My intro I think is in the general section. I've nosed around some of the recent posts and I guess rather than try for hours to find a similar scenario to my own, I will just post and see what happens...I've been diagnosed as Type 2 bi-polar (moderate) for maybe 5 yrs now. I've had very limited success with geodone and abilify, maybe 2-3 wks of feeling like King Kong followed by plateau-ing. Father keeps saying, "Lithium, lithium, lithium" like a mantra. I'm scared to death of it , namely because of it's potential effect on libido. Sex is a major need of mine and i can't stomach any impediment to this. His one good suggestion has been to try baclofen for the attendant alcoholism which I think I'm going to try real soon.
The bi-polarism has truly accelerated since my breakup with a fiancee in 2007. What had been bouts of drinking are now bonafide alcoholism. Still, with my work, where drinking is impossible, I seem to do fine; I'm actually happy much of the time, very highly functioning, high self-esteem, low anxiety most of that time. We're talking several months at a time here.
When I get home, I nosedive into booze, depression; I'm bipolar but it has really just been one low pressure system after another for a few yrs now, with fewer and fewer periods of mania.

Most recently I got home and after one initial bottle of wine (my drink of choice), I cleaned up, started running and working out and got back to the work of finishing the house I've been working on since 2005. Less than three weeks on, I've relapsed...in that time, I had a few drinks with the neighbor but never brought any back to my house. The next day was always fine. Until now. When i start bringing the drink home, I know I'm in for a long low. And I'm aware of it now. Spent a sober night at the folks who live 40 min away and I'm going back home later today to resume work on the house. Trying to work through the paralysis. It's not really despair because i'm not so befunked as to not realize that there's hope out there but it is a kind of inertia from hell. I'm literally stuck watching hrs of Netflix. When previously, I'd been drywalling and doing lots of good hard work on my house, studying languages, running (as I mentioned), making good progress, now it's all at a standstill; I'm in molasses.
I'm still determined to see this through without meds, to work "through" it so i guess I'd like to hear from people who have gone this route, after exhausting the meds route. Are you meditating, how are you able to cope with the tides of depression which wash over you even when you are trying to do everything you can to stave them off? Thanks for your ear(s).

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I'll be honest....I don't think you can "work through" Bipolar without meds. It can be a long road to finding the right med and the right dose, but I would NEVER suggest someone give up. Lithium would be a last resort for me, because of the problems associated with it, however Seroquel does work for me and yes I was on 2 or 3 antipsychotic prior to this med that did not help... You just have to keep trying until you find out what works.

Your alcohol use is an issue I think... meds and alcohol don't mix well. At least alcoholism and Bipolar is a terrible combo. I can have the occasional drink or 2 without any problem but as I said it's ..."occasional".

My mother is an unmedicated Bipolar I AND a full blown binge alcoholic.....trust me get help for yourself, take the meds and stop drinking.

Well, I am stubborn. I string together a few weeks of great productiveness and I hate then to mess with success. You know the thinking, "If I can only keep doing this, and so on." And I have tried a bunch of meds, with very limited success. And I've got the example of my mother who tried every damned med in the book until 20+ yrs on she finally found a cocktail that would help her through the day (and a decent doc to supervise). Not very inspiring precedents. And now, for the last yr and a half, for the first time in my adult life, there's no health insurance. I know it sounds like a bunch of excuses but I was determined to go the non-meds route long before my insurance ran out.

But I am in full agreement with regard to addressing the alcohol problem, which means also addressing the isolating problem, that is, trying to keep my probs from others by staying out of their lives, thereby compounding my own probs. I've been to AA until recently and will try to go back;I have a mixed reaction to its cultishness and overtly Christian overtones (I'm Buddhist).

All of the above may make me sound like a colossal snob but the truth is I'm very open, that's why I'm here. And I'd be very interested still to hear from anyone who has put effort into cognitive work and to listen to a discussion of any techniques which have been beneficial. Thanks to all.