I am...

...SPENDING MORE MONEY (and the hubs doesn't know)!!!!!

Whether he knows or not the bills are going to come due!

Hypomania go away before I go broke.

Lol...I got a credit card for my favorite store that you can pay in store with cash with paperless billing. I got it covered. Now, if I can just figure out how to explain where all these clothes he's never seen are coming from and all of the ebay spending, we'd be good!

Do you think you should stop? Can you afford it?

YES and NO!

I just HAVE To have so much stuff right now. I just found the coolest snakeskin watch ($29) and snakeskin sandals ($15) (plus shipping $8) at New York & CO and pearl earrings ($10) on ebay. They were such good prices, how could I pass them up. Well, if I hadn't spent $600 to $700 on clothing, shoes, and accessories over the last month when we are flat broke (that's what credit cards are for, right?) it might have been affordable!

I actually REALLY need to stop but I've already thought of more things I need: a snakeskin wallet to match my purse and other said items, a Janis Joplin t shirt, and a white pair of extra large sunglasses. Trust me, it won't end there!

I am absolutely terrified of credit card debt. I don't like the thought of debt collection hassling me over the phone. I hate being on the phone with strangers.

Sorry about that! I don't really think that's what a credit card is for; I was just being sarcastic. I hate debt too (although for different reasons).

Right now I am on Ebay looking at a $320 hat. I know my life might end if I purchase it, ha! I think I won't buy it but reason does not have the best of me. I am soooo tempted!

Don't do it. just book mark the potential purchases and revisit them later

STOP SPENDING! It is going to bite you back very soon. I am glad you are having fun but am just worried about you as the consequences can be disastrous. If you want to stop spending I think it is time to let your hubby know, as he will find out anyway. Better h hears from you sooner than later hey. Take care.

Thank you. I know! I could cry!

Nah. Derby is over. No hats!

I am, right now, looking at pearl rings online and drooling to buy one. What's 60 more dollars, right? When will I regain self-control? I WILL NOT buy this ring. My husband got mad at me for going on a "spending spree" today and spending over $200...for my therapist and groceries. Are you kidding me? But, he is fed up and I understand why. A pearl ring would look so pretty on my finger though. It would help to define me...show people who I am. And, it would look really, really cool.

You don't need a ring to define you, you're too wonderful to be defined by a piece of jewelry or a hat or anything else like that.

Maybe it's time to get off the shopping websites.

Thank you! And yes, it is time to give it up. But (there's always a but), lately it has been an addiction, an unreasonable addiction. For instance, I just found THE pearl ring for me. It costs $130. I am afraid if I don't buy it now I won't get it. I have already received my mother's day/birthday present from my husband (we agreed that since I have spent so much on myself these would be my gifts) which means that the next holiday for buying is Christmas. I have to have THIS ring and I'm worried they won't still have it in December. I've thought about asking my husband to buy it and hold it until Christmas but he will probably kill me just for asking. He is so over it. How ridiculous do I sound? Because I know I am being ridiculous and sooooooo selfish!!! I don't usually spend money on myself at all, just on my kiddos. I have no idea what in the world has gotten into me.

Have you talked to your pdoc about this? Maybe there is something s/he can give you to bring you down from the rafters and stop spending. Is it a mania thing? I really do wish you all the best in fighting this.

I'm pretty sure I am in the midst of a nasty mixed episode. My sleep is very chaotic, my mind is racing and I'm up moving, full of energy but I am still suicidal (often dangerously so because of the energy) and am suddenly very weepy. I'm not sure if the spending is part of the mixed episode or if it's a self soothing technique now that I have energy but am still depressed. I think, most likely, it is impulsive spending from the episode.

I did mention the spending to my pdoc, and the erratic sleep, and the racing mind, and the still suicidal thoughts (in fact, I told him my therapist was adamant I went IP or at least IOP). That is when he made the decision to double my Lamictal from 400 MG to 800 MG and he also increased my Vyvanse (stimulant) from 35 MG to 50 MG which I understand can both perpetuate and worsen a mixed episode. I don't know.

Ross-Simons - Italian 9.5-10mm Cultured Pearl Ring in 18kt Bonded Gold and Sterling Silver - #198129

How do I pass this up?

Pretend it doesn't exist. If it is even possible. Distract yourself with something non-shopping related. Take care

This is really unhealthy spending. You need to delete your information from all of your online accounts and hand all of your cards over to your husband. This may be too blunt, but you're an adult who is aware that what you're doing is partially the result of a manic or mixed episode. I know it's difficult, but the responsible thing is to make sure you don't have access to any resources that will allow you to make these purchases while you're in an episode. You're perfectly capable of doing that, even while you're manic.

Thank you UCMATH! I feel so guilty and so sad about it (well, part of the time I do, like right now, and part of the time I am just needy and greedy). You are right and you aren't the first to suggest it. I should have done it weeks ago. I don't know why my husband didn't demand I hand them over...and now my mom is on my case about getting a good deterrent in place. She suggested I hand over my credit card and call someone every time I want to spend. The thing is I can't tell him or my mom about one of my credit cards; they (especially my husband) will be furious, truly furious. I can't handle that right now. I will shut down. Why CAN'T I be a grown up and just stop the spending? Today I did good. I spent money but only on what I needed. I had to run out for a second after I salivated over the stupid ring and I came home with a little more reason (although if I could, I would buy it in a flat second). And, now I am a guilty, blubbering idiot. I am going to hand over my regular credit card; I am going to have my husband remove paypal from Ebay, and I am going to think of a creative way to keep myself from spending on the store card that he is unaware of. I really will. I'll do it tomorrow.

Trouble in Mind Janis Joplin:



I'm going down; going down to the river.
I'm gonna bring along my rocking chair.
Hun and if the blues don't leave me,
Lord I'll have to run away from here.

Can you freeze the card you can't hand over? Just stick it in a container of water, freeze it and the next time you want to use it you have a deterrant that makes you wait and think about it before you can spend. (You need to use a container deep enough that it takes a while to melt it to get to the card). Or cut it up and forget you had it. I know that's hard but you need to be where you can't use the card at all.