I'm 18, but still feel like a kid

Lately, i've been having this problem in that i feel really stressed out that i am 18 years old--im technically concidered an adult.

I remember, when i was about 8 or 9 years old, and for some reason, i started to feel like i wasn't a kid anymore, even though i wanted to still be a little kid. I remember being 9 and wishing i was still 5. I was not able to enjoy my childhood very much, because i just didn't even feel like a child. But now when i look back, it's real dissapointing that i felt like that at 9 years old, because a nine year old IS a little kid and i wish i had known that.

When i was 16 was when all my problems got worse and i got real psychotic and depressed and was in and out of hospitals. Ever since then, time has gone by real fast and much of the time, i literally don't even believe that i really am 18. I feel as though i am still 16 and that i missed something. That someone has sent me into the future or changed my sense of time just to %#@&#! me off. Lots of my memories since the time i was 16 just feel like a blurr or like a dream and like i was far, far away from myself. I still feel this way, and im sure it's just part of having schizophrenia, but i feel far away and like im in a dream and everything is going too fast.

I really wish i could go back in time and be a kid for a little longer. I still feel like a teenager--like im 16. I missed out and i am not ready to be an adult.

-Becka

Becka, for all intents and purposes you ARE still a kid! You are entitled to have the fun that any 16-18 yrs old wants to have!

I'm 61 and I still act like a kid quite often. When I'm around my grandkids that range from 12 to 3 yrs old, I become like one of them in many ways. Much of my childhood, heck, my whole life up until I married my second husband was stolen from me in one way or the other. When I realized this, I was very bitter about my life's circumstances but the Eternal Kid in me wasn't having any of it. She wanted out to PLAY!

Just the other day, I had my 3 yr old grandson overnight. One of the things we did was "go out in the backyard and 'play' with worms"!! Yep! We did! Lucky I have a bed of worms that make compost for me. LOL When my adopted 11 yr old granddaughter came over, we went shopping and I had just as much fun as if I'd been 11!

You CAN have times of irresponsibility and fun, no matter how old you are. Just gotta make sure it's safe irresponsibility. LOL

Hang in there. You'll make it!

I'm also 18, and you practically took the words out of my mouth! I can totally relate to your post.

whoa!

When I was maybe 8, I remember my mom coming into my room to find me sobbing, listening to my musical jewelry box. She asked me what was wrong, and I said I was sad because I would never be a little girl again. I still have those kinds of feelings. It's a combination of nostalgia and fear, as well as mourning for our fading youth, never to be seen again.

On the flip side, the older I get, the happier I become. But I do understand the grieving feelings.

((((((((((((((Becka))))))))))))))))

I completely understand your feelings. I am here for you. Take care hun.

Love,

Jen

This hits close to home. But the thing to remember is that (and absolutely no offense is intended at all by this) you are still a kid. Hell, I'm 26 and I'm only just now beginning to see how the world really works. Enjoy this time in your life. If you feel 16, then run with it hun. Enjoy it while it lasts. The thing to remember is that you're coming to an age where you're gonna have to begin to work towards your future plans so don't loose sight of that. I guess what I'm trying to say is that, for me, I was happiest when I found a balance between responsibility and irresponsibility. But like I said, enjoy these feelings while you have them. Best of luck to you. 18 is a confusing age.

Ry

Don't forget you are still a teenager and will be next year too, to me all teenagers will always be kids (sorry, but it's how I feel). I was in my twenties when I became grown up...no longer a kid or a teenager. It happens to everyone at a different age and no one knows when. 18 is just an age the government picked to stop being a minor. So, you be a kid as long as you need to be.

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Shadowsinsideme said:

I really wish i could go back in time and be a kid for a little longer. I still feel like a teenager--like im 16. I missed out and i am not ready to be an adult.
-Becka

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Hey Becka,

I'll share my crayons with you! You can be responsible - have a job, pay bills, all that grown-up tedious crap - and still find time to play. My husband & I still watch cartoons, play video games, and I still love to color. Nothing is saying you have to stop playing at a certain age.