[littlemiss44]

I am so tired of feeling this way people! I know we all suffer together and that gives me some comfort to know in not alone. But why do I still feel so alone? I feel like I'm in a rabbit hole and I can't climb out. I feel trapped in this body with no where to run. If only I could run away from my brain I would!

I have loved ones around me but I still feel lonely. Does anyone else feel that way? I'm bp2 depression bpd, anxiety and ptsd. I met my fantastic bf over two years ago and I feel that he's too good to be true. He loves me so much. Only after one year together I was hospitalized and he still stuck with me. How am I so worthy of this love baffles me. I'm on lots of meds: geodon, lamictal, latuda, lexapro, neurontin and adderall for my adhd. I hate taking every single one. I'm sorry if I'm a downer but I needed to vent to get these feelings out of my head.

With all these issues I'm on ssd. Im hardly able to hold down a pt job. I have to work so I can afford my meds. Every couple years social security looks at people on ssd to see if they are still disabled. Are they serious!!?? I have life long illnesses that don't just magically disappear. I've been having regular panic attacks and I think it's linked to this thing with my ssd. I feel so insecure about my future. Do they not realize that by doing this to people can make their symptoms worse?!

I'm also dealing with the fact that my daughter has been smoking pot! She is such a good girl. Not defiant whatsoever. She just got caught up in the wrong crowd. She has like 6 close friends from childhood who would never smoke pot so I told her to cling to those friends...that the other ones don't have her best interest at heart. We had a good talk but I can't help but think that it's somehow my fault. Because she's grown up with a mi mother and she's self medicating. She has her own mental struggles. She has major social anxiety and regular panic attacks. I've had her in therapy for about 6 years just for the fact that she has a mi mother. I wanted to make sure she stayed on the right path besides growing up with me. Has my illness affected her so much that she's lost? Anyways I've rambled on about a few diff subjects. Has anyone else struggled with a lost teenager? Is it my fault? Has anyone else been investigated by ss to see if they're still disabled? Any feedback would help me so much. Thx for listening.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk

[outlaw sammy]

First of all, please don't ever apologize for your symptoms. That's like apologizing for having red hair. It's not your fault! Please accept your BP symptoms for what they are - the symptoms of a mental illness.

Secondly, it is routine for the Social Security Admin. to "re-evaluate" you every so often if you're working at all. You are not being singled out - I assure you. I've been routinely "re-evaluated" without a problem (working part-time as a tutor), and I fully expect it to happen over and over again until I die.

Finally, in my last marriage, I had a wonderful step-daughter who got arrested for marijuana possession (before it was legalized). Her mother was livid, but I talked some sense into her. Marajuana is relatively harmless and nearly all young people these days smoke it - especially now that it's legal. I'm sorry if other parents disagree, but I don't think it's a big deal. After all, when I was young, I drank millions of gallons of beer at parties, and despite it all, I'm didn't graduate to any hard drugs or degenerate into a skid row bum. Please relax and take a deep breath.

[littlemiss44]

Thank you outlaw sammy. You made me feel better about both subjects. When I raised my children I told them that drugs are wrong...but I said that if you choose to try one don't do anything else but pot cause anything else cam kill you which is true. I shouldn't blame my bp as to why she tried it. Thank you for yr kind advice.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk

[grandmaof3]

My teenage daughter has been very challenging. She smoked pot for awhile, she became pregnant at 14 .... I could go on and on. I wonder too if growing up with a bipolar mother affected her behavior. Parenting a teen is hard even for so called "normal" people.

[r010159]

I have not been formally reviewed by SSDI for as long as I have been on it, 15 years. One letter came to me stating that I was about to be reviewed. Then another letter came telling me to ignore the first letter. I think this is a little goofy.

I think all you need is to have your doctor support the decision to stay on SSDI because you cannot hold down a job. It would help to get this in writing. I think this will help out allot.

[Trippin2.0]

There are wayyy worse things than pot.

I smoked it as a teenager too, and guess what?
I didn't even have the "wrong crowd" of friends... it was just us good kids, with good grades, wanting to try something new.

And when I was done with HS, my experimenting phase was done too.

Its not always a big deal, so I would encourage you to actually LISTEN to your daughter's side of the story, ie, why does she smoke, where, who with and how often...

Then decide if her behaviour is actually worrying...

[littlemiss44]

My daughter and I did have an excellent talk about her pot use. She says it eases her social anxiety and anxiety in general. She is a good girl who wanted to try it. Problem is that wasn't her first time she got caught. She has a great therapist who specializes in adolescent substance use so she will be very helpful. My daughter loves her therapist so this should be a positive outcome. As far as the ssd thing I think my number is just up for reconsideration. I work a pt job and I think they want to know about that even tho yr allowed to work pt while on ssd. I think it will be ok cause my pdoc and I talked about it. He said he sees it happening all the time and that I am severely mi so I should have nothing to worry about but I still do cause it's my lively hood. I don't know what I'd do without it. Thx guys for taking the time to write back to me. You give me peace of mind.

Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk