[LiteraryLark]

I've had bipolar for over year, but only experienced one episode of mania so I don't know what it means to be bipiolar. And when I was manic, I thought I was Harry Potter so it's not very helpful to me to think "I know for sure I'm manic if I think I'm a wizard". =/

So, what defines mania?

I'm going through different websites and the only thing that's sticking out to me that I'm feeling is "making grand and unattainable plans"

Lately, my thoughts have been very...artistic. I have no job and no money, but I have BIG plans for when I move out because my parents are constantly nagging me to move out. Like big diy, HGTV-like artistic budget-designing for an apartment. I have several boards on pinterest dedicated to my future apartment. I have yet to incorporate roomates. And I am seriously wanting to do this in real life and save up the money to do this.

People always tell me, particularly my parents, that my dreams and plans are too big and that I am being unrealistic. I'm tired of hearing it so I am going to go through with the apartment thing. That is, of course, unless something else pops up that change my mind.

The last thing I was obsessed with was study abroad. I was going to save up my money for that, but I gave up on it because it costs $8k and my parents told me I was being unrealistic.

But when it comes to something realistic, like what career I would like to have, I have no idea what I want to do. I've narrowed it down to medical assistant and teaching. But I keep going back and forth on it.

Are these huge plans that I keep changing part of being bipolar? Is it just part of the artistic minds that come with bipolar? Or is it something else?

[LiteraryLark]

I am also very reckless when it comes to spending money. If I have money, I have the need to spend it right away. I blow all my money on food, which is unnecessary because my parents are in charge of that, and clothes.

[LiteraryLark]

Idk, if it's mania...I want to control it, but I don't want to have to keep "setting unrealstic goals". I have never fit into society's mold, I have always been the black sheep in my family and at school. I want to be eccentric and live the creative side of the eccentric lifestyle. I don't want to fit in a box...I see life in a different view and I want to portray that view.

idk how to do that without having to keep questioning my "sanity" or have other people question me....

[bipolarmedstudent]

Do you eat the food you buy? What kind of food do you buy?

When I'm manic, I buy things I never use, and I'll buy multiples of the same thing. Like 7 ereaders, 13 sets of bedsheets, $1000 of cocaine, etc. But I never use it.

[LiteraryLark]

Yeah I eat the food I buy. I buy fastfood whenever I am out, but it's not necessary.

[LiteraryLark]

I've had a fairly normal life before and after the dx.
I was depressed all my life, went on zoloft, had the episode, now on lithium and zyprexa, back to normal without the depression.

[bipolarmedstudent]

Originally Posted by DrSkipper

Yeah I eat the food I buy. I buy fastfood whenever I am out, but it's not necessary.

Then I wouldn't call that manic spending. Just, um, over-indulgent spending. Manic spending is like....just this PRESSURE to buy things. It's insane. I would go from store to store to store buying random crap and I couldn't stop. I would keep buying the same thing over and over again, so I had multiples of everything.

[Forgive77]

Sounds like you may be a little manic at the moment. Lots of ideas. =) Pick one thing and go for it!

[LiteraryLark]

It's definitely controllable...nothing to change meds about...I think it may be stress-induced. I think once I get a job and go back to school I will be feeling much better.

[bipolarmedstudent]

Originally Posted by DrSkipper

It's definitely controllable...nothing to change meds about...I think it may be stress-induced. I think once I get a job and go back to school I will be feeling much better.

I agree with this. I always feel much better when I have the structure of school/a job. In fact, it's so important that my psychiatrist says I should ALWAYS have that structure, and never take time off from school/work.

[Anneinside]

If making big plans is something you "always" do as your parents stated then it is not a symptom of mania. If you were out charging things to further your plans for an apartment or signing a lease you can't pay for and you HAVE to do it then it's mania. If it is something you want and you are willing to work toward it then it isn't mania. In mania you want it NOW no matter what you have to do.

[bipolarmedstudent]

Originally Posted by Anneinside

If making big plans is something you "always" do as your parents stated then it is not a symptom of mania. If you were out charging things to further your plans for an apartment or signing a lease you can't pay for and you HAVE to do it then it's mania. If it is something you want and you are willing to work toward it then it isn't mania. In mania you want it NOW no matter what you have to do.

Yes, this! I once drove 2 hours to get a few coupons from somebody. I charged up my credit cards for thousands of dollars. It was frenzied and abnormal, and I even knew it was excessive and out-of-character while I was doing it, but I couldn't stop it.

[LiteraryLark]

That's why I don't think I have bipolar. I had ONE episode where I thought I was Harry Potter. A month before that, I started taking an antidepressant...

My grandmother is bipolar, so I may be bipolar, but aside from that one episode I have never had any lack of control over myself. I've always been in control and the only thing I have ever experienced was depression. Nothing super abnormal about me.

[cocoabeans]

The worst thing you can do for yourself is start to label your happiness, imagination or ideas as manic. Hypomania is happiness for normal people. Them doctors just had to call it something else in the context of a disorder. Same goes for your depressive feelings. Eventually, you will learn some definite signs, like things that you find yourself doing or experiencing only during a mood episode. (Like for me, posting here! I only participate in these types of forums when I'm not quite right.)

Being happy, spending a bit too much money (not the examples given) having plans to study abroad etc is good! Enjoy it.

