Over the last few days, I've noticed some weird things happening. First, I swear, I can hear someone calling my name, but nobody is. Hell, sometimes, nobody is around. I'm actually going out and feeling like I full of this confidence that I don't usually have, I can't sit still, I can't sleep even though I'm exhausted and haven't really slept since Monday.

But I'm getting things done. I'm catching up at work. I don't know what is going on in my head, and I think maybe I'm starting to cycle upward, which is just as scary to me as down. I'm spending money, I really don't have, but really don't care about it. I'm talking loud.

I'm lost, but I want to find my way. I can't let this beat me.

I'm just trying to get it all out so I can see it.

[Nessa213]

It's good that you are aware of it, but the spending is especially concerning. Can you give your cards to someone you trust just for a few weeks? Reckless spending can spiral out of control before you even realize it's happening.

Also, I get the "hearing someone call my name" thing quite often when I'm hypo, but I suspect it may be due to a lack of sleep which can really play tricks on your brain. Can you call a pdoc who might be able to give you something for sleep? I think the voices would go away for the most part with some regular sleep.

But! If you're IN GENERAL being relatively non destructive, being hypo isnt all bad. But sometimes when you're in that place your definition of "non destructive" becomes a bit flimsy. I'd love to say "sit back and enjoy the ride" but the lack of sleep, the voices and the spending shouldn't really be ignored.

There is someone that I can give my cards to, and I'll call her tomorrow morning, first thing. I might see her in church in the morning. I have a T appointment this week, and a pdoc next week. i'm on something for sleep, but it doesn't seem to help. I'm so tired, but I can't stay still long enough to fall asleep. I'm afraid to drive, b/c I have been drifting off when I don't want to. I hate this feeling. Feels like I'm not in control.

[LadyShadow]

Just stay calm. Try and do something extremely relaxing for a bit. Do some breathing exercises to bring yourself down. If your mind is racing, write down everything. Get it all out. What I had done when my mind was going crazy was start a blog. Wordpress.com is a free blog site.

As for hearing someone calling your name that never happened to me. But the excess spending I can relate to. I hope you see your friend tomorrow so you can give her your cards. That does concern me so I would try to stop the spending as soon as possible because Nessa is right, it can get out of control.

But get everything out. Wear yourself out. Then you will fall right to sleep.

[Nessa213]

That really is an awful feeling that always makes me feel trapped in a way... I can completely relate. Can you take a run somewhere? Or even take a walk. This is going to sound dumb too but I've been known to write a journal entry on my phone while I pace in my house. I'll write literally everything that goes through my head.

Something that I do also sometimes is if I'm laying down to go to sleep I'll just let my brain talk itself to sleep. Instead of thinking "ok, shut up thoughts, it's sleepy time now... shhhh" I just let the voices talk. Sure... it gets loud... but it's a nice distraction really. You just kind of work WITH that thing... whatever it is... that has taken over.

Even if this only results in a few hours of sleep it always makes me feel better at least.

[~Christina]

I would advise also.. Remove your access to purchase things. If you are unable to sleep at least try and lay down and do some meditation or just deep breathing.

You should probably call your Pdoc and get something started to curb this hypo/Mania. It's a good idea to have a game plan in place for times like this where you are aware you are hitting a hypo/manic phase.

Many people including myself have a Medication to use PRN (as needed) for when the pesky mood flips pop up.

Please stay safe and I hope you can get back onto even ground soon

I did get a few hours last night. Not many, but I last I did. They gave me a sleep aid to take, and I took it. I just don't like the feeling the next day, I feel very sluggish. I am giving my cards to a friend this morning, and am only aloud $40 at time, and I need to bring receipts to see what I get. I'm still trying to catch up from the last time. I can't afford another spree. I do feel a little calmer today. I never miss my meds, I know they are important to take.