[phlashback]

It has been a while since I have been around. I'm struggling. I know we all have trouble sometimes but for me the world is spinning to much.

It was 1 year 5 months ago that My Dad passed from Pancratic Cancer. It was hard but we have managed. Two months ago A childhood friend took his life, difficult but I had strength. Three weeks ago mom was diagnosed with cancer, Ok feeling a bit raw but coping. Last Friday I got home from work to find my closest Uncle dead in his room from a suicide, my dog was with him for several hours and she is traumatized as well. Not to mention the image that I cannot erase from my mind.

Once again I'm starting to fall and not sure what to do. Income is so little I need help to keep my self under shelter let alone food. When it rains it must poor

If you are in treatment, I would suggest calling your T or pdoc. I know when my mom passed, I went into a tail spin that took a few years to truly recover from. If you are not in treatment, how about a clergyman, or even a hotline? Just someone to vent to.

Remember, you are not alone.

Jeffro

[comicgeek007]

I agree with Jeffro. We care here, too, but sometimes you need a physical voice. I'm very sorry for your losses. I wish I could give you a hug.

[middlepath]

Phlashback...I am so sorry. I think Jeffro is right, too. Call your T or pdoc. big hugs for you. just know that there are people who care.

[hannabee]

My, that certainly is a lot to deal with. Sending prayers your way. Hope things start looking up for you soon.

[Darth Bane]

i get that you are falling, but don't despair because you are falling, you are supposed to feel sad. from my experience, you should work on how to recover from this fall, in my case these falls are unstoppable i just wait till i get to my lowest and i try to recover from that. so lets say give 2 day to feel as sad as you can and then start trying to get the normal back....

[phlashback]

Thanks.. net went out and lost connection. I will try to keep in touch, and have tried to make appts but nothing is available to me right now. just lost at the moment.

Just keep trying. Hang in there. You are important.

[phlashback]

No more bad news! Just got word that a close friend died yesterday morning. He had a brain tumor that was sitting on his respiratory center (only known to his wife for the last couple years). Is it abnormal to feel like somehow it is me being cursed and actually bring this all down on the world. Rationally I know better but emotionally It is hard to distinguish.

I'm trying to be strong, and keep knocking on doors but it seems like no one is home. I need a vacation from these clouds that seem to be swirling in my mind.

Prayers going up now for you. One thing is definite; change is going to occur.