[tnlibrarian]

For the past month I've been swinging between feeling like I'm jacked up on something, not being able to concentrate or sleep and being pretty much a ***** to my husband, feeling normal and feeling depressed. I'm having a lot of nights where I go to bed pretty early but lay there awake until 3 or 4 in the morning. Or I wake up 10, 15 times in a night. My mind keeps going a million miles a minute or feels like it's stuck in molasses. Eithier my mouth is going a mile a minute or I just don't want to talk. Other times I'm totally fine. My husband and I knew this could mean that I'm rapid cycling and/or experiencing mixed states. Despite not knowing for sure if our insurance would cover the visit I made an appointment.

Fortunatley, my insurance has been straightened out and my visits will be covered. That's the good news. The bad news is that she told me I am, without question, both rapid cycling and experiencing mixed states. She said that she thinks it started due to lack of sleep. I have a three month old who didn't much more get out of that really new baby stage before he started teething. He sleeps through the night a lot of the time but more and more often he's up until 1, 2, 3 in the morning. I have to be up at 6 to get my oldest off to school. My husband has stayed up with him this past week but, except for one night when I was doped up on Dramamine due to a stomach bug, I didn't sleep worth anything. I either couldn't get to sleep or I kept waking up.

She changed my meds around a bit. I was on 300 mg. Lamictal and 150 mg. slow release Wellbutrin. Today she kept me at 300 mg. Lamictal but changed me to 100 mg. of regular (sudden release) Wellbutrin and added on Ativan. I have to take two 0.5 pills at night and as needed for anxiety. She told me I absolutely must get 6 to 8 hours of sleep each night if I'm to get out of the cycling and mixed states.

I see her in month. She said that if things worsen between now and then or if things have not improved by my next appointment we will have to discuss hospitilization. I desperately do not want to go have to go back to the psych hospital. It's not that it was this horrible place where I was abused. It's just that, well, it's a psych hospital and I don't want to be locked up there away from my husband and kids. It's a hospital period. It's not like people go, "Hey! I want to get admitted to the hospital this weekend! Woot!" Well, some do. But not most people.

I'm telling myself there is every reason to believe that I'll pull out of this once I start sleeping and get started on my meds tonight, especially once I start the Ativan. I'm telling myself that but I'm really scared I'm just kidding myself. My husband has said that he will stay up with the kids all night if he has to if I will just get enough sleep to pull out of this. Let's hope he means that. I feel confident he does but, well, you never know, I guess.

[AniManiac]

I hope the Ativan works for you - I just got an anxiolytic prescribed too, but I'm a little scared to take it since everything I've read suggests that it's just going to put me to sleep.

I know a lot of people take Benadryl to help them sleep. Have you tried that? Dramamine used to reliably knock me out, but not if I'm hypomanic. I find melatonin usually works.

Take your husband up on his offer - marriage is a partnership, full of compromises and sacrifices, and it sounds like you have a supportive spouse, which is really great.

[tnlibrarian]

One night I took one Benadryl. Did nothing. Took two the next night. I slept a little better. I tried melatonin one time a few years back and got so sick off it I've never considered it again! It's strange that Dramamine worked but not Benadryl. Benadryl is actually what Dramamine breaks down into. I asked her about taking Unisom or something like one of the prescription sleep meds but she felt Ativan was a better option. She put me on it in the psych hospital last year and it helped tremendously. Hopefully it will work again.

I am taking my husband up on his offer. He is truly my rock at times like this. If I didn't have him, I don't know who I would lean on for support.

[Beebizzy]

I'm really sorry you're having trouble sleeping and it's driving you into these horrible rapid cycling/mixed states. I really hope it passes soon.

Have you ever tried a classic sleeping pill? I'm on Trazodone (although it's an AD of course) for sleep and it works well.

But anyway your doctor has given you Ativan so definitely go with that. I wouldn't start to question whether it will work or whether you'll pull out of this. It'll stress you. Assume you will. Say to yourself 'yay, I have my Ativan, I'll sleep, and soon this will pass ' - you know? But - easier said than done of course.

Ditto your husband - he'll stay up with the baby if he said he would. So put that out of your mind, and just sit back (or lie down ) and get the sleep you need.

I really hope it improves.

[Beebizzy]

Sorry that first smiley shouldn't be there - argh

[naturalmanic]

First off, I hope you don't ever have to be hospitalized again, I only have ever done it as a last resort, and hate it so much. It's not like you get any real help there.

Ativan acts quick and if that works for you I'm glad, but having been on 4 benzos and benzo dependent for 6 years and I don't recommend long term use. Other sleeping pills have horrible side effects and can really ruin your day. I was told only to add benadryl or dramamine by two of my old psychiatrists if I couldn't sleep at all with my medication at the time. They both also said that it would only work for up to about 3 days in a row and is not a permanent solution. But trying to keep out of the hospital is important, but warm milk and chamolie tea, can help calm you down enough to sleep and intensify the ativan's effect. Sleepy time tea I try not to use to often other wise it doesn't work, and now at Walmart they even have sleepy time tea with a little valerian root which helps me sometimes when my mind won't stop racing. Of course ask your doctor. I use to take valerian root from a health food store for a little while in pill form with little result, but anything to take the edge off sometimes.

As you've been told sleep is the most important thing in Bipolar. My first psychiatrist said he considers bipolar a sleeping disorder and that many symptoms will arise from lack of good sleep alone.

Kudos to your husband and good luck.