[Victoria'smom]

My husband doesn't want to leave the area for another month. This means I'd have to reschedual all of our Dr appointments, he discontinues both his heart meds and APs, and my son's schooling is illegal for another month. Plus I discontiued my ad/ap because ED flared. I don't plan to really start it so a therapist is probably needed soon.

The idea of seeing family and friends a bit longer is appealing to me. Plus I'm not 100% sure I'll get Medicaid in my new state being homeless.

Any ideas besides really start AP/AD I'd rather be insane and starving then sain and eating. I know messed up thinking but it's mine. I'll only be here for 6weeks longer if I stay. I'm leaning towards staying.

[littlemiss1970]

What opinions are you asking for? I'm not sure what you need help with...

[BipolaRNurse]

It's a little hard on a fat person to hear someone say they'd rather be insane and thin than to be sane and look a little like.....me.

I feel awful about your situation. I know what it's like to be caught between a rock and a hard place; in fact I'm in one myself as we speak. I don't have to tell you, you know what I always say---"TAKE THE DAMN MEDS!!" LOL

Wishing you the best, no matter what you decide to do. (((HUGS)))

[Victoria'smom]

Would you go to the new state hoping you could get assistance to have your psych team and meds earlier or would you stay in the area you can visit friends and family longer given you're not likely to see them for a couple of years? Any other opinions also like if we choose to stay is there any temporary services?

I know some of what we're doing is risky and we don't want to end up in the hospital so grounding techniques, alternatives, pretty much anything and above anything honesty.

[Victoria'smom]

insane and thin bp nurse it's not about becoming fat. In my head I'm a good 450+ lbs. So I'm kinda already there in my mind. Which includes all the fears associated with being that big. I literally do not want to put anything in my body and viibryd requires me to eat and get hungry. When i know if I don't take it my intake will be about 2oz of liquid a day to take my lamictal in less than a week. It's day three and I'm down to 1/4 of a sandwich.

So it's not that I'll get morbidly obese because I'm already there.

[BipolaRNurse]

Not being in your situation or knowing you other than from here at PC, I'm having a hard time trying to advise you. But as a nurse, I have always operated under the principle of what is the SAFEST choice, and I think the safest choice is to be where the services are. You all need them desperately, and I am afraid things will not go well for you if you delay your move to the new state. JMHO.

[Victoria'smom]

I Talked to my husband. He reminded me of how high of a standard i hold myself to when I promise things. I promised T if I refuse all food/drink for two days I would voluntarily hospitalize myself to quickly control my episode. He got me under the technicality I never said (nor would I have said) solely under her care. I can't do that without the viibryd so back on the viibryd i go, grr. I hate when he does crap like that.

I do agree if we are able to get insurance while homeless we need to go but we will stay in the area right up until the appointment. Now to figure out insurance. It would be so much easier if i could set up a poll. Besides my son's picking is getting bad.