[FallenTree]

The manias and the highs I have experienced over the years have always had a spiritual dimension to them. Enough so that I began to realize that there is " a whole lot more to this place than meets the eyes" It caused me to seach out and to seek the deeper meanings of this life. A big part of that evolved into my belief in God. I have as of late been going through a most difficult depression - the worst in many years. The thing I noticed most was that God seemed less real to me - I couldn't feel him nor find him. I was separted and alone. The thoughts of death and non-existance seem more realistic then those of warmth and love...

[LadyShadow]

I struggle with this often too, You are not alone in your troubles. God is watching over us. We just have to believe. I have lost my faith many times in my life, especially during my most depressed moods, and have thought I have spoken to Him directly in my most manic states.

Hugs to you and hoping you find your place.

[gayleggg]

I think it's because when we are depressed it is hard for us to believe in anything. We lose our self-esteem. We lose our energy to provide for our needs. We doubt our world will provide for us. We doubt our loved ones care. Why should it surprise us to find we doubt our faith. When we are depressed we close oursleves off form everything and everyone and that includes God. When the depression lifts we see reality again.

I think Gayleggg pretty well covered it!

[serloco]

Yes, and I think that God plays a big role in lifting us out of our depression when we do come out of it.

[Skittles56]

I'm exactly the opposite. When I'm manic I hold God at arm's length or more. When I'm depressed, I talk to Him every day.

[avlady]

i agree with gayleggg and skittles, although they contradict each other. the bible is the most contradiction book there is. that is why it takes a lifetime to understand if at all, but just knowing it's there we can if a person believes in it, i mean, we can look for passages and psalms etc to support our situations and feelings for comfort. i hope this doesn't offend anybody, but i'm basically talking about the Good Book.

I believe faith is a gift and with it you are ahead of the game. I don't have that gift and feel no G would create something as flawed and I. My advise is KEEP THE FAITH !

[FallenTree]

I was reading the other day that the human brain contains 100 billion neurons...that if each neuron was represented by a piece of paper - that stack of papers would reach some 5,000 miles. What?

I've then got to ask "what is this place we call Earth?" Where did it come from? Why is it here? Why are we here...at all... in he first place? Is it possible that the human brain is the result of some cosmic accident or random chance like natural selection?

I am still forced to conclude that surely "there is more to this place than meets the eyes"

[Amelie10]

Fallen Tree, I can so relate. I know God is always with me and I never stop reaching out, praying, etc. But when I am depressed I feel alone and far away. When I'm hypomanic, I get chills just thinking about God. I feel like I'm in love, that butterfly feeling when I thing of God. I love it. But I have to remember that God loves me not matter what my mood is.