[Newbie12]

She's been on meds for a couple years. She has moved fast in every relationship except her last. She's bisexual and her last relationship was with a woman. The woman was pregnant and married when they met. They were together for 6 years. My nephew, called my sister Mama and his birth mother Mommy. He called all of us auntie and my daughter knows him as her cousin.

A little background, my LS never had a relationship over 2 yrs before this. Every relationship, even in HS, she found online. She moved fm CA to TX for a guy she'd never met in person. She moved in with him and said yes to marrying him. I threw her a going away party and all that [our older sis married a Marine and lived in SC]. She was 17 then, now 29. I'm 3 1/2 yrs older. Anyway, it lasted a year, she blamed him even though she found his replacement online in our hometown, so she moved back home. That guy was nice and he was ok with her experimenting with girls (whom she met on CL). I'm not knocking online dating at all. I know people who have been married for years and they met online. I understand her co-dependence. Now she broke things off with her girlfriend and is dating a Sherriff's deputy she met online, 7 weeks ago right before she broke up with her girlfriend, and basically her stepson. She convinced everyone it would be better that way. He knows her as or of his mom's. Poor guy is probably heart broken. I know my little family is. But my LS didn't have the courtesy to tell me they broke up and we were out a cousin and nephew. Ugh, I feel like contacting his mom and seeing if we can have play dates.

My LS even slept w/my HS boyfriend when he was 18, she was 14 but that's a whole other can of worms.

The thing is, when she goes through this little cycle, and I believe it's her manic stage, even worse with this guy. She said he's saying that he want to marry her and have kids and so does she. Maybe they are madly in love after 7 weeks. But she has been super manic every time. She also said she doesn't know why she's taking the Lamictal because she feels fine.

Also, she hasn't told him she's Bipolar, GAD, like a cancer patient aenemic. If he really does love her like she says, I think she would have told him. She also said she didn't want to tell him because she takes meds that he arrests people for. Wth. She has scrips. She's irrational. She's a nurse for crying out loud.

Anyway, she sounded offended and changed the subject quick when I told her it's unfair not to tell him.

What do you think, opinions, theories?

[~Christina]

Well ... If she is living her life and doesn't think there is a problem then there is not much you can really do about to be honest..Its up to her to disclose her illness to any of her partners , yes they have a right to know but its her decision.

Lamictal is a mood stabilizer but its just not enough for some people to manage there own unique brand of Bipolar. Maybe she is on other medications that your not aware of ?

I know you feel bad about the lost contact with the little boy.. But in all fairness keeping up visits and what not is probably not in the best interest of the child.

I guess the best advice I can say is just offer support when/if you can . The last thing a Bipolar person responds to is being told what to do when they are manic. Sad but true.

I wish you the best

[Newbie12]

She also mentioned stopping Lamictal. I just told her I didn't think it was a good idea. If she can't feel it, just pretend it's a sugar pill and take with her other meds.

[Newbie12]

It's like watching a tornado, and just like a tornado, you can't stop it. I love her. I know she loves me but she also lacks empathy so the damage path is hard to take sometimes. I feel bad for people I barely know sometimes.

It's very frustrating knowing deep inside that there's nothing you can do and plus I feel like a hypocrite because I've done different things but they seem worse. If she were an F5 then I'm an F3, mine just stays on the ground longer.

Do either of those make sense on the bipolar spectrum?

[~Christina]

Yeah thats about all your able to do .. Alot of Bipolar folks stop medications often, its just part of the illness.

[~Christina]

Yes it all sounds like Bipolar but of course no one here can diagnose. While supporting her you also need to keep in mind that your own mental well being needs to be looked after also.. You love her but dont let her pull you down.

[Victoria'smom]

Your LS ex needs to be contacted. Just so she knows her and her son will always be part of the family. Yes if she does stay with this person they'll realize eventually but by no means should he know.

[Newbie12]

On, she knows she's bipolar and has an official diagnosis, she just doesn't understand it completely. IMO, if you don't understand your bipolar disorder, it's like you don't have it. That or she's in deep denial. But she's had her diagnosis for about 6 yrs.

It's just, she's 29 years old, she's known about if a long time. And she's shamed of of it. I firmly believe he needs to know if he's telling her he wants to marry her and she's telling him. It's like trapping him. Some people can't handle bipolar disorder partners.

[Victoria'smom]

I don't feel having a name to it will help her partner yet. It's kinda a joke in my family that my younger sister is the only one not Dx because she out right refuse pdocs. Neither of my sister's take meds. So when a new "toy" comes around long enough that they make stick around. I like to tell them be carful having kids bipolar runs in families. That lets the guy/girl have a heads up and ask questions but doesn't over step my boundaries.