Feeling Sui - feeling trapped- feeling unloved

I told my mom that I am planning on fimishing my degree and her response was very negative. Then she wants me out NOW.

Then I tell my supposedly good friend and she sides with them and said I go to per to run away! Way to trivialize suicide. She said some other stuff - like my going to per was their fault- but she seemed sarcastic. Said I go to per to run away.

I will be gone. Last tv show. Last time I went to the grocery store. Should buy something really expenses. **** bills.

Friends are as apathetic as can be.

I have tried many times to move out but it's nearly impossible. I thought this plan would work but rather than support me they dismiss my ideas out of hand. So with that way I have no plan since mine is not fast enough.

I want to *******

We all know that you don't go to the per to "run away". You go because you need help (and tonight seems like a good time to go). Your friend can't understand because she is (likely) mentally healthy, and neurotypicals just don't get us. But we understand you.

Please don't hurt yourself. If you feel like you might, then go to the per and if they suggest that you should be admitted then go inpatient. Just stay safe. You're a valued member of this community, and all of us would be sad if you left and never returned.

Pdoc says to go when I need to and ignore the evil ones (meaning some people I live with) but they will freak out because I left my kids with them. Yet pdoc says not to worry about that.

I think that your pdoc is right. Your kids need you to be alive. The people you live with will just have to take care of them for a little while, until you are healthy enough to be discharged.

Yet they don't care once but if I'm ok. So they'll just complain about watching my kids.

I don't even know what I'm typing.

Who cares if they complain? This is your life! You have an illness that is threatening to kill you; this is not your fault at all. You know that, so don't let their disapproval get to you. Please go to the psych er. I'm really worried about you.

Maybe I'll wait until they're in bed. Not fair to the kids though.

Ok. I'm wearing my pajamas but a bra too. Here goes a long night....

Glad you're going in! Take care.

I'll be back after. Whenever that may be.

((((((Moose)))))) Please stay safe.

You're really brave, take care and see you soon.

Thinking of you.... hope you are ok...

I'm back. That was relatively quick.

They were so nice. Helped me to see that my mom has issues and not necessarily me. They said I'm doing a great job dealing with this.

Glad that they helped you. Hope things improve soon for you

At the moment they are leaving me completely alone and I'm watch tv. :-)