[mel80]

I recently came across my college photos from quite few years ago but am unable to understand that the person looking back at me from those pics is me.I find this incredibly frustrating and disturbing that I can not accept that its me in the pics.What is up with that ?So I was just wondering if anybody else has experienced this sort of thing ?I wonder if the meds over the years have destroyed some part of my memory ?

[kindachaotic]

I remember who I was at the time. Even before meds have 2&3 year spans of time that are gone. In last 10-12yrs feel more brain fried on meds & also have no idea if any of it will ever return...

[ManicDad]

I remember the person I was but it's hard for me to connect b/c it seems like a lifetime ago. The person in those pics isn't me anymore.

[moremi]

Originally Posted by mel80

I recently came across my college photos from quite few years ago but am unable to understand that the person looking back at me from those pics is me.I find this incredibly frustrating and disturbing that I can not accept that its me in the pics.What is up with that ?So I was just wondering if anybody else has experienced this sort of thing ?I wonder if the meds over the years have destroyed some part of my memory ?

I know exactly what you mean. I have lost so much memory over the past couple of years. I believe its from meds because I never had this problem before being on meds the past few years. I have lost a lot of my memories over my life in just the past couple of years. Not sure if its from mania causing brain damage or the medications. Sometimes I start to remember things but this has just been recently. Its like I have been robbed of some of the best moments of my life. i hate it.... I look at the pictures but I dont remember being there. I dont remember what was going on or why we look the way we do or why our facial expressions are like they are. It drives me insane that I cant remember stuff. It makes me cry a lot

[Travelinglady]

I do recognize myself--alas much skinnier. I am one of those people who never changed much over the years. I still basically have a pug nose, for example, like a kid.

I also have terrible memory problems, and I could cry my eyes out about it. I have fibromylagia, which is said to affect memory, and have taken tons of different drugs, but haven't had any shock treatments. But I can't tell you the name of the book I just finished reading yesterday....Sigh.

[insideout]

I think maybe it's not your memory going bad. It sounds like something that I also experience. I believe it's called depersonalization.

[moremi]

Originally Posted by insideout

I think maybe it's not your memory going bad. It sounds like something that I also experience. I believe it's called depersonalization.

What happens when you get this?

[insideout]

Originally Posted by moremi

What happens when you get this?

I feel like I'm not real... I don't recognize myself in the mirror, and sometimes the world is in slow motion.

[insideout]

Originally Posted by moremi

I know exactly what you mean. I have lost so much memory over the past couple of years. I believe its from meds because I never had this problem before being on meds the past few years. I have lost a lot of my memories over my life in just the past couple of years. Not sure if its from mania causing brain damage or the medications. Sometimes I start to remember things but this has just been recently. Its like I have been robbed of some of the best moments of my life. i hate it.... I look at the pictures but I dont remember being there. I dont remember what was going on or why we look the way we do or why our facial expressions are like they are. It drives me insane that I cant remember stuff. It makes me cry a lot

The memories do come back, and when they do, it's joyous!

[moremi]

Originally Posted by insideout

The memories do come back, and when they do, it's joyous!

Oh thats wonderful news. I have lost a lot and have regained some but nowhere near all my memories. I lost memorie from my past as well from all the way back when i was a tenager. I have lost mostly recent time though. A whole year of my life is pretty foggy, the year before last. Its really weird, i gues it was from meds or mania not sure which.

[insideout]

Originally Posted by moremi

Oh thats wonderful news. I have lost a lot and have regained some but nowhere near all my memories. I lost memorie from my past as well from all the way back when i was a tenager. I have lost mostly recent time though. A whole year of my life is pretty foggy, the year before last. Its really weird, i gues it was from meds or mania not sure which.

I also cannot recall much from these recent years past. I believe it is due to my brain simply not laying as much down to memory these days. So much brain power is used to maintain a certain level of sanity, that there is not enough energy left to worry about recording everything as it happens.