[wolfie205]

I'm really sorry if this sounds like a rant. I have not got a definitive diagnosis for bipolar as they want to monitor my moods for 6 months but its the most likely candidate right now. Mental illness is fairly new to me. The only people I know who suffer from mental illness had either depression or anxiety and even then, they were seen as being weak, emotionally unstable and insecure. I understand that with bipolar, my moods and emotions change a lot, but I honestly find it hard to believe that anyone with any kind of mental illness is weak. I've been struggling with mental health issues for slightly less than a year and I swear it has not been easy. It takes a lot of strength to not just reach for help but to even keep going on. The periods where I feel fine and really happy are like the best times in my life, but the periods where the paranoia comes in and totally ruins my life are like having to relive a nightmare over and over again. The kind of fear that I have to deal with in episodes like this is so overwhelming, it takes a lot to try and overcome it. The paranoid thoughts feel so real that I get really depressed and think people are all out to get me. Having to struggle to face your fears on a daily basis is not an easy task. I am not on meds right now although it was highly recommended I see a psychiatrist. I am only experiencing the early stages of Bipolar and already I admire all those who have been battling mental illness for years and years now, whether they are on meds or not. The fact that we have continued to struggle makes me wonder why people see us as weak? Maybe emotionally unstable, but I honestly don't think I'm that weak or insecure. Is there really anything wrong with being bipolar, or having some other kind of mental illness? Why do people keep looking down on me and making me seem like I'm just never going to be as good as them? And no I am not insecure, just tired of people belittling me and telling me I'm not good enough. Even when I worked really hard to do well in college, it doesn't matter because there's something wrong with me and I'm never going to be as good as everybody else. Why is that so? Why can't people with bipolar do the same things "normal" people do? Why can't I have dreams or ambitions without being laughed at? I don't want to sound like I'm complaining or whining here. The community on pc have been really supportive and nonjudgmental. The only people who have been so supportive and have never made me feel like I'm some kind of messed up person for having mental health issues. I just am tired of people making fun of me. Is there really anything wrong with mental illness?

"is their anything wrong with mental illness?"

nope..

it's people that have issues

they look at us and think oh we can't work, we're lazy, we're not in control of our actions, and just spend their time stigmitizing us

but if they looked a little closer.... they would find we're just as able as anyone else.

we're not everything people like to say we are- some people even like looking at it as some kind of physical disability which is wrong

[manymiles]

I think sometimes folks cling to the idea that we are weak so that they can justify their own actions. If they define it as inherent weakness then they could tell themselves it's OK to not help, not support or to turn and walk away. If they took the time to see that it is not weakness then perhaps they'd feel some guilt for their inactions/actions.

Lately I've been thinking about this idea of being good enough and ill. I think it's a social construct. Goodness and normal is defined a lot of the time as what most do and what could benefit society as we know it. Really these can be false things. If we somehow lived in a society which supported more fluid work schedules, time off or supported seasons of rest then who would be good or normal then?

If more folks knew how challenging it is to do things when you have so much less energy than others, then perhaps they'd have more respect for me/us.

[tintie]

To quote manymiles "it is a social construct". And this construct is even more difficult without financial means. I was finally diagnosed at 54 yrs. and it took a lot of medication and one smart doctor to stabilize me ( always considered highly functional). Stay in college ,read everything on Bipolar ,seek strategies that will work for you and don't apologize. Also, for me my episodes seemed to get worse as I aged but that's me I was not on any kind of meds till I reached 54 and was homeless. No financial means!

[EternalWinter]

Most people in general have to look down on somebody, weather its another race, the poor, mentally ill etc... To feel better about them selves. So they can think to themselves "I did all this and they couldnt do it" "Im more strong willed and better then them" "just look at those people" Very black and white thinking.

I wish this was just a few people but no its a majority. I get treated differently for not always dressing properly, or being totally out of the ordinary. But I do it intentionally. I like it when people judge me so I can be more up front about it.

I have had places tell me there not taking resumes any time soon, when I seen a lady right after me turn one in and get an application. I went back the next day and spoke to the manager about it and he was very understanding and apologetic, so im sure her way of treating me got her in a little bit of trouble. Though Im sure this one was a little more race related. Its the same concept when we have an illness at no fault of our own.

I have seen the judgement of society just by little things. I have not told anyone I am bipolar that I know personally because of it.

[sassymck]

You are right. It takes a great deal of fortitude to cope with mental illness. I don't have paranoia myself, but I have dealt with it enough to be able to empathize. It takes a lot of guts to live with that day in and day out--great strength. It is the people who look down on you that are weak and small--not you!!! It takes a very big person to reach out for help and battle against mental illness on a day to day basis. I applaud you. All the best. Take care now.

Some do, Wolfie, but most well-educated and mature people don't (in my experience).

One reason some may see us as weak, Wolfie, is that we might have an overly severe conscience which inhibits our reacting to situations in a negative way that someone who has less conscience would respond to very strongly. The balance of moods may be difficult because of that.

