[faerie_moon_x]

Hello,

I have a question and want to see what others have to say on it.

Today I got written up at work. Why? Because the temp filling in for me wiped off my desk with Lysol and that was "my job." I have been written up multiple times in the past over things which were directly caused by bipolar. My job knows I have bipolar and although I am supposed to have "accommodations" they never get followed. Accommodations include frequent breaks, ability to take mental health days, contact my doctor, and other things I can't remember.

My second supervisor actually told me to my face (not in the write up) that I'm disgusting. Her exact word. Part of my problem with bipolar is disorganized thinking and disorganization. And that falls to me being cluttered at times, which I try to combat but can't always succeed.

Anyway, so I went up to HR to complain that this write up was BS. The HR lady told me that because I've been written up before, they can write me up for whatever they want. And my complaint is invalid. She agreed that I'm disgusting. And just because I have a disability doesn't mean that I shouldn't be able to perform at the level of someone who doesn't have a disability. In previous write ups they have threatened to fire me, so I am considered a "problem" employee.

I am also pregnant. Due on Jan 9. So I am also combating "pregnancy brain." On Friday my direct supervisor told me if I don't start "focusing" more they will force me to take early maternity leave, which I don't know if they can do that. Doing that will put a lot of financial strain on me, more than already taking regular maternity leave...

My main concern is that I am not under treatment because I can't afford it even with insurance.... due to crappy insurance... So I want to complain to the ADA but I think my complaint may be invalid because I'm not in treatment...

What do you all think?

[roads]

As long as you have a written diagnosis & treatment is denied by your insurance carrier, not being in treatment shouldn't matter.

Are you sure you want to pull down all that much more stress on yourself? Jan 9 is just 3 wks away. Surely you'll have your hands full. Or won't you be up to dealing with baby & ADA both?

Your HR is sounding as if they think they can carry on. Do you have any other write-up besides this last one--which really seems pretty foolish?

[faerie_moon_x]

I think including this one is my fourth write up.

The first I had an episode at work, before I was diagnosed (threatening suicide, etc.) The next was after I was diagnosed and also had to do with generally messiness, forgetting things (like forgetting to put patients in schedule,) and lack of focus. The one after that was the same as the second one. This one was just about cleaning the desk, but I was verbally warned about not focusing. I've had all of these scanned into my medical chart.

My treatment has been patchy because I just can't afford the co-insurance for seeing a pdoc.... So yeah, basically the same problems over and over. Gee, I wonder why

[lad007]

I was so sorry to read your post. Not having a desk cleaned with Lysol is pretty minor. Being called disgusting is down right abusive. You are not being paranoid, that was petty and ridiculous.
I would contact a disability rights organization asap-free help with lawyers and talk to someone who can help. Having a disability means that to perform as those without one is not possible unless we receive help, and it is up to the employer to provide us with assistance. If they have not been following the accommodations they are the ones in trouble, not you.
You are not paranoid, you need someone in your corner.
I contacted the disability rights org in my state, and they are quite powerful and helped me keep my job. Helped me write up accommodations and a new work schedule when I got out of the hospital.
Best of luck, you are not alone. Am sorry for your stress, I know how that feels, and wish you well with the birth.

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by lad007

I was so sorry to read your post. Not having a desk cleaned with Lysol is pretty minor. Being called disgusting is down right abusive. You are not being paranoid, that was petty and ridiculous.
I would contact a disability rights organization asap-free help with lawyers and talk to someone who can help. Having a disability means that to perform as those without one is not possible unless we receive help, and it is up to the employer to provide us with assistance. If they have not been following the accommodations they are the ones in trouble, not you.
You are not paranoid, you need someone in your corner.
I contacted the disability rights org in my state, and they are quite powerful and helped me keep my job. Helped me write up accommodations and a new work schedule when I got out of the hospital.
Best of luck, you are not alone. Am sorry for your stress, I know how that feels, and wish you well with the birth.

