[THE16THDOCTOR]

I don't understand. I just feel so down and it's hard to get going at times I just want to lay in bed. I have nothing to be depressed about I just feel so down. And my anxiety has increased a bit but same thing my life has been going well. I'm so frustrated I feel like I should feel better and happy there's no reason for this. Does anyone else feel this way or are there specific reasons you get depressed or anxious. Bc I just comes on for me.

[newtothis31]

I get that same feeling. It definitely seems to be triggered by some daily stressors- but I feel so guilty for being depressed since I'm so fortunate. Part of it is my personality- I always strive to be at my best and I get frustrated when I don't meet overly high expectations. Part of me thinks that if I could adjust my outlook to just let myself be content- it would be easier but depression has a physical toll that it takes as well.

[wildflowerchild25]

Generally depression for me just shows up. At least it seems to. Sometimes I can figure out triggers but a lot of the time there's no reason for it. I've been depressed now for awhile but this time it was probably triggered by my husband admitting his drug problem to me.

It is frustrating for me too.

[deedee7]

I can so relate to this. I know exactly what circumstantial depression looks like and feels like. For a long time that is mainly what my depression was, but I know it would last longer than it should and was very painful. However, at this point in my life, there is absolutely no reason for me to be depressed, which I think makes it worse. It doesn't make sense to me and certainly not to people around me. "What's wrong?" they ask. The answer is very simply - "Nothing is wrong….I have a mental illness that results in periods of bone crushing depression.

Even with the meds and great self care, it still happens, and it is happening right now. I try very hard to stay in the moment and try to get through each day as best I can. When I just take it one day at a time, I am better. When I think about the future I get very scared because I can't imagine having these episodes for the next 40 years. Then I get crazy and I think of things I can do to not live too long. I have even pondered taking up smoking, which is crazy.

Anyway, I think this is just part of the disease and I need to be very grateful that I don't have impossible circumstances to deal with as well as the clinical depression.

Hang in there….it's all we can really do.

[Capriciousness]

Originally Posted by THE16THDOCTOR

I don't understand. I just feel so down and it's hard to get going at times I just want to lay in bed. I have nothing to be depressed about I just feel so down. And my anxiety has increased a bit but same thing my life has been going well. I'm so frustrated I feel like I should feel better and happy there's no reason for this. Does anyone else feel this way or are there specific reasons you get depressed or anxious. Bc I just comes on for me.

Dude, that is the way I feel every depression.

The way I see it that is the real mental "illness". As I said to a friend once I think that your regular run of the mill situational depression is like "my life is such a mess. I just want it to be over". But a Bipolar chemical depression can be like "my life is so wonderful. I just wish it was over I can't stand it. WTF!!???"

Obviously this is a huge over simplification but it has helped friends understand that it isn't the circumstances that are the issue. (Though they certainly can trigger blah blah blah)

[~Christina]

Are you working with your Pdoc to see if med changes are needed? Sometimes even a dose change could be helpful.. Are you getting enough sunlight? vitamin D ? yeah all that healthy coping self care skills ?

Bipolar can just pops up and slap us down at times and no reason we are able to figure out.

I hope relief finds you soon .

[BlackSheep79]

Most of the time I just wake up and I'm severely depressed for no reason and it lasts almost ever time only for three days. This usually happens every 4-6 weeks. I usually end up missing 1-2 days of work. I always feel extreme guilt first because I know there are so many people that have it so much worse than me. I also feel guilty because my coworkers have to pick up the slack for me being gone. I haven't been able to pinpoint why this happens because it happens no matter what meds I'm on.

The16thdoctor you've been going thru a horrible time with the latuda. Don't you believe this all stems from that? I can't remember but weren't you afraid about the side effects coming back? I got the feeling from all of your posts thru this tough time that you were depressed and had anxiety before and now you are back to square one? This indeed is going to cause this for you.thats at least how I felt. I ended having to go back on seroquel which I went off of because it caused me to be pre-diabetic. I could be wrong I'm just guessing.

[4ALittle]

So thankful for this thread today.
I too have periods where I get extremely down and anxious and heap guilt on top of that. My life is generally very good. I feel like I have no right to be down. Apparently, the chemicals in my brain are not aware of just how good I've got it.
Hang in there and keep talking. It's great to know we're not alone.

[Crazy Hitch]

When I'm depressed I find my anxiety levels increase at the same time too.

Sometimes, my depression has been caused by external triggers that I can identify.

At other times it creeps up on me slowly and before I know it I'm surrounded by depression and I can't pinpoint why when everything else around me seems okay.

