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#901
Sep 19, 2013, 08:27 AM
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I'm just generally annoyed today. I have to go to a 2 day seminar for work that I really don't want to go to. I got up early, specifically so I could have some quiet, alone time and my husband decided to get up too. My cat is being an attention *****. I'm WAY behind in housework and I really would just like to go back to bed and sleep all day.
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[COLOR="DeepSkyBlue"][FONT="Century Gothic"]Dx: Bipolar II w/mixed episodes, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder, Insomnia Rx: Lamictal 100mg, Zoloft 75mg, Klonopin 0.5mg x1 /0.25 PRN “Insanity is knowing that what you're doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation |
 Anonymous100104, Anonymous53876
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 anneo59, roads
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#902
Sep 19, 2013, 01:36 PM
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posting,un-posting, posting, un-posting walking on a tight rope, irresponsible actions. would cry but i just gasp air . suspicious of helicopters and not knowing what to do about my son ,or whether to be in choir , to drive have to hockey parents blah blah blah, actually am thinking of just taking the car and leaving
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| anneo59, Anonymous53876
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#903
Sep 19, 2013, 02:20 PM
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The depression side has been rather successfully medicated but the manic/mania side is still acting up.
Its not so much "easier" to deal with as it is possible to deal with since I am so acutely aware of it now. I probably shouldn't be manipulating it to my "advantage" but at times I gotta do what I gotta do. I had to work a double (3:30p-10:30p then midnight-8am) and it was all I could do to drive home before I plopped out for 4 hours. I have all that mania stuff running thru my head and while I have become pretty good at not acting on it, I would much prefer it wasnt there to start with. |
| anneo59, Blue_Bird
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#904
Sep 19, 2013, 09:20 PM
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Update, I started feeling somewhat depressed again, not extremely but enough to where I have no energy. I miss the energy aspect of hypomania, almost tempted to go off meds to get it back but I won't because I know it's a bad idea and I'll regret it afterwards.
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“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
| anneo59
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#905
Sep 19, 2013, 11:39 PM
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I did a bad thing.
I impulse spent $175 on makeup at the MAC store while shopping with a coworker on my lunch break. Hubby is not going to be happy.
__________________
[COLOR="DeepSkyBlue"][FONT="Century Gothic"]Dx: Bipolar II w/mixed episodes, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder, Insomnia Rx: Lamictal 100mg, Zoloft 75mg, Klonopin 0.5mg x1 /0.25 PRN “Insanity is knowing that what you're doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation |
| anneo59, Blue_Bird, shezbut
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#906
Sep 20, 2013, 12:00 AM
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YAY! I figured out why I was out of sorts yesterday, it was PMS and today I feel much better. So glad it wasnt an indication of my mood going one way or another.
Im a little bored today, the house is absolutely spotless, the weather is too bad to play outside and I dont feel I have the concentration for watching tv shows. I did some of my therapy course but the assignment was to be kind to myself and do something I enjoy for 10 minutes every day for a week. Im not too sure what I can do that I enjoy - does being online count? Cos I do that for way more than 10 minutes a day haha. I already go and play with my ponies and puppies every day which is the thing I enjoy most in life. I was thinking of picking up a shift at my second job where I havent been working for a little while, but I am so much happier not working there, I am not nearly as stressed out and life seems to flow that little bit better. I enjoyed the job but I think it was probably extending myself a little too much for now.  to you all
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| anneo59
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#907
Sep 20, 2013, 12:16 AM
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Quote:
__________________
[COLOR="DeepSkyBlue"][FONT="Century Gothic"]Dx: Bipolar II w/mixed episodes, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder, Insomnia Rx: Lamictal 100mg, Zoloft 75mg, Klonopin 0.5mg x1 /0.25 PRN “Insanity is knowing that what you're doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation |
| anneo59
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#908
Sep 20, 2013, 12:23 AM
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Quote:
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| anneo59
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#909
Sep 20, 2013, 01:03 AM
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Mood has been up and down all day. Feeling ok now, but that can change at any moment. Went out to dinner alone and saw a really cute guy eating alone and didn't have the courage to go up to him and say hi because I think I'm too ugly. So many opportunities pass me by all the time. Life itself is just passing me by.
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Tales of Love, Motivation, and An Interesting Journey - Please Subscribe to my Website on WordPress: Inspired Odyssey's Journey of Grace, Grit and Starting Again |
| anneo59
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#910
Sep 20, 2013, 07:55 AM
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I don't want to jinx it, but I think my depression is starting to lift. I can't say I felt happy or good yesterday, but I also didn't feel like just crawling into bed and hiding. Today I feel a bit ill, but not sure what is causing it (could be anything at all really, including actually getting sick!).
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"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| anneo59, Anonymous37807
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#911
Sep 20, 2013, 08:17 AM
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I also think my depression may be lifting - - could be that I've been on viibryd for a little more than 6 weeks. I don't feel that dread and apprehension when I wake up in the morning. I don't feel so clingy to my husband. I feel bored and unfulfilled a lot though. Still not back to my old self but getting there.
