[ExistingInChanges]

I'm trying to recover from my recent mental health hospital stay and my mind is fighting me every step of the way. I can't caught any kind of break right now. My brain is haywire. I was re diagnosed with bipolar and they say I have rapidly cycling mood swings. I knew something was up with my brain, but I thought everyone had these mood swings. It was just so normal to me...something I have had to deal with as long as I can remember. I didn't want to admit to myself I had bipolar. I read up on it and gained knowledge about it, though and I think they are right in the diagnoses. It is just a hard pill (literally) to swallow. To know that there is no cure and I will always be this way is probably the hardest part to accept.
Question: How do you all cope with knowing that these mood swings are always going to be there and there is nothing you can do about it?

[Marshellette]

Do you like chocolate. Do or eat something you really love.

[otroo]

It is hard at times to deal with it but you just have to know you are now stuck with it. When you are on the right meds you will feel better me myself I like a little manic now and then.

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I cope by finding the right meds and going to a weekly support group (free group sponsored by NAMI).

[wildflowerchild25]

I try to live in the moment. When I am feeling good, I do not worry about when the crash will come, even though I know it will. I just enjoy where I am at. When I am feeling bad, I do not live in the moment. I just try to accept that I am suffering right now but that it will change. It's very hard when I'm in a depression to remember that. What I struggle with most is asking for help. I hate asking for help when I need it. But during my last depressed episode, I decided to get over myself and do it. It was really a life or death situation. And I found a med that actually helped. So, mindfulness is really helpful, as is admitting when you can't do it on your own.

[ChaoticSymphony]

I guess asking question and educating myself is what is helping me. Feeling normal in this abnormality and losing the shame associated with it (still a work in progress). Not making it your identity but a mere part of who you really are. Allowing myself to just be, not questioning if every mood swing is bipolar or life event (drove me mad). The meds will give you some help with that part if you have chose meds.

[x_BabyG_x]

I agree with wildflowerchild, living in the moment is the best thing you can do rather than worrying whats coming next all the time. But even when im feeling a bit dull I let myself indulge a little bit. sometimes you have to - I have realised that if you allow your mind a little rest from fighting it gives you that extra boost when you push yourself to try and pick yourself up back on to your feet.

Remember as well that with this illness, our thoughts are constantly interchanging with our moods... you wont feel like this forever and your guaranteed to feel better eventually, even if for only a short time! Wait for that moment, and then use it to act upon it when it finally arrives.

hugs! x0x0

[Beepee]

Good advice, wildflowerchild and babyg. Don't overlook the positive times. If you do, it feels like you never have any.

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[Victoria'smom]

How do you all cope with knowing that these mood swings are always going to be there and there is nothing you can do about it? I had this before the DX. I don't separate mood swings from regular moods. Just at times I have an extreme reactions. It doesn't mean that it isn't justified to be upset but its not something that I should crumble into tears about or that I'd feel justified maiming someone/something.

I read everything I could get my hands on to try and understand it when I got dxed in 06. I was already very much physician oriented (I'm sick doc, fix it) so taking meds wasnt a big deal, though I get those days when I really dont want to take them. Only cause I feel like an old lady with all my pills. I got involved in a nami weekly peer support group which really helped. I work very closely with my pdoc and therapist so have managed to have had only one hospitalization back in 2010.
I think when I am feeling good I just try to enjoy the things I am able to do. I am a quiet bper, its been mostly hypomanias with subsequent mixed moods. When things go downwards I see my drs more frequently, do med adjustments and try to be gentle with myself. My husband gets impatient with the depressions but he does try to provide comfort if I ask.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by emomom

I read everything I could get my hands on to try and understand it when I got dxed in 06. I was already very much physician oriented (I'm sick doc, fix it) so taking meds wasnt a big deal, though I get those days when I really dont want to take them. Only cause I feel like an old lady with all my pills. I got involved in a nami weekly peer support group which really helped. I work very closely with my pdoc and therapist so have managed to have had only one hospitalization back in 2010.
I think when I am feeling good I just try to enjoy the things I am able to do. I am a quiet bper, its been mostly hypomanias with subsequent mixed moods. When things go downwards I see my drs more frequently, do med adjustments and try to be gentle with myself. My husband gets impatient with the depressions but he does try to provide comfort if I ask.

I'm very sorry he gets impatient with you in that regard. It must be extremely hard to deal with. If you're depressed, then that is when the most support is needed.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by Marshellette

Do you like chocolate. Do or eat something you really love.

