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#1
Jul 20, 2015, 08:55 PM
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This will be interesting... Why should I fight mania? After suffering so long in a depression, I should reward myself with the wonderful energy! Yea, I know it can get bad, but I'll just go back on my meds before then. Everything will be perfect. If only I was always slightly hypomanic, that would be the ideal world...
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I appreciate your help.... But even you can't save me from myself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Med cocktail: Geodon 40 mg
Dapakote 1500 mg |
 Crazy Hitch
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#2
Jul 20, 2015, 09:02 PM
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Quote:
Famous last words... Stay safe
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Helping others gets me out of my own head ~ |
 secretgalaxy, Trippin2.0
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#3
Jul 20, 2015, 09:12 PM
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Just keep in mind that for every day your meds take to wear off, it will probably take that many days for them to kick back in when you start taking them again. Meaning you may have to somehow survive believing you are God and that rules don't apply to you for a couple of days before they can bring you back down to stability. Then again, getting your pants pulled down in the ER by a stranger to give you a tranquilizer in the *** is the quick way down. If it's worth the gamble for you, then go for it, I guess. Me, I've never been a high roller.
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A tamed mind is the key to happiness. -Fortune Cookie Med Free Since June 30th, 2016 due to a miscarriage. Sweet child of mine, you have set me free. |
| secretgalaxy, Trippin2.0
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#4
Jul 20, 2015, 09:54 PM
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Are you just stopping completely? Won't you have withdrawal? I don't know about you, but for me withdrawal is a huge downer. It just sucks.
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
| secretgalaxy
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#5
Jul 20, 2015, 11:56 PM
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I can so relate to this. When I feel the mania starting, I taper back my meds to try and make it last, but hopefully still take enough to control the full blown and destructive mania. And I love it. But is it worth the crash afterwards?
I'm really struggling with this right at the moment. And I'm not taking my meds properly because of it. I try not to sleep to mess with it. For me, it's certainly a love hate relationship. Any addiction, and mania can be addictive, is generally not good. One day soon, I hope I will take my own advice...... xXx |
| secretgalaxy
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#6
Jul 21, 2015, 02:20 AM
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Oh dear.
Been there. Got the tshirt. It didn't turn out well ... but hey mine was for a bit more than one night of missing meds. Hope it turns out okay for you. |
| secretgalaxy
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#7
Jul 21, 2015, 05:02 AM
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Woke up at 3 and watch three episodes of House M.D. (a really great show if you haven't heard about it). And now I feel like biking five miles with my dog. I haven't had this much energy in months! I feel great, and can't wait to be able to do the things I use to do.
I know mania is a slippery slope, but it can also be a thrilling adventure! Before I would still be asleep but now I have so much energy! It's great!
__________________
I appreciate your help.... But even you can't save me from myself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Med cocktail: Geodon 40 mg
Dapakote 1500 mg |
| Anonymous200230
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#8
Jul 21, 2015, 03:22 PM
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Weren't you threatening your mother with a knife the last time you were manic? That's what I remember reading here. So maybe it's not a good idea....
FYI, I stopped meds too to become manic and when I finally decided to go back on them they no longer worked. Don't think you can just jump back on your meds and everything will be peachy keen.
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
| secretgalaxy
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#9
Jul 21, 2015, 05:09 PM
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For me psychosis rides along my episodes and mirrors their severity, soooo I usually have a pretty good indicator of just how out of my mind I really am on occasion when I realize I'm delusional or hallucinating.
Remember that energy is one thing; sleep deprivation however is a beast. |
| secretgalaxy
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#10
Jul 21, 2015, 05:30 PM
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I went back on them this morning. I was scolded for "forgetting" my meds yesterday, and my meds were increased greatly, with another one added. Yay. Since the meds give me normal energy, waking up at 3 and doing all I did made me tired so I had to take a 3 hour nap. I have to take 5 pills tonight and if that doesn't knock me out then there's definitely a problem.
This morning was definitely fun though! But I'd rather be out and "normal" than threatened or place in IP. I'm just one level below it at the moment being in PHP. And yes, I did threaten my mom, but that was when I was on Abilify I believe, and it turned my mania into a serious rage. All my meds do now is make me tired. Psychosis is a pretty big part of my mania as I always hear voices and slightly hallucinate, even out of episodes, which make me susceptible to psychosis. All my mania end up with me not sleeping for days as I prepare to go into the government's elite team, or something similar to that. Anyway, I'm back on them, but I don't know if I can stay on them knowing that the sweet energy is just waiting underneath. I will try to remind myself that while manias are fun, it's best not to mess with fire. Thanks for all the concern guys, it definitely helped me make the right choice.
__________________
I appreciate your help.... But even you can't save me from myself. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Med cocktail: Geodon 40 mg
Dapakote 1500 mg |
| Anonymous200230
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