Thank you. See, I just need some help. I am under extreme stress and thought I was doing well thanks to all the new and giant projects heaping up on me for weeks.

I don't want all this stress. I need to be laid back. My supervisor is extremely high stress. In all actuality when she is not part of the team (which she wasn't when she went on maternity leave for 12 weeks,) I do amazingly well! I seem to deteriorate in her presence. She is very high stress perfectionist. And when she's around my lesser supervisor follows (the one who calls me disgusting today.)

It was just dust. Not dirty kleenex or globs of food or anything gross....

This whole pregnancy has been high stress and I am to the point where I just don't want that job at all. I feel like being there is toxic, but I am the main bread winner and with the economy afraid of losing my job! But I think I need to work on getting out of there or my health may be at stake.

[dragonfly2]

Unfortunately, it sounds like they're trying to push you out. It is probably time to contact an employment attorney and see what they say about the situation, especially with the pregnancy and early maternity leave threats. It sounds like money is tight right now, but if you check online, many states have legal aid services for people who may not be able to afford an attorney. Many attorneys will also give you a free consult to see if you have a case. It sounds like you do to me, but I am not a legal professional. But you are entitled to your ADA accommodations. They are correct, however, in saying that you are still expected to be able to perform the job at the same level as anyone else, just with the extra accommodations.

But to write you up over cleaning a desk? That spells trouble.

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by dragonfly2

Unfortunately, it sounds like they're trying to push you out. It is probably time to contact an employment attorney and see what they say about the situation, especially with the pregnancy and early maternity leave threats. It sounds like money is tight right now, but if you check online, many states have legal aid services for people who may not be able to afford an attorney. Many attorneys will also give you a free consult to see if you have a case. It sounds like you do to me, but I am not a legal professional. But you are entitled to your ADA accommodations. They are correct, however, in saying that you are still expected to be able to perform the job at the same level as anyone else, just with the extra accommodations.

But to write you up over cleaning a desk? That spells trouble.

Yes, thank you. I have been attempting to perform my job at the normal level knowing that my accommodations are not being allowed. In fact, every day I was turning the phone off 10 minutes before lunch/leaving to ensure things were getting completed at transitions without distractions, and that was part of my review last year that it is "wrong" of me to do that and I can't do it any more.... And ever since then I have struggled.

I fully believe it is there goal to get me out. In fact, in the interview with the temp the questions directly related to seeing if she had "abilities" that I do not have on purpose. Not so much "can you do this job" vs. "can you do it the way she can't."

[roads]

Originally Posted by dark_heart_x

My treatment has been patchy because I just can't afford the co-insurance for seeing a pdoc.... So yeah, basically the same problems over and over. Gee, I wonder why

Somehow you've got to get treatment. I'm not sure how much of a discrimination case you'd have if you're not getting treatment. In my state we pretty much have to take prescribed meds & show up for all pdoc & T appts.

But lad007 offers good advice: Check with your state's disability rights org. I think what you need most are some hard facts. Proving they called you disgusting may be impossible, but the "Lysol lacking" write-up seems awfully close to harassment. Check it out--see what you need to get support.

Take care of you.

[faerie_moon_x]

Yeah, feels like harassment to me... which is why I went to HR and she's totally on their side.... But, she's also a pretty high strung person.

Some people are so triggering. Supervisor sitting in her office screaming "If I have to do do/see/deal with one more ______________ I'm going f***ing kill myself!" (Literally screaming this randomly so we all hear her. And I'm not easily offended, but this offends me. Then HR strutting around "Well, I have OCD this and I have OCD that." Well great, so do millions of people and they don't brag about having an illness, so you must not have it. And so on and so forth... so much drama...

Just try to keep my head down and I let the temp dust the desk and my job is at risk....

[faerie_moon_x]

Also, I keep thinking that, even if nothing can be done for me personally, I wish there was a way to just get them investigated by the ADA so that others don't suffer as I have. Maybe that's weird.

