[wildflowerchild25]

I feel like I am very slowly starting to come out of the depression. I thought it was going to switch into hypomania on Thursday but it didn't stay. It seems my body has recovered in that I have energy back to do things but my mins hasn't recovered yet. I still have no desire to do anything, which unfortunately is leaving me very restless and bored, giving me thoughts of self harm. I think it gets worse before it gets better.

Of course I was hoping the AD would kick off hypomania but I think the invega will take care of that. And I guess I don't really want that anyway. I can only ever see the roses, not the thorns, and I don't want the thorns. I need to learn to be happy in the middle (assuming I get there).

It's nice not to dread getting up out of bed but I don't quite want to do the things I'm supposed to do either. I feel fragile, like I've just been through something terrible and I'm not yet ready to face the harsh lights of the world - which in a sense is true.

The last time I came out of the depression I never quite made it out of this fragile state so I hope this time I can make it further.

Does anyone else get like this? When coming out of depression (as a result of medication) you just feel tired and beaten down? Like you're standing on new legs?

[Hopeful Camel]

Hi Wildflowerchild, I know that fragile place all too well. It is hard, too, when you feel like you might easily slip back into the depression. You want to be careful with yourself. I think that is where the feeling of fragility comes from.

As you know, I'm in the thick of the depression right now, so don't have a lot to share with you. I just want to say that taking care of yourself when you are feeling fragile is SO important. I know I sometimes try to power through my fragile places. I think it is better to listen to our selves. Listen to our own place of knowing and awareness.

I'm glad you are on the upswing. Albeit slowly. Sometimes the slower recovery is the more lasting.