I once had to lash out at a defense attorney in a lawsuit in which I was the victim
and my insurance company (who covered all the expenses, etc., on my uninsured
motorist coverage) sued the young, uninsured driver to recover over $63,000. they paid for
my hospitalization and surgery and recovery. I almost fainted after I left the courtroom from the stress of having to discipline the attorney so strongly. So for those of us who have a very strong conscience, we might appear to be weak to others.

Then, too, we have to recognize that bipolar patients, particularly those who are
intellectually gifted are often born with extreme sensitivity to almost everything and
everybody. (You should read Pearl Buck's description of the artist for a clear understanding of what sensitivity is.)

Those are two reasons some in the general public might think of us as weak.

Life's experiences will make us strong in the long run if we can weather the
"thousand slings and arrows" that life throws at us--in Shakespeare's words.

If you just remember that you were created by God and God doesn't make mistakes,
you'll be feeling better.

In addition, please remember that when people talk they are talking about themselves.
That helps us to understand who is weak and who isn't.

Real strength requires gentleness; some don't know or understand that. If you are
a gentle person, chances are you are very strong or will be as you live with that
trait dominant in your character.

Finally, anything violent never lasts; it's the ultimate in weakness. Strength is calm, often
quiet, and very alert and attentive,as well as protective.

[middlepath]

Sometimes people just fear what they don't understand. It is possible that the masses are not aware of the many talents and gifts BP people possess! I hope that those who lack understanding seek understanding. High hopes, i know.

Pat yourself on the back (and others) who fight this fight daily. We ARE unique and amazing in our own ways. (((hugs)))

[redbandit]

I know what you mean. I often wish if I have to have any illness, why cant it be a so-called normal one? I mean some obvious disability, like being blind or in a wheelchair. That probably sounds really bad, but I just cant stand being bipolar. I feel shut off from the world rite now and dont want my friends to know bcuz im afraid they wouldnt want to hang out with me anymore.

Imo, it's just out of pure ignorance. One of my sister's looks down on me bc I'm bp. Me as well as my whole family even hesitated on telling her. I finally did and I can tell she thinks of me differently. She's just ignorant. Ppl that are educated imo don't look down on us. Just my 2 cents.

[faerie_moon_x]

This is what I think about this topic:

People think we're using our emotions as an excuse to get out of working. It's that simple.

"I'm depressed and can't get out of bed" to them sounds like "I'm too lazy to get out of bed."

"I am crashing after mania and giving up on my 10,000 projects" sounds like "I'm unreliable and break my word."

They simply believe we are quitters, whinners, and manipulators. They believe that, just like them, we have full control over what's happening in our heads. They think they we are doing it on purpose and taking advantage of them. They think we're weak because we just refuse to do what everyone else is doing and deal with it like everyone else.

This is stigma in it's purest form.

I firmly believe that people who feel this way, if suddenly struck by mental illness, would be the ones who lay down on the floor and not get up. Because they have no idea the sheer force and power of what we struggle with everyday.

Also, there are a lot of people who think that asking for help is a sign of weakness.

Just ignore these people. They are not worth your energy.

[ultramar]

Why do people keep looking down on me and making me seem like I'm just never going to be as good as them? And no I am not insecure, just tired of people belittling me and telling me I'm not good enough.

I'm not sure what you mean here --are you sharing your potential diagnosis with people who are then reacting to you this way, or are they reacting to behavior or sharing how you feel?

I've shared my diagnosis only with two people very close to me, I'd never share it with anyone I had any suspicion wouldn't 'get it.' Most people don't, and I think that's understandable (mistreating us isn't). I just don't think there's anything in it for me to share the diagnosis, in many cases.

Maybe I misunderstood, but you mentioned that your moods are being monitored for 6 months to determine a possible bipolar diagnosis, but also that you haven't seen a psychiatrist? I personally think the best qualified people to diagnose are psychiatrists (which isn't to say they're all great at what they do, though). Are you planning on seeing one? I think it's a very good idea to monitor moods over a period of time -some psychiatrists won't diagnose off the bat, because they want to go on more than verbal history, and witness and get to know the patient over time.

I'm sorry you're experiencing so much stigma.

[Sometimes psychotic]

All I can say is maybe you need new friends...I haven't experienced this at all. Everyone has been ultra supportive I'm actually closer to them now than before I got sick. They even visited me in inpatient. I may only have a few friends but they are good ones.

[~Christina]

Ahh I don't buy the " smarter people" are going to be more accepting. People from any walk of life is someone who might judge you and might now. I think it depends on who ever than person is and how they are in your life.

The Bipolar illness is unique to everyone. People with out Bipolar can try to understand what your Bipolar is like.

There are people all around this world that are going to look down on anyone for every and any reason, not just Mental Illness.

Just do what you need to do to learn how you can make life easier for you. I personally have had to end relationships with some people because they were just toxic to me and my life.

Keep living your life

Originally Posted by Sometimes psychotic

All I can say is maybe you need new friends...I haven't experienced this at all. Everyone has been ultra supportive I'm actually closer to them now than before I got sick. They even visited me in inpatient. I may only have a few friends but they are good ones.

_____________________________________

That's the way it's supposed to be, and I'm so glad to read this! Thank you.
And I'm sure your friends are nice people. I guess the answer is that we
just have to get the toxic ones out of our lives when it occurs for those
who experience it.