[xp1155]

I would contact the ADA and start (secretly) looking for another job. However, they are seriously covering their butts if they want to get rid of you. In some states, it's still legal to fire someone for whatever reason they please and it's hard to prove discrimination. Regardless, reporting them to the ADA will at least put them on their radar and might keep them in check. You also might try contacting NAMI.

In the end, I think they are being ridiculous and downright discriminatory. Even if you weren't Bipolar, you are pregnant for crying out loud! Of course you need as little stress as possible and your brain might be a little cloudy at times.

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by xp1155

I would contact the ADA and start (secretly) looking for another job. However, they are seriously covering their butts if they want to get rid of you. In some states, it's still legal to fire someone for whatever reason they please and it's hard to prove discrimination. Regardless, reporting them to the ADA will at least put them on their radar and might keep them in check. You also might try contacting NAMI.

In the end, I think they are being ridiculous and downright discriminatory. Even if you weren't Bipolar, you are pregnant for crying out loud! Of course you need as little stress as possible and your brain might be a little cloudy at times.

Oh, yeah, NAMI. I didn't think of them. Thanks! Hmmm... maybe DBSA as well, now that you mention it.

I do think I need a new job. I am going to have time to look. I've been there four years, so I'm not a job hopper at this time like I was as a young adult, thank heavens. It's the economy that scares me, especially with a new baby. But, I know that it is unhealthy to stay there.

I was reading and it says that if you're pregnant they can't force you to stop working if you want to and you're physically capable of it. So I have that as well. I don't think "forced maternity" leave is legal... >.>

But yes, I will look secretly for a job. I need to find something a little lower stress.

[Irreplaceable]

Dark Heart,

It sounds like they are looking for reasons to fire you...What I'm concerned about are these things:

1) A supervisor/manager calling you disgusting is not only unprofessional but very uncalled for and very mean...There is no way in the world I would have tolerated that...

2) Writting you up for not wiping down your desk? Are you serious?

3) HR telling you that since you have been written up before, you can't contest any other times after that when you are written up? I call BS...Something in the milk isn't clean...What about writting up the supervisor that called you disgusting? Even if they have no reasonable grounds to write you up, yet they do (write you up), you're telling me that you can't contest it, you just have to sit there and take it..HA!...Again, you're better than me...

If I were you, I would take this very seriously and I'm not trying to scare you by saying that...Going forward, I would make sure I cross all my T's and dot all my I's...I would document EVERYTHING...Any incident, I would write down the date, time, who you spoke to and what happened...If HR will not help you, then I would consult with a lawyer...These people will try to fire you at the drop of the dime...If they do try to fire you, you need your own documentation to back yourself up should you need it to prove that you were wrongfully fired...

You are better than me...I will tell you that...I'm over here mad enough for you that you were called disgusting...That is uncalled for...I won't even say the way that I would have responded...But that supervisor would no longer be employed if they said it to me...Be smart...Cover yourself..Document document document...And I would consult with a lawyer and explain to them what is going on because it doesn't sound right that your employer is doing you like this knowing your mental illness..And I can't accept that any HR department would tell you what they told you...Good luck...

I've seen things like this at my job...A manager or supervisor wants an employee gone, for whatever reason..They don't like them or whatever the reason is...So they pick on them...Nit pick everything until the time is right to fire the person...And I gotta give it to some employees, they don't take it...Couple of people have cases against the company..Good cases...For being unjustly fired...I've seen this happen time and time again...And they are trying to do it to you...Again, good luck...

[faerie_moon_x]

Originally Posted by Irreplaceable

Dark Heart,

It sounds like they are looking for reasons to fire you...What I'm concerned about are these things:

1) A supervisor/manager calling you disgusting is not only unprofessional but very uncalled for and very mean...There is no way in the world I would have tolerated that...

2) Writting you up for not wiping down your desk? Are you serious?

