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Old Aug 24, 2012, 04:45 PM
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faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
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So, I always wanted to be a writer. Actually, I always wanted to be a novelist of sci-fi/fantasy. I did "complete" one rough draft of a novel that is over 150,000 words, far too long for it's genre and needing a complete overhaul. And then I have a lot of little chunks of work lying around. My favorite is a 12 chapter piece that I hope to complete someday. My problem is I get inspiration but I can't get ahold of my thoughts. My ideas blow around so fast in my brain that I can't make sense of them. It isn't writer's block, it's more like writer's tsunami, or maybe writer's hurricane.

Well, I'm feeling that old familiar urge. I'm getting the little sparks of ideas that blow past me and I just want to hold onto them long enough to make sense of out them. At the same time, I think it's a sign I'm going more manic again. I've been pretty depressed for a few weeks.

I am frustrated.
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  #2  
Old Aug 24, 2012, 05:48 PM
Anonymous32896
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take advantage of it. If it's mania coming on, make the best of it and go for your dream of writing. You can do it!
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  #3  
Old Aug 26, 2012, 08:18 PM
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I'm a freelance writer and blogger. Sometimes I go months without being able to cobble together even a decent grocery list, let alone an article or blog post. Then my Muse will take a dump on my head and suddenly I'm eloquent and mellifluous with my prose.....to say nothing of verbosity. Sometime I'll share with you all an essay I wrote a few months ago called "After the Whirlwind", when I was manic as hell (hence the overuse of metaphors). I got paid for it too.
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  #4  
Old Aug 26, 2012, 08:30 PM
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BipolaRNurse BipolaRNurse is offline
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OK, I posted the piece in the Creative Corner for anyone who's interested.
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DX: Bipolar 1
Anxiety
Tardive dyskinesia
Mild cognitive impairment

RX:
Celexa 20 mg
Gabapentin 1200 mg
Geodon 40 mg AM, 60 mg PM
Klonopin 0.5 mg PRN
Lamictal 500 mg
Levothyroxine 125 mcg (rx'd for depression)
Trazodone 150 mg
Zyprexa 7.5 mg

Please come visit me @ http://bpnurse.com
Thanks for this!
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  #5  
Old Aug 26, 2012, 08:36 PM
Anonymous32507
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Imma go look Bipolarnurse!

Darkheart, I am like that with art, which I think is like writing. I've had painters tsunami for a few years straight. I like phrase .

I hope you are not in for mania, even if it does spark some writing, just because Of the downfalls. I wish it could be just the positive aspects of mania all the time. I completely understand tho, I get those ideas that blow past me too quickly as well, even jotting them down quickly doesn't seem to help much, as I can never capture in notes what my entire vision is.
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  #6  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 01:59 AM
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I find a lot of healing by writing what's going on in my head. It's only a few paragraphs, but I believe it gives me a different perspective
  #7  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 08:50 AM
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Where's the creative corner?
  #8  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 09:33 AM
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faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
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Thanks everyone.

I used to write like I breath. I think I was manic at the time but I don't know. I would write for 8-9 hours straight in an almost trance-like state. It was to the point where I wouldn't even know what I had written until I stopped and re-read it. But, it was always my best writing. I once read how sometimes you function on different brain waves (like when you drive home but then don't remember doing it,) and that the best creative mind state was in the "alpha" brain wave state. So, I used to think that was what was happening to me.

That happens very rarely now, the last time was in 2008-2009. I was writing the novel I hoped to polish and get ready to send out (the one I have 12 chapters of,) and also writing a web comic. Then this problem started and I haven't been able to write like that. I try. I get bits and pieces. Then I get really frustrated and I just can't take it.
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  #9  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 07:42 PM
EverythingNothing EverythingNothing is offline
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I know what you mean. Being able to sit down and then write something I'm ok with seems to come and go. I do like writing but the majority of the time I don't. It's a strange feeling. I've found that forcing myself to write anything at all on a regular basis helps but actually feeling the writing still comes and goes.

It's certainly nice when things come together.
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  #10  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 08:11 PM
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I've always had an urge to write also. I even own a blog page that redirects to wordpress. However I have not felt the urge in quite some time to do any writing. It's like I know I want to right about the trucking industry something I really enjoy. Something I did for nearly 1.5 years before my health took a dive. I just have so many thoughts that its hard to figure out where to start or what to start from or who to start with. Maybe soon I will start figuring out the pages.
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  #11  
Old Aug 27, 2012, 08:19 PM
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Take advantage of the urge to write!

I'm active in a regional nonprofit group for writers, and I really want to encourage you to find a similar group in your area.

