[Mamabug1981]

This is what I was afraid was going to happen. My depression manifests as tearfulness and aggression. Like, I scare people when I'm down I'm so aggressive. When my primary care put me on the Geodon last week, she told me to stop the Celexa I was taking. I was fine til today, when I realized the teary feeling was back. That means that horribly losing my temper at someone is not far behind, a day or two at most. Thoughts of suicide will show up in another week or so. But I still have the up energy and insomnia and overspending of the hypomania, though the paranoia that helped get me diagnosed is mostly gone. Guess this is what a mixed episode feels like. It's not bad yet, but it WILL get there. If there's one end of this illness I know well, it's the depression and how I experience it.

She told me to call her if I started feeling like this, as I expressed my concern about dropping the AD before seeing the psych when we talked. I know she counseled me to stop it because of the potential drug interactions, but I'd rather risk that than feel like this. Looks like I get to call in the morning.

[Skitz13]

Originally Posted by Mamabug1981

This is what I was afraid was going to happen. My depression manifests as tearfulness and aggression. Like, I scare people when I'm down I'm so aggressive. When my primary care put me on the Geodon last week, she told me to stop the Celexa I was taking. I was fine til today, when I realized the teary feeling was back. That means that horribly losing my temper at someone is not far behind, a day or two at most. Thoughts of suicide will show up in another week or so. But I still have the up energy and insomnia and overspending of the hypomania, though the paranoia that helped get me diagnosed is mostly gone. Guess this is what a mixed episode feels like. It's not bad yet, but it WILL get there. If there's one end of this illness I know well, it's the depression and how I experience it.

She told me to call her if I started feeling like this, as I expressed my concern about dropping the AD before seeing the psych when we talked. I know she counseled me to stop it because of the potential drug interactions, but I'd rather risk that than feel like this. Looks like I get to call in the morning.

Sounds like you should make that call. Mixed episodes are the worst, they really are. Like you I know my illness enough that I know what to expect. I had started with a pdoc a few months ago when I was in the depths of a mixed episode and I told her what was to come and she didn't believe me. Well...she certainly listens to me now.

My medications have a lot of interactions but my pdoc is ok with it but is watching me closely. I have no intentions on changing up my medications at this point. I just think everything should stay the same for awhile, maybe 3 months to see if this cocktail will work.

[Mamabug1981]

I did call, go figure my doctor is out of town til Monday. I started crying on the phone, and at one point they were trying to convince me to come in for a screening to make sure I wasn't going to hurt myself. I managed to assure them I wasn't to that point yet, and requesting to go back on the Celexa was to avoid getting to that point. My doctor's fill-in will be in tomorrow though, so they agreed to send a message to that doctor so I could at least talk to someone about the meds. I just want something to get me through til my appointment with the psych.

And now I'm sure I've either hit a mixed episode or flipped entirely. I had someone (very kindly and respectfully at least) call me out on the body odor thing tonight. While I was with her I was able to just smile and nod and yes, it's a medical thing, and yes, I've learned adaptations over the years. As soon as we parted I was sobbing the whole drive home. Then I got home with my hubby and I was back to "normal" silly me. And now just recounting it has me tearing up again. This sucks so bad.

[Mamabug1981]

Missed the doctor's call-back today. But when I called the office and they checked my chart, they said the doc called in a prescription for the Celexa. I didn't need the script as I still have enough to get me through, but I'm going to take that as permission to go back on it! That makes me so much more comfortable about navigating the next 2 weeks til I have my intake appt with the psych!

[VoiceOfChrysalis]

I'm glad to hear the fill-in doc okayed you going back on the Celexa. I don't know of any interactions specifically between Geodon and SSRIs, so I'm not really sure why your pdoc took you off it in the first place.

I wish you the best in evading a depressive episode. (((hugs)))

[Cocosurviving]

I'm also glad things turned out fine for you. Mixed is terrible I know first hand.

Sent from iPhone using Tapatalk

[cashart10]

I'm so glad things worked out and hope you are feeling back to yourself right away.

[Mamabug1981]

Originally Posted by VoiceOfChrysalis

I'm glad to hear the fill-in doc okayed you going back on the Celexa. I don't know of any interactions specifically between Geodon and SSRIs, so I'm not really sure why your pdoc took you off it in the first place.

I wish you the best in evading a depressive episode. (((hugs)))

As I understand it, combining ADs and APs can cause QT prolongation, a heart arrhythmia. At least that's what the patient insert for my Geodon said.