Be well and know that this shall pass.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

Originally Posted by ~Christina

Are you working with your Pdoc to see if med changes are needed? Sometimes even a dose change could be helpful.. Are you getting enough sunlight? vitamin D ? yeah all that healthy coping self care skills ?

Bipolar can just pops up and slap us down at times and no reason we are able to figure out.

I hope relief finds you soon .

No I'm not I see her in two weeks. Before the latuda I was fairly stable on my cocktail of lexapro and lamactil. I regret messing w it. I have been getting regular self care. Prob not as much sunlight as needed
Thank you so much.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

Originally Posted by BlackSheep79

Most of the time I just wake up and I'm severely depressed for no reason and it lasts almost ever time only for three days. This usually happens every 4-6 weeks. I usually end up missing 1-2 days of work. I always feel extreme guilt first because I know there are so many people that have it so much worse than me. I also feel guilty because my coworkers have to pick up the slack for me being gone. I haven't been able to pinpoint why this happens because it happens no matter what meds I'm on.

The16thdoctor you've been going thru a horrible time with the latuda. Don't you believe this all stems from that? I can't remember but weren't you afraid about the side effects coming back? I got the feeling from all of your posts thru this tough time that you were depressed and had anxiety before and now you are back to square one? This indeed is going to cause this for you.thats at least how I felt. I ended having to go back on seroquel which I went off of because it caused me to be pre-diabetic. I could be wrong I'm just guessing.

No you're right. The latuda started this downward spiral. I don't have anymore side effects from it. Just more sepression than I'm used to in a long while. I assume, hopefully, I'm just leveling out w my regular meds after the latuda. I never handle antipsychotics well. Whatever the side effects are I alwYs get them. Seroquel made me a zombie and felt hungover all the time. Thanks for your words. I hope you feel better too.

[BlackSheep79]

Originally Posted by THE16THDOCTOR

No you're right. The latuda started this downward spiral. I don't have anymore side effects from it. Just more sepression than I'm used to in a long while. I assume, hopefully, I'm just leveling out w my regular meds after the latuda. I never handle antipsychotics well. Whatever the side effects are I alwYs get them. Seroquel made me a zombie and felt hungover all the time. Thanks for your words. I hope you feel better too.

I understand what you mean about the side effects. I try to be positive when I try a new drug, but I either suffer from a side effect that I just can't bare. Plus I've been allergic to five of the antipsychotics already, my throat closes up. I had no other option I had to go back on the Seroquel and deal with taking diabetes medication. I know what you mean about the zombie effect, it's not fun. I have to drink some caffeine to snap out of it to make it to work. My pdoc doesn't like me consuming the caffeine but I've got to survive and make it to work.

What was your reason for trying the Latuda when you said the lamictal and lexapro was doing pretty good?

I wish you the best and hope you find the right combo to make you feel better.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

Originally Posted by BlackSheep79

I understand what you mean about the side effects. I try to be positive when I try a new drug, but I either suffer from a side effect that I just can't bare. Plus I've been allergic to five of the antipsychotics already, my throat closes up. I had no other option I had to go back on the Seroquel and deal with taking diabetes medication. I know what you mean about the zombie effect, it's not fun. I have to drink some caffeine to snap out of it to make it to work. My pdoc doesn't like me consuming the caffeine but I've got to survive and make it to work.


What was your reason for trying the Latuda when you said the lamictal and lexapro was doing pretty good?


I wish you the best and hope you find the right combo to make you feel better.

Yea mine hates it if I have caffeine too.
I was feeling depressed and I hadn't in a while so my dr said he the depression starts to increase let's make an adjustment first to catch it and gave me latuda. I wish I just kept my mouth shut. It wasn't even this bad. I have very slowly felt better than I did but def not great. I'm so annoyed at myself for starting this when I could have just rode out the depression quicker than now. I have a big vacation planned in abt three weeks and I'm terrified I won't feel better by then. This is ******** these meds just making things worse. Ugh. Thanks for the words.

[madness2meditation]

Yup, this matching meds to moods thing really sucks. Incredibly confusing. And its as if your mind is the psychiatrist's playground- lets try this and see what happens !!! There is something about it that I just simply hate.

[THE16THDOCTOR]

Originally Posted by madness2meditation

Yup, this matching meds to moods thing really sucks. Incredibly confusing. And its as if your mind is the psychiatrist's playground- lets try this and see what happens !!! There is something about it that I just simply hate.

I know I wish we all reacted the same way to meds so it's not this constant guessing game that causes more bad than good sometimes.