[tracy33]

Lately I've noticed that I don't pay attention very well. My husband will talk to me, usually about the stock market, which I have no clue about, and I just nod my head as if I'm interested when actually I'm in my own little world thinking about myself. He talks about it constantly and I cannot take it. I feel so dumb because I don't want to take the time to learn any of it either. I feel like I don't have the power in my brain to learn. Whenever people talk to me and the conversation gets boring, I start to think about myself and what I'd rather be doing and so on. I even let my mind wander during my group therapy for drug and alcohol addictions and for my regular therapy as well.
I think, I know, it's the meds. I'm an intelligent person. But nowadays I chose not to be. It's like I can't control it, but my brain wants to be lazy. I don't want to learn anything new. It all seems so hard. I have to read things over and over again to understand them. I really have to think sometimes before I speak otherwise I won't make sense, the words won't come out right.
I hope I am making sense now to someone out there. My mind is just a big ball of confusion.
What makes matters worse is that my husband called me a dumb *** today because I want to stay on my Topamax (dopamax) even though it's making me like this. You see, it's the only drug that has really leveled my moods. And I lost alot of weight from it and I am afraid if I go off it or lower the dose that I will gain weight. I am SO afraid of that.
My current meds are Topamax 125mg., Lamictal 300mg., Abilify10mg., and Welbutrin 300mg. I just started the Welbutrin several months ago and that's really when I started noticing this behavior, although I have read that Topamax makes you "stupid" so to speak.
I wouldn't mind a decrease in any of the meds, just not the Topamax.
Does anyone else have the "stupids" like I do?? And what meds do you take? And do you think it is caused by the meds?
I'm on disability for my bipolar, so thankfully I don't have to deal with the public much.
I'd appreciate any of your input.

[bizi]

First off your husband needs a kick in the pants!
I too have heard that people taking topamax have very serious problems with memory "normal" language issues.
Have you thought about using the lamictal alone....it too has antidepressant qualities, I take 200mg.
this is what I take and I am bipolar 1.
I also take geodon, 40mg at night... both of these meds are weight neutral. the geodon could replace the abilify(which maybe a weight gainer...don't know)...and lastly I take .5mg of klonipin to sleep.
I have been stable on this med combo for quite a while now thankfully.

I can sympathize with you lazy brain...I am resistant to try new activities, kind of like my rut but am venturing out these days...jsut this past thursday i went kayaking ! it was a lot of fun!
bizi

[Razzleberry]

I'm not much help for your actual question, but I'm just curious how much weight you lost with Topamax? I've been too chicken to ask my pdoc for that med just because I want to lose weight. I'm also on Lamictal right now, I didn't know you could take both Lamictal and Topamax at the same time..hmm. I'm on Zyprexa which works wonders but has the WORST weight gain of nearly any drug on the market.

[Perzephone]

I think everyone, whether on meds or not, tends to drift off when someone is talking about a subject they're not interested in, especially when it's something they constantly yammer about. I try to be an 'active' listener, but sometimes my husband gets on these tangents about things he invents in his head but never takes any action on, and he rambles about specifications and applications of these inventions.... and I'm off in la-la land, chiming in w/the obligatory 'Yes dear', 'That's a good idea, dear'... Of course, sometimes he catches onto the fact that I am not paying him any attention & will say something off-the-wall like, "So, are we going to have **** sex tonight?" to which I automatically reply, "Yes, dear".

Now, as far as your husband actually calling you 'dumb' - I'd kick his ***. It is hurtful, disrespectful and just mean. Instead of letting him ramble on, let him know that you aren't interested in the stock market or global economics - and if you want conversation, find a topic you can focus on or let him know that you aren't in a frame of mind for talking.

[multipixie9]

name calling is completely inappropriate and your husband's behavior makes me want to do something inappropriate too!

you guys need to talk about talking - there's only so much technical talk anyone can actually listen to and then the eyes begin to glaze and the mind takes a hike.

i would talk to your pdoc about ALL the things happening to you. it could be the wellbutrin making a problem due to the combination of meds. plus just tell doc you want to stay on topamax if at all possible - but the doc is there to help you with mind and body! last year i got put on wellbutrin along with cymbalta and elavil (i'm not bipolar) and i began to have scary tremors and parkinson type symptoms. so, i had to drop the wellbutrin and it went away 99.9% of time...

one last thought, you need to stop name-calling yourself. how can your husband respect you if you refuse to respect yourself. you are NOT dumb. you are perfectly fine by the way you express yourself in writing - you are just having some symptoms that make you FEEL unintelligent!!! ok, off the soap box for now. take care!