Feeling pretty bad :\

Not doing so great today... I haven't slept well since two days. I'm having these obsessive thoughts all the time. Everytime something goes slightly wrong, I just turn it over in my head and can't let it go. That in turn leads to me getting angry, and then I feel sad. For example, yesterday I was upset at my flatmate for not being helpful, and got wound up about a minor criticism made by my boss. Both situations made me quite disoriented, and I wasn't able to recover for hours afterwards.

I'm super tired now, and I'm falling asleep in the middle of the day at work. All I can think about is shutting myself in at home. I would appreciate any advice and encouragement, guys...

do you have a therapist or psychiatrist?

I'm thinking we go through similar things. To me anxiety is a big component as well, causing me to worry, as you say, every time something goes slightly wrong. But at least you are recognizing your problems and here asking for help. Does your flatmate know that you're diagnosed bipolar and taking medication?

Hi guys, thanks for your replies.

@elevatedsoul I do have a psychiatrist. Do you think I should call at this stage? I was planning to see how it goes today and call tomorrow if things don't improve...

@SFVQ My flatmate does know, but I don't think she even recognized I was getting worked up. When I say I was upset, I was upset in private. Publicly I held it together. The ironic thing is that the actual issue affects my flat mate much more than it affects me because I'm moving soon, so it is totally ridiculous that she is not dealing with it. When I was told about the problem by our landlord, I just couldn't let it go in my head, and I was really frustrated that my flatmate was taking such a casual attitude about it... I feel really manipulated, but I guess it's because I'm getting worked up.

Actually, I'm generally frustrated that simple matters, even ones I could easily ignore, can be so utterly debilitating when I'm down. I'm getting worked up about being worked up right now...

yeah i think you should try to talk to your pdoc

it sounds like you are going through a rough period

im not a doctor so i cant give you medical advice but it sounds like you are very anxious and possibly manic

your pdoc should be helping you with that stuff... what meds do you take?

Can you increase your self care? Not sleeping well is the downfall for most all Bipolar folks.

Ruminating over things is a common response to any negative things happening in life, I have walked myself into a corner over some of the dumbest stuff, so I speak from first hand knowledge.

Are you able journal to get the thoughts outta your head ? that can be very helpful. Also exercise is another good way to burn off some negative self talk.

I hope you find ways to feel better.

Welcome to PC

@elevatedsoul Thanks, I'll give them a call tomorrow...

@~Christina thanks for the welcome! I'm still getting the hang of self help. Honestly, I've taken a pretty loose attitude to mental hygiene in the past. I joined the forum to improve. I'm a bit helpless when it comes to the ruminating. I'm only now realizing that I'm doing it quite often and how exhausting it is. I always assumed I was right to be angry and that my cyclic thoughts were fully proportional and balanced. Usually there is at least some element of truth even in the dumbest worries, and this would be enough to justify it to me in the heat of the moment. Recently, I've begun to notice it's happening with stuff I would regularly not care about at all, and how explosive and sudden my changes of mood are when it's happening. Buuuuh!