Especially a group that has a critique group. That's vital to all writers. Writing is such a solitary act, and you need feedback from other writers. Not feedback from a spouse, parent, good friend -- unless that person happens to be a writer. You need writers to point out what's good and what needs a little more work, and you need to do this before you send it to an editor or agent.
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  #12  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 09:51 AM
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faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by purpledaisy View Post
Take advantage of the urge to write!

I'm active in a regional nonprofit group for writers, and I really want to encourage you to find a similar group in your area.

Especially a group that has a critique group. That's vital to all writers. Writing is such a solitary act, and you need feedback from other writers. Not feedback from a spouse, parent, good friend -- unless that person happens to be a writer. You need writers to point out what's good and what needs a little more work, and you need to do this before you send it to an editor or agent.
I've never heard of this before. I used to belong to a web site... that I can't remember the name of... Anyway, it was full of writers and you would write and post and then based on something they would choose so many a month to be sent to an editor or agent or something. That's when I did my last 12 chapters of writing. It was great to get feedback and from people who don't know me at all and so won't sugar coat things.

Well, then they changed the format and how things worked and it was stupid, so I lost interest. But then I found authonomy.com which is owned by Harper Collins and it's similar and people can read your work and comment and then based on votes every month they choose 5 works to publish. I re-joined the site a few months ago but can't get anything together to post...

I've learned that no one you know, not spouse, friend, or family member, will ever read what you've written. They just don't care. I started a blog sort of, except I was trying to make each post a chapter. I would upload the link to Facebook each time I put up a new chapter. My family, who always go on about what a great writer I was and how I should have worked harder to get published, didn't even bother to view it. Didn't even both to push "like" when I would say "I'm trying to get back into writing." And of course that's not the first time that has happened.

So, I took the whole thing down when I was depressed.
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  #13  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 10:33 AM
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purpledaisy purpledaisy is offline
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That's a shame that family and friends didn't show more interest. I've been there. I was writing for regional publications and family members STILL wouldn't read what I wrote. Later on, they would mention a certain topic or personality in the area and I'd say, "Yes, I wrote about that in the (month) issue of (publication's name). You would have known that if you had read it."

Bottom line is if you love to write, write. Write for yourself. Your family isn't your audience. Your audience is out there, waiting for you to make your work available for them to read.

The bipolar blog that I've started is something that I would NEVER share with my family or friends, by the way. I'd rather write about what I'm going through without a face or name.

I'll find an audience, though, because there are so many of us out there.
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Bipolar II * Rapid-Cycling

46. Female. Midwest USA. Just returned to treatment in July 2012 after being out of treatment since 1994. First diagnosed at age 21.

Writer stuck in a cubicle by day.
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  #14  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 11:22 AM
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faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by purpledaisy View Post
That's a shame that family and friends didn't show more interest. I've been there. I was writing for regional publications and family members STILL wouldn't read what I wrote. Later on, they would mention a certain topic or personality in the area and I'd say, "Yes, I wrote about that in the (month) issue of (publication's name). You would have known that if you had read it."

Bottom line is if you love to write, write. Write for yourself. Your family isn't your audience. Your audience is out there, waiting for you to make your work available for them to read.

The bipolar blog that I've started is something that I would NEVER share with my family or friends, by the way. I'd rather write about what I'm going through without a face or name.

I'll find an audience, though, because there are so many of us out there.
Yeah, I know. Family is not the real audiance. At the time I was going through some other problems, so I was pretty depressed and having a lot of mixed state issues... which are common for me sadly. So, it's pretty easy for me to get upset and do things like take down my blog and just shut down.
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  #15  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 11:44 AM
Anonymous32912
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...writing is an ancient art, marvelous full of wonder words are immaculate and can be positioned in such a way to illuminate our thoughts bring to light the darkest mysteries within....colour us

The urge to write...

they can also be stupid rude and ridiculous....amusing amazing random poetic and disastrous but to who?

The urge to write...

...it's in the cave-paint the chisel the charcoal the pencil the pen the keyboard of the artist.
The urge to write...

I'm sure we are not the first 'manic' predisposed humans ever to breath the air on this planet!

The urge to write...

...and that in itself is amazing....the bipolars before us had no meds no p'docs no nuthin...and I'm talkin' way back and we are likely breathing in the same air in some weird way that they breathed out.

it's now our turn to record our experiences!

awesome topic
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  #16  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 12:44 PM
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faerie_moon_x faerie_moon_x is offline
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Thanks, doublemonkey!

Well, I'm like the bipolars before. No meds, no pdoc, no nothing. I live at the whim and whirl of this tornado in my head.
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  #17  
Old Aug 28, 2012, 01:01 PM
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Originally Posted by dark_heart_x View Post
Thanks, doublemonkey!

Well, I'm like the bipolars before. No meds, no pdoc, no nothing. I live at the whim and whirl of this tornado in my head.
..magic!
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