Thanks. That sounds like a good idea to indulge in a comfort food.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by otroo

It is hard at times to deal with it but you just have to know you are now stuck with it. When you are on the right meds you will feel better me myself I like a little manic now and then.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Thank you. The meds do definitely give me a clearer head. I'm sorry you still have to deal with mania at times. It sounds like you have things under control though, so that is really good. Sorry for my late reply.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by wildflowerchild25

I try to live in the moment. When I am feeling good, I do not worry about when the crash will come, even though I know it will. I just enjoy where I am at. When I am feeling bad, I do not live in the moment. I just try to accept that I am suffering right now but that it will change. It's very hard when I'm in a depression to remember that. What I struggle with most is asking for help. I hate asking for help when I need it. But during my last depressed episode, I decided to get over myself and do it. It was really a life or death situation. And I found a med that actually helped. So, mindfulness is really helpful, as is admitting when you can't do it on your own.

Yes, it is very hard to ask for help when you need it.
Thanks for the advice. I will try it out. I think its a good idea to remind myself that change is constant and that its a good thing that I won't be stuck in the mood forever, because you really don't need to be stuck in one mood forever. If you were, you would never experience anything else and never be able to relate to anyone else. So I guess I just need to accept I have the mood swings and be at least thankful that I'm not stuck in the same mood all the time. My manic states are full of rage and aggression(except for one manic state I had). Then my depression gets so bad that they thought I had major depressive disorder at one point. So, I have to be on my meds to level things out in ways.
Sorry it took me so long to get back to you. I thought the website automatically notified me of replies and they don't...

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by ChaoticSymphony

I guess asking question and educating myself is what is helping me. Feeling normal in this abnormality and losing the shame associated with it (still a work in progress). Not making it your identity but a mere part of who you really are. Allowing myself to just be, not questioning if every mood swing is bipolar or life event (drove me mad). The meds will give you some help with that part if you have chose meds.

Not making it your identity is the hardest part for me. It is like it becomes your personality and you can't find the real you, because you just don't know who you are anymore. Allowing yourself to be sounds like a good idea. I did choose to be on meds. They help me so much that I don't think I could function without them.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by x_BabyG_x

I agree with wildflowerchild, living in the moment is the best thing you can do rather than worrying whats coming next all the time. But even when im feeling a bit dull I let myself indulge a little bit. sometimes you have to - I have realised that if you allow your mind a little rest from fighting it gives you that extra boost when you push yourself to try and pick yourself up back on to your feet.

Remember as well that with this illness, our thoughts are constantly interchanging with our moods... you wont feel like this forever and your guaranteed to feel better eventually, even if for only a short time! Wait for that moment, and then use it to act upon it when it finally arrives.

hugs! x0x0

Thank you so much for your reply and advice. It makes sense to allow your brain to rest, because it takes so much out of you to have so many constant mood changes throughout the day. It sounds like a good way to recharge your brain.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by Beepee

Good advice, wildflowerchild and babyg. Don't overlook the positive times. If you do, it feels like you never have any.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Yeah. I think it is hard to make yourself see the positive experiences.

[ExistingInChanges]

Originally Posted by Miguel'smom

How do you all cope with knowing that these mood swings are always going to be there and there is nothing you can do about it? I had this before the DX. I don't separate mood swings from regular moods. Just at times I have an extreme reactions. It doesn't mean that it isn't justified to be upset but its not something that I should crumble into tears about or that I'd feel justified maiming someone/something.

That makes sense as viewing them as a more intense reaction. I don't think I'm to that point where I can do that yet. I don't think I can make my mind understand this completely yet, because its overwhelming to me to view it like this. I think I get what you're saying, though, that even if you have the mood swing or reaction that you shouldn't act on it?...sorry if I'm not understanding.

That people do remarkable things, in spite of the biggest lifelong challenges, gives me faith. Bipolar disorder is just one of the various handicaps that people can have. Modern medicine, and advancements in medical technology, gives me faith.

I am so fortunate to be living in the 21st century, rather than 100 or 200 years ago. Who knows what my life would be like as a woman with intense BP?

Bad things can happen to anyone at any time. Challenges inspire improvement. My aim is to get through every day no matter how hard it gets, and to make life brighter for others in any small way I can. Who knows how much they're suffering? I just want there to be hope, and to give hope, because that is all we have to keep us going at the end of the day.

Good luck.