[BipolaRNurse]

I've taken Geodon and Celexa for a year-and-a-half and have never had an issue with my heart, although I do know about the warnings regarding QT prolongation. I'm concerned that the doc yanked you off the Celexa without tapering it first. My experience with coming off even 10 mg was miserable.....tried it twice, once while manic, and I was a pissed-off, irritable, tearful bundle of anxiety triple-dipped in psycho.

So now I'm on 5 mg forevermore, which is basically just to prevent withdrawal. Higher doses tend to encourage the development of manic episodes, and I'm on enough mood stabilizers to hold back the worst of the depression anyway so the sub-therapeutic dose is basically a place-holder in my med regimen.

Hope things turn around for you soon.

[Mamabug1981]

To be fair, we did taper off, over the course of a week. But I was on a pretty low dose to begin with (20mg/day) that even tapering was as good as going off entirely, and my symptoms cropped back up within a couple days of the end of the taper.

[Love&Toil]

How are you doing today Mamabug?

[Mamabug1981]

Not as weepy. Still a bit down, but it'll take time for the AD to build back up in my system. I can already feel though that going back on it was the right decision. 2 weeks left til my intake with the psych, just have to survive that long.

Caught myself having a full out back and forth argument with... myself. That was weird. That was on Friday when I was at my worst. Def something to talk to the psych about though.

[BipolaRNurse]

Originally Posted by Mamabug1981

To be fair, we did taper off, over the course of a week. But I was on a pretty low dose to begin with (20mg/day) that even tapering was as good as going off entirely, and my symptoms cropped back up within a couple days of the end of the taper.

That's way too quick. Tapering should be gradual, over the course of weeks or even months depending on how long you were on it. I'm sorry that happened to you.

[Mamabug1981]

Originally Posted by BipolaRNurse

That's way too quick. Tapering should be gradual, over the course of weeks or even months depending on how long you were on it. I'm sorry that happened to you.

Yeah, she took me from the 20mg I was taking to 10 for a week then off. I was on it for about 6 months. Maybe she was expecting the Geodon to have more of an effect on the low end than it does currently. But this switch to the bipolar diagnosis has her completely out of her element, first time I've ever seen her have to consult with another doctor (the psych in this case) before prescribing me something instead of just discussing it with me (I've usually thoroughly researched my options and just ask for something specific, and 9 times out of 10 she agrees it's the right thing) and prescribing it. She's already said she's not comfortable treating me for this, and that while I can continue to receive my general health care from her, the mental health stuff all needs to go through the psych now.

While I'm feeling better now that I'm back on the AD, I can already tell this specific combo (Celexa and Geodon) is NOT going to work for me long term. I'm getting a lot of the walk into the room and forget why stuff, even just sitting in my chair and thinking I need to do something, then the next second can't remember what it was, just that I was going to do something. Or like last night I was repeatedly looking at the color yellow and automatically calling it green. I could NOT make myself call it yellow for about 10 minutes. And I have it in my head right now that this one girl on the cast of the show I'm in is out to get me kicked out of the company, though I know that's (probably) not true. Though she really doesn't seem to like me at all, her or her crony... I get along with the rest of the cast and the directors just fine. And I'm losing control of my brain-mouth filter.

[cashart10]

Hi Mamabug!

Some of the thoughts and beliefs you are experiencing may be delusional. Please contact your doctor again right away. Hopefully your doc can get in touch with your psych but either way please tell your doc exactly what you have written here. I hope you are feeling back to yourself soon!

[Mamabug1981]

Originally Posted by cashart10

Hi Mamabug!

Some of the thoughts and beliefs you are experiencing may be delusional. Please contact your doctor again right away. Hopefully your doc can get in touch with your psych but either way please tell your doc exactly what you have written here. I hope you are feeling back to yourself soon!

So far I can still recognize that they're exactly that, delusions, and push them to the side. I check in with my husband daily on what's going on in my head, and he's tasked with letting me know when I stop recognizing it. I've never truly lost touch with reality in the past. I have 12 days left til my intake. 99% of the time I'm fine, no delusions or thoughts. I do plan to print out what I wrote to take to the appointment as an example of my behavior though.

[cashart10]

That's wonderful. I'm glad you still perceive reality and that you have a safety check in place. I hope everything goes well at your appointment.