[kreg]

A woman I work with says she's bipolar. Probably is because she's been in the psych ward twice lately. She was crying at work once and didn't know why. She also says she's got a thyroid problem and has lost thirty lbs. this year. She's so skinny! Leading up to this last hospitalization she was so hyper! A lot of fun to be around. You couldn't throw a joke at her but that she'd send one back at you so fast you couldn't keep ahead of her. Her meds must be working because she's much calmer. I told her she needs to back off on the meds because she's not as much fun anymore. I also told her she looks as much as five years younger. Most of the stress lines in her face are gone. I know that'd make her feel good and it's true. She's probably late 50's. We're the best of friends.

[Axiom]

Originally Posted by kreg

A woman I work with says she's bipolar. Probably is because she's been in the psych ward twice lately. She was crying at work once and didn't know why. She also says she's got a thyroid problem and has lost thirty lbs. this year. She's so skinny! Leading up to this last hospitalization she was so hyper! A lot of fun to be around. You couldn't throw a joke at her but that she'd send one back at you so fast you couldn't keep ahead of her. Her meds must be working because she's much calmer. I told her she needs to back off on the meds because she's not as much fun anymore. I also told her she looks as much as five years younger. Most of the stress lines in her face are gone. I know that'd make her feel good and it's true. She's probably late 50's. We're the best of friends.

Really, to be perfectly honest, her meds are none of your business. She needs them, and she shouldn't have to endure a serious illness just so that she can be more fun to be around when she's up. There is probably a good reason as to why she is on these meds. Mania rarely comes without severe depressive phases and when it does, it is still very destructive. I'm sorry if I offend you, but I really don't think you're doing the right thing here. Don't make her ill when she can be more healthy with meds.

"Bipolar disorder is a mental illness that causes changes in mood and energy, with episodes of both mania and depression. During the manic episodes, patients swing into an unrealistically high state of mind and can sometimes lose touch with reality. On the extreme end, they may believe they have super powers, or to a lesser extent, shop impulsively for expensive items they don't need and usually can't afford.

These episodes alternate with periods of normal mood, as well as periods of depression. During depressive episodes, there is typically a lack of energy and motivation, irritability, sadness, and a feeling of hopelessness. In between manias and depressions, there can be periods where the patient seems normal, balanced, and in control. A small percentage of bipolar patients do, however, experience chronic residual symptoms."

"The threat of suicide among patients with bipolar disorder is very real -- and it can occur during either the depressive or the manic state. Stress as well as personal traumatic events can also increase the risk. Up to 15% of people with bipolar disorder complete the act of suicide, and many more try. "

Frequently Asked Questions About Bipolar Disorder

There is also a very significant risk of psychosis. If you want to be a good friend to her, you should read up on the illness. Right now I do not think you're being a good friend. I might be overstepping some boundaries by saying this, but what you are doing is potentially very dangerous for her and the people around her.

[Alokin]

This is shocking, why are you posting this?

[Themeanreds]

Originally Posted by Axiom

Really, to be perfectly honest, her meds are none of your business. She needs them, and she shouldn't have to endure a serious illness just so that she can be more fun to be around when she's up. There is probably a good reason as to why she is on these meds. Mania rarely comes without severe depressive phases and when it does, it is still very destructive. I'm sorry if I offend you, but I really don't think you're doing the right thing here. Don't make her ill when she can be more healthy with meds.

"Bipolar disorder is a mental illness that causes changes in mood and energy, with episodes of both mania and depression. During the manic episodes, patients swing into an unrealistically high state of mind and can sometimes lose touch with reality. On the extreme end, they may believe they have super powers, or to a lesser extent, shop impulsively for expensive items they don't need and usually can't afford.

These episodes alternate with periods of normal mood, as well as periods of depression. During depressive episodes, there is typically a lack of energy and motivation, irritability, sadness, and a feeling of hopelessness. In between manias and depressions, there can be periods where the patient seems normal, balanced, and in control. A small percentage of bipolar patients do, however, experience chronic residual symptoms."

"The threat of suicide among patients with bipolar disorder is very real -- and it can occur during either the depressive or the manic state. Stress as well as personal traumatic events can also increase the risk. Up to 15% of people with bipolar disorder complete the act of suicide, and many more try. "

There is also a very significant risk of psychosis. If you want to be a good friend to her, you should read up on the illness. Right now I do not think you're being a good friend. I might be overstepping some boundaries by saying this, but what you are doing is potentially very dangerous for her and the people around her.

Great response! I too was the source of entertainment for my coworkers. So much fun in hypomanic mode, until the mixed episodes, and then the depressed episodes. And I do not cycle rapidly, my states last, sometimes for months. Now that I am properly treating my BP (meds and therapy) I am certainly not as much fun, but I feel so much better inside, like my feet are on the ground and I am not being swirled up into hypomania, or smashed down into crippling depression.

To the OP:
I notice so many people tell me I should stop the meds, because they think my stability, or the fact that my hypomania is considered fun and entertaining, that means I am not bipolar. I have the temptation to start buying into this, and to stop the meds. Whenever I have in the past, HUGE mistake.

Please do not encourage a person with BP to stop taking meds. Would you tell a diabetic to stop taking insulin??? Both illnesses are life threatening, and the meds reduce the mortality rate in both illnesses significantly. You are not a psychiatrist, and your coworker does not exist for entertainment purposes. This is her life we are talking about.

[monochromatic]

wow OP. that's like telling a diabetic to stop taking insulin. you're not a very good friend, are you?

[thickntired]

Shoot I did not mean to thank this post. Stupid tap talk

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[NuckingFutz]

Just wanted to say it seems you really care about your friend. You care enough to post on this board about it.

I'm glad you felt entertained by your friend. I wanted to say that when I was in a manic phase last, I felt a lot like you described your friend to be. Although I threw jokes and laughed, I was miserable inside. I didn't have the power to stop the mania just like I don't have the power to stop the depression (without meds, therapy, and self improvement strategies). I didn't want to manic, I didn't know what was going to come out of my mouth before I'd already said something.

Sounds like you said, that your friend has gotten stable. I hope she stays stable and doesn't have to suffer the consequences of the mania or depression. I'm sure she is a lot happier (for real, not manic).

Please let your friend be at peace and may you support her decision to do what she needs to in order to stay stable.

[Victoria'smom]

So hospitalization when "hyper" unusually means she had a psychotic break. At least here it does. Hospitalization when depressed usually means she had intended or her dr was worried that she would commit suicide. No one wishes either. (hypo)mania or "hyper" can and does ruin families, holiday's, jobs, credit, and the ability to keep utilities, housing, food and general life's needs. The best part is the person doesn't realize or care when "hyper". Then comes the crash.

All the things you lost while (hypo)manic or "hyper" tends to fuel our depression because now we've screwed up, lost every thing, or at the very least acted like asses. So support her in her choice. It's incredibly hard to take medication every day. Even harder when others say not to.

[kreg]

[quote=kreg; A lot of fun to be around. I told her she needs to back off on the meds because she's not as much fun anymore. I also told her she

That was my fault sorry! She knows I was only joking. I'd never want her to go off the meds. Last night though I sensed some of that old self again. She was making wise cracks on things I said. They told her to expect some of that.

[~Christina]

Prior to being diagnosed and medicated apparently I was alot of fun and pretty wild ..... One day my husband said " I wish you were the "ole Chris" sometimes .. you were a blast ... Yes I broke into many pieces that day and did wind up in a psych ward 2 weeks later suicidal. Point being .. If she is your friend she is your friend whether you like her better up or down .. words can and do hurt alot . It took months in therapy for me to get over what my husband said .

In general people need to take more time when choosing words with a friend spouse or love .. words can and do hurt .. Kindness isnt so hard to offer.

[venusss]

As for the meds.... there is a difference between stable on meds and medicated zombie. Imho, in that case, if it is your friend... maybe it's not "OMG horrible advice" to try to talk to her that there seems to be something wrong... but it needs to be done in sensitive matter. I don't know... I knew somebody who was troubled, went on meds.... and first disappeared in spirit and then probably in body too (nobody of my group knows what become to her and I hope it's just she lives somewhere far away and hates Facebook).

But I agree with others... people are not here for you entertaiment. If she is bit more "boring" on the outside, but happy... be happy for her.

(don't even get me started on the diabetes line. Do people seriously believe it or do they know they use it as some sort of metaphore?)

[choocha]

Yeah, I have the same kinds of things said to me. That they preferred the old me. Does that then mean that they don't like the more normal, stable me? I'm sorry that they found my crzier, dangerous, unwell side so funny and entertaining and my new medicated self so boring.
What you said was thoughtless and redundant. You should think more before you speak or write.