An Observation

I see a lot of posts that detail stupid **** that happens to people when they are in one state or the other. Many times, they either blame their bipolar or have trouble differentiating between something that would happen to anyone in the same situation and something that would only happen due to bipolar. I know I do sometimes.

I'm not talking about things that are obviously bipolar, like running through a shopping mall, stark naked and screaming our head off, or alternately, being unable to get out of bed without wanting to kill ourselves. What I'm talking about are fairly normal interactions with the world, especially interpersonal relationships. "Bob did this to me because I'm bipolar." "Jane was acting mean and I think it's because I'm bipolar." "I got angry at Joe because he did this or that and it was because I'm bipolar."

Maybe being bipolar makes us hypersensitive to our environment. Maybe not. I know that when I'm manic, I couldn't give a **** less about what I'm doing to other people. But a lot of times people are just stupid and ******. They would be that way whether we are bipolar or not.

The reason I mention this is because it can be a slippery slope for us. We get our panties in a wad over something simple and then it gets away with us, with the result depending on which pole for which we are headed. We have difficulty with causality. The event happened because we are bipolar, or the event is neutral, but the result is a function of bipolar.

Sorry if this is tl;dr, but I like to put things that go through my head into writing.

..............in a bad mood?

I know I have trouble recognizing when it's bipolar and when it's me. However, it's everything is me. I only recognize bipolar is when I'm so depressed I actually notice. I often rely on you guys, T, and occasionally people around me to tell me I'm in a mood swing. It's hard for me to trust my family because of the "Is it actually him in a bad mood or is it really me?"

I really don't think this board blame bipolar for most of life issues but that's just my opinion.

I fear my perception may be stilted or slewed due to same so I really am never sure or completely trust my own senses.."IF" my brain is really affected my judgement of the world may be also... just a thought

Great topic!

I think a huge part of the 'bipolar journey' is differentiating between what is the 'bipolar' and what is not. Most people, by virtue of being human, have other issues as well. And especially how we act in relationships (and I think especially close and/or intimate ones) is affected by soooo many things, that unless you're in a full blown episode, it's likely that there are other things at play (or at least in addition). If our significant other is angry or disappointed in us because of something we did, said, didn't do, etc., it's relatively 'easy' to blame it on the bipolar. Maybe it is, maybe it isn't... But I think these things at least merit a second look and it's worth it not to jump to that conclusion, if that's the temptation.

As I've said before, just because someone has bipolar disorder, doesn't mean they don't have *all kinds* of other 'moods' that have nothing to do with it: so you can be down, angry, irritated, happy, tired, energetic, etc. and not be in an 'episode.' The good news about parsing this out is that we likely have more control over these 'non-bipolar' moods and can even learn from them (and the related behaviors); the 'bad news' is that we can't blame them on...the bipolar disorder (especially if it involves something we feel ashamed of).

One thing to keep in mind is that most people aren't constantly cycling, which means that likely much of the time we're out there in the same 'world' as everyone else. With the same triumphs and tragedies of others, the same challenges, the same responsibilities, the same learning curve as far as coping with what life throws us.

Well, as this is a mood thing, let me make a small analogy. If your SO likes to tease you by poking at you, if you have had good sleep and are in a good mood you can laugh it off. And if you slept like crap and are in a bad mood that same action is likely to end up causing an argument. So the mood state does color the reaction to the stimulus.

A good example for me is annoyance. I get annoyed with my wife and have to restrain myself from lashing out (verbally) at her. I then wonder if I am going manic because my annoyance threshold goes way down. But maybe it's just that she's being annoying. We've been married for 35 years. We definitely know each other's buttons.

But you could say the same thing about someone who is not bipolar. Bipolar is not about the mood itself, except in the case of extreme depression or extreme mania. Bipolar is about the wild mood swings. Like I said above, my wife can piss me off and it doesn't have anything to do with bipolar. It just means I am in a mood that is likely to cause me to be annoyed. I would probably have been in that mood even if I wasn't bipolar.

What I mean is, the same action can be viewed differently depending on your mood. When I am feeling 'sassy' getting poked is funny...when I am feeling 'growly' getting poked is going to get a punch thrown.

I'll put it a different way. This is what happens when I start to get manic, I start to get hypersexual but I look at OTHER men, not my husband and I get very critical and sensitive (angry) to everything he does, even though he is probably not being any different than usual. That is my therapist's first real clue, my attitude.
When I start to go down, I get very clingy and everything he does that is teasing is amplified and hurts my feelings (weepy). Also a clue but easier to detect than the mania.

He is not being different...I am reacting differently to him depending on how my mood state is. Although to his credit he TRIES to accommodate the moods. After 27 years, its still tough cause even I can't see them coming most times.

It's taken a long time, but now that I've been stable for a couple of months, I've finally had the chance to figure out some of "what's me and what's my disorder". Like when I was going through all the agony of my husband's cancer diagnosis and the anticipation of losing him, my underlying mood was stable, and I was only reacting the way anyone would under the circumstances. The best part was that I recognized it for what it was, and didn't worry about whether I was going into a new mood episode.

I can't believe how awesome it is to wake up in the morning and NOT have to do an instant gut-check: "OK, what kind of mood am I in today?" The flip side, of course, is that I might not realize when an episode is on the horizon, but at least now I'm getting an idea of what the 'normal' ups and downs of life are.

I think my family tends to attribute all of my "bad" behaviors to my BP far more than I do. If I'm irritated because I've had a tough day and somebody cut me off in traffic, or if I start biting people's heads off because they're annoying the hell out of me, they say things like "Did you take your meds today?" Drives me up the wall.

Can anxiety be blamed on bipolar?

I've been reading up on the connections between bipolar and anxiety (because I have both) and some of the things I've read say that many folks with bipolar will also present with anxiety problems too...not to say all of us, but it is not unheard of to have both issues.

Awesome question. I'd be curious to know too.

Lord, I hope I get there one day.

Me too.

My pdoc says it can. That's why I don't have a diagnosis of GAD, just BP.

Before i was diagnosed with bp... I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety and panic disorder. I still have to take benzos when I'm down...cuz with the blues comes the scaries...nightmares and wverything. Some mornings i wake up and take adavan before i have my coffee. But when im manic...i rule the world *****!!!!

Bipolar Symptoms Stronger When Anxiety Disorder is Present | Psych Central News

not a scientific journal presentation but we all seem to like psychcentral pretty well I think.

I seem to take anxiety to new levels, I surprised my pdoc this past spring even, which was how I got the luvox added. It is an antidepressant, labeled for OCD here in the states, off label for social anxiety.

Thanks! I will deff read right away. Thanks for responding. Means a lot

eGood article. Ive been addmitted to hospital 4 times since jan. The first time was to end 6 months of full blown mania.

I think they're separate, in that they have different origins, the causes of each are likely different. But there is co-morbidity. I think they can affect each other, but no, I don't think anxiety is *caused* by bipolar, and it's something that can be helped by therapy (and maybe meds).

I wouldn't blame my anxiety on being bipolar. Because the anxiety can be just as hard on me when I'm baseline as it can be when I'm depressed.

However! I also fully think that my bipolar can make the anxiety worse, because it can be rather unpredictable and that can increase my anxiety. Or I can act and behave in ways that are out of character for me, and could have anxiety over the worry about what other people will think.

Exactly.