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#912
Sep 20, 2013, 10:16 AM
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Hey, newgal, that's sounding pretty sweet to me. Progress? Now to fine tune it, with pdoc & support network. That you've come this far gives all still wandering hope--thanks!
Roadie 
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roads & Charlie |
| anneo59
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#915
Sep 20, 2013, 10:32 AM
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Hi Rob, grew up in NC btw, I don't have any answers here, I know many more people know more about dreams and it's been researched, but I tend to just thinik of them as dreams, even when actual nite terrors. For me, usually dials down the anxiety, tho not always. The best!
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#916
Sep 20, 2013, 02:08 PM
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Just ok. I'm sleeping a lot. I think it takes a long time to get the hard drugs from the hospital out of your system. And the pain is hard to take. They said it would hurt really bad, and I said yeah, yeah, I've had migraines for 43 years and arthritis for 26 years. Well, they were right, it does hurt a lot. But nothing worse than I've experienced before. The good news is when the pain from surgery is gone in about 6 weeks, there'll be no more arthritis pain in my right knee. I refuse to take their hard drugs, because they mess me up physically and mentally, so Tylenol it is. I can't take Advil or aspirin because I'm on blood thinners. Not being mobile is the worst part. My daughter send me an Edible Arrangement this morning (fruit instead of flowers) and I didn't make it to the door buzzer in time to let the delivery man into the building. Thankfully, someone else let him in, and I got my fruit. Mmmm good !
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Dx: BP2 with GAD and OCD Seroquel 100 mg Risperdal 0.5 mg Clonazepam (Klonopin) 1.5 mg Buspar 5 mg Lamictal 200 mg Coversyl Plus for high blood pressure Crestor for high cholesterol Asmanex Ventolin  |
| anneo59, Blue_Bird, shezbut, Victoria'smom
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#917
Sep 20, 2013, 04:24 PM
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I've been extremely frustrated with myself. I feel like I want to do things but I can't get myself out of this deep depression to get motivated enough
__________________
“All the darkness in the world cannot extinguish the light of a single candle.” -St. Francis of Assisi Diagnosis: Schizoaffective disorder Bipolar type PTSD Social Anxiety Disorder Anorexia Binge/Purge type |
| Anonymous37807
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#918
Sep 20, 2013, 08:09 PM
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Depression- Anxiety-Overwhelmed- unloved- Horribly tired- Irritable and feeling sick from over eating
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| Blue_Bird, Victoria'smom
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#919
Sep 20, 2013, 09:51 PM
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Feeliing good. Probably shouldn't have drank so much, but I feel good regardless. Today was a good day. Got a lot done. Things could be a lot worse.
__________________
Tales of Love, Motivation, and An Interesting Journey - Please Subscribe to my Website on WordPress: Inspired Odyssey's Journey of Grace, Grit and Starting Again |
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#920
Sep 20, 2013, 10:49 PM
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I'm feeling pretty good. The depression seems to have lifted a little this week. The Lamictal must be working. Hopefully this is a sign of great things to come!
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Bi-polar 2 Lamictal 225 titrating up to 300 mg Celexa 40 mg Wellbutrin 300 mg Deplin 15 mg Klonopin .5 prn Benicar 20mg Synthroid .1 mcg |
| Phoenix_1
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#921
Sep 20, 2013, 11:11 PM
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Wide awake, no plans to sleep but bored out of my mind.
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#922
Sep 21, 2013, 07:56 AM
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Yesterday I felt mostly normal!
__________________
"The time has come, the Walrus said, to talk of many things. Of shoes, of ships, of sealing wax, of cabbages, of kings! Of why the sea is boiling hot, of whether pigs have wings..." "I have a problem with low self-esteem. Which is really ridiculous when you consider how amazing I am. |
| Phoenix_1
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#924
Sep 21, 2013, 10:36 AM
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I'm OK today. I think I'm maintaining at baseline, which is a nice change.
I have a pdoc appointment on Wednesday morning and I'm worried that she won't move me up to the next level of my Lamictal though, because I know this baseline mood is just temporary. Other than that, I haven't had a ton of anxiety or anything. A little bit yesterday, but nothing my Klons couldn't handle.
__________________
[COLOR="DeepSkyBlue"][FONT="Century Gothic"]Dx: Bipolar II w/mixed episodes, PTSD, Anxiety Disorder, Insomnia Rx: Lamictal 100mg, Zoloft 75mg, Klonopin 0.5mg x1 /0.25 PRN “Insanity is knowing that what you're doing is completely idiotic, but still, somehow, you just can't stop it.” ― Elizabeth Wurtzel, Prozac Nation |
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#925
Sep 21, 2013, 12:04 PM
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Had two major naps yesterday (hadn't taken a nap in over 3wks)....finally woke up at 1:30AM, went back to sleep and woke up at 4:30AM, feeling refreshed.
Also had a Starbucks big coffee (don't know, neither care to know their fancy name for it) Almost time for breakfast and med
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 Dx: Bipolar II with slightly manic baseline Rx: Geodon and Trileptal. |
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