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#1
Apr 30, 2014, 11:26 PM
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I've been feeling so bad the last few days...really bad. Tonight I si for the first time in over a year. I thought I could handle this one but I can't do it on my own.
I'm so worried and frustrated. How can I be on 5 meds and still feel this way. Today was extremely stressful and I think that prompted this need for the hospital. My bf had to take the razors away from me and I'm thankful he came in when he did. This is even more stressful because I was suppose to return to work this weekend after being out for back surgery. Now I have to tell my work that I had to go to the hospital. I don't want to tell them why. How would you guys handle telling an employer that you were in the psych ward? I mean I can probably get a general drs note that will not mention the psych ward but I'm not too sure. I wish I felt better. God do I do more than anything. God please help me. Sent from my SGH-M919 using Tapatalk |
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#2
Apr 30, 2014, 11:39 PM
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Sounds like the stress of going back to work has taken it's toll on you also.....it could be that stress is what drove you to the SI in the first place again & then to the point of needing to be in the hospital.....maybe you need to work on what is so stressful to you about going back to work?
__________________
 Leo's favorite place was in the passenger seat of my truck. We went everywhere together like this. Leo my soulmate will live in my heart FOREVER Nov 1, 2002 - Dec 16, 2018 |
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#3
Apr 30, 2014, 11:50 PM
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Well what you said makes sense but it still doesn't explain why I'd self harm over it. When I have too much on my plate my symptoms break right thru. I've been on lamictal for 10 years abd I don't feel like it's doing its job. I was depressed after surgery too. My anti anxiety med neurontin doesn't do Jack for me. I shouldn't be popping a xanex everyday to ease my anxiety either. My teenage daughter and I really got into it today and I harmfully raged at her. I mean real rage where I scared the living **** out of her. She hid out in the bathroom till I unlocked it. All these events shouldn't distregulate me so much. I should be able to handle things much more calmly. I really am in the pity pot of hating myself right now. Feels horrible.
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#4
May 01, 2014, 12:33 AM
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 it takes so many slips to figure out why you Self harm. Be proud that you made it so long. It sounds like you didn't get your meds adjusted for the surgery. I'd just try to get a letter saying you were in the hospital because of complications from your surgery. Do you have a therapist you can call?
__________________
Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#5
May 01, 2014, 07:05 AM
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Ya I have a therapy appt today at 10am. They decided not to admit me which is probably best. Yes my pain meds really affected my mood I found out and I'm still on them. I need to be on them for a few more months. I still have residual pain. I want off them but I can't yet. The hospital wants me to do their intensive outpatient groups so I should probably do that. I.just wish I could have a new brain...I think I'm on the pity.pot right now and that is not a good place to be. I work very hard at not feeling sorry for myself. There are just some days where I do and I guess that's ok. Thx for all yr kind words.
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