[pawn78]

I'm up late, can't sleep due to a cold. So I will be short.

Bipolar type 1 dad, I was diagnosed as depressed, possibly bipolar at age 19 after a psychedelic induced psychotic episode.

Then I seemed to get better, got a career and fell in love, life was good.

About 10 years later, I kids and went through a bankruptcy, went totally manic, psychotic and was diagnosed as bipolar type 1. Prescribed Depakote. I soon went off the meds, because I believed I would be healed by god, and that meds wouldn't help.

A year later, I was pretty depressed and tried Lamictal. That seemed to diverge trick for me, I was fairly calm, stable. I again thought I was healed by god and quit the meds and quit therapy.

In 2013, I had a epiphany that my religion and my faith was delusional.... My beliefs didn't match up with reality and my entire lifetime of faith in the supernatural came crashing down... This was a good thing for me because my delusional beliefs basically disappeared overnight! The downside of course to my new "atheist" mind, was that I no longer had the hope and comfort that a "god" was watching over me and healing me.... I am again struggling with depression, and lately it's just a lot if irritability and rapid cycling mixed stuff, but so far no extremes.

I started seeing a new Pdoc, he does psychotherapy as well as meds. I started the Lamictal again today... Of course, it will be several weeks before I know if it helps, but I am hopeful.



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[Happy Camper]

I went through a religious/spiritual awakening and was trying to decipher hints and clues from god, but I decided that it was delusional. I didn't want to give it all up, so I decided to limit myself and just not try to figure out the specifics of it (which is really what causes a person to unravel).

[pawn78]

It's a huge step for me to accept my diagnosis fully and accept that I need medication/therapy.

Never before have I had the clear thinking to seek professional help properly, I always resisted, doubted the diagnosis, etc.

I just hope the Lamictal does help again this time, but I have to beg patient.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[pawn78]

Today was good. Started out poorly, as I have a bad cough/ cold that left me sleepless most of the night.

However, I managed the daily stress well and even had a great, intimate evening with the wife.

Feeling good right now.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[BioAdoptMom3]

Welcome to the group ! I am glad you got back on meds and am encouraged that you will once again be doing therapy!

Nancy

[outlaw sammy]

[quote=pawn78;3751172]I'm up late, can't sleep due to a cold. So I will be short. . . . but I am hopeful.

I love your honesty! And in spite of the fact that I'm devotely religious, by your description of religious beliefs leading you to believe that God would substitute for sound psychiatric treatment (psychotropic medications), perhaps you were delusional. Less than a month ago, a woman with diabetes in my apartment building died of complications of her illness - but she didn't have to die. She had chosen to abandon her insulin shots, because her faith in God would heal her.

Now I say that God provides us with the tools not only to live our lives, but to prosper. Why would you dig a garden with your hands, when there's a shovel in the toolshed? Better yet, why would you hang out at the bar waiting for God to plant your garden?

I believe it was the great American poet and writer, C.W. Lewis who wrote, "An atheist cannot find God anymore than a burglar can find a policeman."

May I recommend that you try once again to seek Him out.

Baruch Tihiye (Blessed you will be)

[pawn78]

Faith is helpful for some people, so I am not trying to deconvert anyone... But for me it was detrimental... I believe in science, knowledge, no more fairytales and myths for me thanks.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[pawn78]

[QUOTE=outlaw sammy;3753689]

Originally Posted by pawn78

I'm up late, can't sleep due to a cold. So I will be short. . . . but I am hopeful.

I love your honesty! And in spite of the fact that I'm devotely religious, by your description of religious beliefs leading you to believe that God would substitute for sound psychiatric treatment (psychotropic medications), perhaps you were delusional. Less than a month ago, a woman with diabetes in my apartment building died of complications of her illness - but she didn't have to die. She had chosen to abandon her insulin shots, because her faith in God would heal her.

Now I say that God provides us with the tools not only to live our lives, but to prosper. Why would you dig a garden with your hands, when there's a shovel in the toolshed? Better yet, why would you hang out at the bar waiting for God to plant your garden?

I believe it was the great American poet and writer, C.W. Lewis who wrote, "An atheist cannot find God anymore than a burglar can find a policeman."

May I recommend that you try once again to seek Him out.

Baruch Tihiye (Blessed you will be)

The god of the bible didn't need any meds to heal people... He could raise the dead! Too bad he's not real, just a fictional character like Aslan in CS Lewis' fiction.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk