[nycboots]

Like many, I went for years undiagnosed and misdiagnosed for bipolar (about 20 years from when I first sought help... I think I've seen the average as 16?) I only went to doctors, both family practice and psychiatrists, when I felt down and depressed. They always would read questions off that standard battery they give for depression (Do you every have thoughts of killing yourself? Do you cry for no reason? Have you lost interest in activities you used to find enjoyable, etc., those type of questions.) Most of they time I was diagnosed with mild or moderate depression and prescribed lifestyle changes and talk therapy, and/or an antidepressant (those, naturally, made me bat-**** crazy, of course, and made me lose all faith in psychiatrists as you can imagine). Of course, I never went to a doctor when I was hypermanic or manic, nor did I go when I was severely depressed because then I wouldn't have been able to get out of the house. Heck, I couldn't even get out of bed in those times.

My perception has always been that bipolar depression tends much more toward severely decreased energy and mood, versus extreme sadness. I recently said that to my Pdoc, saying that those batteries that they used to give me were so ineffective at diagnosing anything real that was going on. He responded, "that's why I don't give them."

I am sure we have a range of experiences and was wondering what the experiences of others have been. If you could state 3-4 characteristics of your depressed states what would they be?

For me they would be:
1. extreme tiredness/lethargy/loss of energy
examples: feeling like a rock is on me, collapsing after work week and staying in bed all weekend to recover, just staying in bed in general

2. inability to get anything done/cannot face normal tasks
examples: all paperwork and bills piling up, doing no housework whatsoever, flunking out of grad classes because of completely stopping coursework, not getting dressed or showering

3. not wanting to be around people/deal with social interactions of any sort
examples: not leaving the house except for work, calling in sick to work often, not returning emails or phone calls, avoiding friends & family

I have actually never had thoughts of death when I feel depressed because I barely have thoughts of anything nor can I concentrate. That's not to say suicidal thoughts have not been a part of my bipolar, they have. I've experienced them, however, when in a dysphoric/mixed state. I'm not usually tearful when truly depressed, either. It's almost as though crying would take too much energy or effort. Tearfulness is more of a "coming down" from a manic state thing for me-- an anxiety type symptom where my thoughts are still racing around.

.

[avlady]

I also have Bipolar, ptsd, gad, sad, schitzophrenia. i feel exactly how you do according to your symptoms mentioned. i try to stay by myself except for my husband and son. i wish i could get a job, but i know i couldn't handle it. i have recently been thinking of sighning myself in the pshyc ward. i just can't get anything done without it being a huge chore. i clean my home everyday, but that is about all i really do all day. i have few friends who live in other states so i have no social life, neighbors all moved away recently too.

[raspberrytorte]

Crying for no reason is a big one for me. And I always feel suicidal. And getting stuff done around the house is hard (usually I'm very good at cleaning. I've been depressed, or whatever I've been, lately, and the apartment was starting to look like a bachelor pad because it was just my husband cleaning, until yesterday when I made myself do some cleaning). I also get delusional, like think everyone would be better off without me, drain on family, etc. During my last one I even had this delusion in my head that if I was gone my husband could just get together with our babysitter, and it would be better for everyone because then my daughter could have a stay at home mom. And I get really paranoid and have some mild hallucinations.

Normally I'm a pissed off depressed person though. Like, I feel really angry right now. And I get agitated. At least, this time. And can't concentrate.

Though this is the first one like that. Last time I was depressed I wrote an entire novel with no problem (except that the novel was pretty dark).

[Crazy Hitch]

I don't quite know how to answer this.

When I had depressive episodes, before I was initially diagnosed BP2 (I'm BP1 now) - for me, personally, my depressive episodes felt the same before and after the dx of BP2.

Other's opinions may differ though.

[Treyfrancis21]

My depressions are full of emptiness. A giant hole that refuses to be filled. Also super lethargic, and lately full of agitation and anger.

[Secretum]

Common depressive symptoms I get:

-heavy limbs
-low energy
-depressive feeling of my soul rotting inside of my chest.
-feeling like a failure, talentless, a complete waste of a human being
-not getting much joy out of life
-suicidal thoughts
-oversleeping

I've read that people with bipolar are more likely than unipolars to have "atypical" depressions involving increased sleep (rather than insomnia) and an increase, rather than a decrease, in appetite. Atypical depression also involves the ability to temporarily feel better in response to something good happening ("mood brightening") and an increased sensitivity to interpersonal rejection.