[widgets]

I've know for a long time i have a lot of traits of BPD. But never mentioned it to my SW, PDOC or T.
Today my T told me she thought i was BPD.
Not sure how i feel about this,
i feel BPD is an excuse for being a generally not nice person, no offence meant

[Moose72]

I think my mom's BPD and she can be downright evil on purpose. I read that it has something to do with emotional regulation. But so does bp. At least with bp there are meds. BPD is basically talk therapy and groups - DBT

[sorrel]

The illness called Borderline tends to be an attachment disorder, where intense feelings and emotions, particularly connected with insecurity, can be especially distressing.

And remember, YOU cannot *be* Borderline. You are you. You have symptoms that encompass a certain kind of distress that clinicians have grouped together and called Borderline Personality Disorder. Everyone is different. And even everyone with a diagnosis of BPD is different.

Medication can help ease the worst of the depression and anxiety, but, yes, therapeutic work is the main thing.

And, no one *is* evil, "even" someone with a personality disorder. I/they might have dark thoughts and feelings and struggle to keep them appropriately contained at times, but that doesn't make them evil.

[widgets]

I don't like making speeches

I have BPD and it is an awful mental illness, but I just think of it now as a label, I am me at the end of the day, I haven't killed anyone.

[Flooded]

Originally Posted by widgets

I don't like making speeches

Yet you don't mind making inflammatory, uneducated statements.....

[Moose72]

Sorry but my mom's actions are purposeful and that to me is being mean.

Just like with bp, you may have a disorder but you are responsible for your actions.

[widgets]

No clearly not Flooded.
I'll be honest I don't actually know what you're talking about

How can you not know what flooded is talking about? He's talking about your post about how we all use being bipolar as an excuse to not be good people. It's clearly not an educated thing to say. If you think you might be bp then you need to do some research and not say ignorant things. This is supposed to be a supportive place. There is enough stigma in the world without us having to deal with it here as well.

[Moose72]

Bp or BPD?

[Detach]

I think she meant Borderline Personality Disorder....from her posts I think she was already dx with Bipolar.

[widgets]

Urm I am bipolar.
And I was talking about Borderline personality disorder.
I FEEL LIKE THEY ARE MAKING ME TRY AND FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF BY PUTTING A LABEL ON IT.
I am not saying people with borderline aren't nice; I am saying people who aren't nice get labelled as borderline to make it ok.
If you don't know what I am actually saying why don't you ask instead of making me look stupid!!

i didn't mean to make you look stupid. sorry.

[BNLsMOM]

I think people are getting confused. BP is bipolar. BPD is borderline personality disorder. Both are illnesses. The traits of BPD can sound like the traits of a "mean" person, but I don't think that being mean shows that one has BPD. It is so confusing sometimes. DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy) can be effective for both disorders but was originally targeted for BPD. It is about examining the thoughts and emotions that you have automatically, and learning skills for controllong emotions and being more aware of thoughts so that the person doesn't have an outburst. There is time to think first. DBT also helps with self esteem issues by teaching assertivness rather than agressiveness in getting what you want. I found it helpful. It is hard work and some people do it more than once.

Anyhow BPD is just another disorder that has to be attacked with therapy and hard work.

Originally Posted by widgets

Urm I am bipolar.
And I was talking about Borderline personality disorder.
I FEEL LIKE THEY ARE MAKING ME TRY AND FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF BY PUTTING A LABEL ON IT.
I am not saying people with borderline aren't nice; I am saying people who aren't nice get labelled as borderline to make it ok.
If you don't know what I am actually saying why don't you ask instead of making me look stupid!!

but that is wrong, I have bpd so that makes me not a nice person?

[widgets]

It's ok, I was upset when I wrote it and didn't make myself that clear.
Plus my t actually described it as a 'warped personality,' it's not like bipolar where it's brain chemicals and moods and emotions, I feel like I was being told that I was wrong inside. Of course that's not what she was saying that's how I interpreted it

[Flooded]

Originally Posted by widgets

Urm I am bipolar.
And I was talking about Borderline personality disorder.
I FEEL LIKE THEY ARE MAKING ME TRY AND FEEL BETTER ABOUT MYSELF BY PUTTING A LABEL ON IT.
I am not saying people with borderline aren't nice; I am saying people who aren't nice get labelled as borderline to make it ok.
If you don't know what I am actually saying why don't you ask instead of making me look stupid!!

WE don't MAKE you look anything. You've done a great job of that all by yourself.

[widgets]

Not too aggressive are you?

[Detach]

Originally Posted by Flooded

WE don't MAKE you look anything. You've done a great job of that all by yourself.

Okay, ok....she's upset, not thinking clearly or whatever. She hasn't been feeling well lately...give her a break...please.

[widgets]

I can't deal with this right now.
I tell my T all the bad things I've ever done.... She immediately said BPD.

[Flooded]

Originally Posted by dijmart

Okay, ok....she's upset, not thinking clearly or whatever. She hasn't been feeling well lately...give her a break...please.

She isn't the only one. And doesnt anyone think people with a BPD feel bad enough about themselves already without someone stating they think it's just an excuse to be a mean person?

I guess I proved her theory right

[Moose72]

Oh dear. We are all having a bad month - let's not fight.

[widgets]

It was my therapists excuse for me being horrible, thats how i felt.
Isnt the point of this site that no one is the 'only one,'
Can i ask how long you have been diagnosed Flooded and were you totally happy about it?

When first dx'd with Bipolar i wasnt happy with it.

I wont take back what i said, because i know i wasnt trying to make a sweeping statement about all BPD people, i was just saying how i felt at the time when i was told that was what she thought.

[BNLsMOM]

BPD is how your personality was shaped and has grown in the early years and the coping mechanisms that you developed simply to get by. I don't see it as a flaw because the seeds were planted in early childhood. Whatever nature you were born with plus the coping mechanisms you developed equals BPD.

Widgets, you are not mean, at least from what I have seen on the boards. You have been sensitive and caring.

[widgets]

Thank you.
My T suggested DBT today, i thought it was funny because you said that yesterday and i had never even heard of it before. It sounds quite daunting