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#1
Oct 18, 2014, 11:04 PM
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I have been having a really hard time lately. In fact if I look back on my life I realize that I have always had a hard time. I born with a bone disability and because of it I have suffered from chronic pain my whole life. When I got older I was diagnosed with bipolar.
Today I had the thought that maybe I am to damaged to live a life that I will be happy with. Maybe all the PTSD, chronic pain, bipolar, 14 surgeries, personality breaks and hospital stays will always force me to have to pay catch up. What if I will have to live the rest of my life being content with my life only being good enough. This thought has haunted me all day. I know that my disability and bipolar will be a life long struggle. I am so afraid that I will never get to move on and do what I want to do. I am so afraid that I am going to have to miss out on even more of life. I am not really even sure how I will be able to support myself financially, physically and mentally. Mentally and physically I am so tired. This struggle has taken a huge toll on me. I currently cant work, drive or go to school because of my disability. I am forced to live with my mother because I have no were else to go. My mother drops hints every day that I should move out and give her the space she wants from motherhood. I would love to live away from my mother, she treats me horrible. Sadly I don't have anywhere else to go. I don't know what I will do now.... or in the future.
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"Life isn't about finding yourself, its about creating yourself" |
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#2
Oct 18, 2014, 11:18 PM
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How old are you? would you be able to go to school if you lived on campus?
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Dx: Me- SzA Husband- Bipolar 1 Daughter- mood disorder+ Comfortable broken and happy "So I don't know why I'm tongue tied At the wrong time when I need this."- P!nk My blog |
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#3
Oct 18, 2014, 11:27 PM
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apply for SSI this will give u money to allow u to get out and live where u want ......as for schooling if u have a computer u have school they offer free things all over the net and if there is a subject or something u want to really do then start learning aspects of that subject from the start
as for your mom tell her u want me out then give me a hand filing for this and getting all the forms in the sooner this goes tho the faster i can leave give u post 18 space as u want .......i love u thanks for letting me live here and helping me but stop kicking me while i am done sorry i got fight in me say what u need to but u get the idea |
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