Feeling sad, unhappy, lonely and even hopeless at times, part of the human experience, accept it.

Not everything you experience emotionally is your bipolar (if you have it) or that your ideas are unrealistic, so what if they are? You're not going to get anywhere wondering if it is mania or depression all day. That's a trap. A trap I tell you!

[LiteraryLark]

^^^Exactly why I don't think I am bipolar. I have NEVER experienced any type of bipolar symptoms UNTIL I started using antidepressants. A month later, I landed in the hospital.

Sure, I'm taking meds to recover, but I really don't think there is anything wrong with me.

That's it, I'm gonna go email my doctor...I am gonna ask him to reevaluate me either now or once I'm off my meds...

[larakeziah]

Doesn't taking antidepressants alone cause mania in ppl with bipolar?? Just a thought so u still my have BP.

[ADDithers]

I've bit off more than I can chew all my life - so many dreams were unrealistic. I did reach some of them, but something happened along the way & I'm just on the sideline - not really afraid, but no passion to take any more chances.

I say your folks want you to set goals they think you can reach based upon what you have already showed them you can do. That's not unreasonable. That is what parents are for.

Larakeziah; some "neurotypical" people can get medication induced mania, even without Bipolar. It's not totally common, but it's been known to happen.

[Trippin2.0]

^^^Yes it's true. I've heard of a few getting AD induced mania and not being bp at all. So DS. You may be right about your dx, speaking to your doc is a great idea. Nobody should be on heavy duty meds if they're not needed.

Yes DS, you don't want to have a Bipolar label follow you around if this was a one time deal. I have read a lot about AD's making non bipolars manic. In fact the warning on the side effect pamphlet is not just their for Bipolars alone.

I don't know how long your pdoc would want to wait to reevaluate you to be on the safe side. But I would insist on it. The heavy drugs if you don't need them , nope. Also just your medical record and dealing with insurance, not an american so I don't know if that makes a difference insurance wise.

[DaveyJones]

Hey, DS,

It only takes ONE manic episode to diagnose bipolar I. Sleeplessness, delusions of grandeur, reckless behavior (sex, money), feeling like you can do ANYTHING!!!! These symptoms last at least a week (according to DSM-IV). Look up DSM-IV, you can check out the criteria for yourself. Shorter duration or less intense is usually hypomania. That will usually lead to a BP -II diagnosis. Becoming manic/hypomanic after an antidepressant is a classic symptom.

Keep a mood chart, see your pdoc. Good wishes!

[Tsunamisurfer]

Originally Posted by Anika

..I have read a lot about AD's making non bipolars manic. In fact the warning on the side effect pamphlet is not just their for Bipolars alone.

I don't know how long your pdoc would want to wait to reevaluate you to be on the safe side. But I would insist on it. The heavy drugs if you don't need them , nope. ...

Very valid points. Be cautious if you do come off meds. They can have a lasting impact on your neurology, and you may not simply revert to the way you were before the antidepressant induced manic episode.

[Trippin2.0]

Originally Posted by DaveyJones

Hey, DS,

It only takes ONE manic episode to diagnose bipolar I. Sleeplessness, delusions of grandeur, reckless behavior (sex, money), feeling like you can do ANYTHING!!!! These symptoms last at least a week (according to DSM-IV). Look up DSM-IV, you can check out the criteria for yourself. Shorter duration or less intense is usually hypomania. That will usually lead to a BP -II diagnosis. Becoming manic/hypomanic after an antidepressant is a classic symptom.

Keep a mood chart, see your pdoc. Good wishes!

Look up bp3. It refers to what we are talking about. I'm sure that if DS' dx was accurate she'd have more symptoms than 1 AD induced mania over such a long period.
Just my 2c

[LiteraryLark]

Trippin: The meds are very effective and they are useful in helping me recover from the manic episode because they are used to control manic symptoms. I think even if I am not bipolar, the meds are easing my mind away from the episode and my episode was so bad it is taking so long to recover. It's not like getting hungover: I can't just bounce back from an episode and be okay. Bipolar or not, it is a mind-altering/life-changing event and I have to do everything I can to go back to normal.

Anika: I agree with you and I think that an option may be is to reevaluate me when I am fully off the meds. I think that if I cannot be tested now, a month or two off the meds will be the only sure way of knowing if it was AD-induced or not. Because yes, these drugs are heavy duty, however, I cannot simply jump right off of them because I feel normal. My friends and family have warned me that many people with bipolar will feel like they don't need the meds and then jump off their meds and have another episode. I sent my doctor a message last night so hopefully sometime today he will email me back. He is a good doctor and replies within a day or two.

Tsunamisurfer: I do realize that and it is something my doc and I will talk about. I don't intend to jump off them at all; since I have been on the meds I have been working really hard to slowly ease off them. I am just hoping I can be reevaluated to see if it was AD-induced or not. I think the meds have made me better than when I wasn't on them. I was depressed all my life until I took the AD.

[Trippin2.0]

I read somewhere that Wellbutrin has a good rep for N0T inducing mania in non-bp patients. Not sure how true that is, they might just be 'pushing' the drug, but thought I'd mention it incase your pdoc does re-dx you in future. It might be worth looking into to combat the depression.
Just a thought. Goodluck to you.