...when we can. sometimes there's only one dancing, but the others are trying to tap their feet....love you, pat |
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#18
Dec 24, 2005, 12:56 AM
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#19
Dec 27, 2005, 07:21 PM
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I'm so very glad you are ok, Pat.
We bipolarbearians will always stick together, I hope. Sometimes it's the only thing that gets me through.
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"There are things we need to forget and forgive, Sometimes we have to try and shed the damage we don't need." Silverchair- All Across The World |
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