3) HR telling you that since you have been written up before, you can't contest any other times after that when you are written up? I call BS...Something in the milk isn't clean...What about writting up the supervisor that called you disgusting? Even if they have no reasonable grounds to write you up, yet they do (write you up), you're telling me that you can't contest it, you just have to sit there and take it..HA!...Again, you're better than me...

If I were you, I would take this very seriously and I'm not trying to scare you by saying that...Going forward, I would make sure I cross all my T's and dot all my I's...I would document EVERYTHING...Any incident, I would write down the date, time, who you spoke to and what happened...If HR will not help you, then I would consult with a lawyer...These people will try to fire you at the drop of the dime...If they do try to fire you, you need your own documentation to back yourself up should you need it to prove that you were wrongfully fired...

You are better than me...I will tell you that...I'm over here mad enough for you that you were called disgusting...That is uncalled for...I won't even say the way that I would have responded...But that supervisor would no longer be employed if they said it to me...Be smart...Cover yourself..Document document document...And I would consult with a lawyer and explain to them what is going on because it doesn't sound right that your employer is doing you like this knowing your mental illness..And I can't accept that any HR department would tell you what they told you...Good luck...

I've seen things like this at my job...A manager or supervisor wants an employee gone, for whatever reason..They don't like them or whatever the reason is...So they pick on them...Nit pick everything until the time is right to fire the person...And I gotta give it to some employees, they don't take it...Couple of people have cases against the company..Good cases...For being unjustly fired...I've seen this happen time and time again...And they are trying to do it to you...Again, good luck...

Thank you. I have felt this for years.

I'm not better than you. I'm easily intimidated. I get confused and afraid of people very easily. I freeze up and I don't know how to defend myself. I didn't even know I could dispute a write up until my husband told me I could. I thought you were powerless...

I need to figure this out. My whole life is on edge now. New baby, job in danger, sudden and more upcoming financial troubles, no suitable car (thanks to mine being stolen) or a way to get one... The only think I'm good at is forcing myself not to lay on the floor and give up but at the same time I dont' know how to fight this stuff, either.

[dragonfly2]

Originally Posted by dark_heart_x

I need to figure this out. My whole life is on edge now. New baby, job in danger, sudden and more upcoming financial troubles, no suitable car (thanks to mine being stolen) or a way to get one... The only think I'm good at is forcing myself not to lay on the floor and give up but at the same time I dont' know how to fight this stuff, either.

Call a lawyer. That's what they are there for. They know what your rights are and have the clout to do something about it. This has become about more than your job. This is your health and that of your child we're talking about here. It could just take one letter or phone call to your employer from a lawyer to snap them to attention and realize that you're not taking this lying down.

Please. Just call.

[Irreplaceable]

As for right now, focus on you and your child....Do the best you can at work...The most important thing is to just relax and try not to let this get to you, for the time being...The baby is almost here so I say focus on that and getting prepared for his/her arrival...That is the most important thing....Don't let this stress you...Your baby feels it all...After you have your child and get settled a bit, then I would consult a lawyer, explain everything that has happened and see what your options are...

As far as you defending yourself, you have to get to a point where you stand up for yourself...I see people all the time who are timid and meek, and they get ran over all the time by everyone else...Specifically dominant people...I find that if people know that you will not back down and you will defend yourself when needed, they won't mess with you...Really...It's like the bully mentality when you were in school but now we are dealing with adults...They say and do as they please to those who are timid, but they will think twice before they confront someone who matches their aggressiveness...People at work, if they come at me with attitude or talking rude for no reason, I will either look at them like they are stupid, or in so many words tell them to kick rocks...And I have nooooo problems with them after that point....lol....I just got to a point where I got tired of being quiet and shy because people take advantage of that...

Again, for now I would just focus on finishing up your job to the best of your ability until your maternity leave...After that, consult with a lawyer to see what your options are or if there is anything legally wrong with what they are doing...