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#1
Aug 11, 2015, 11:01 AM
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I've been stable for a short while. It's nice. I'm back to my life. The increase in the antidepressant, which my doctor insisted would "do the trick" but which I was highly hesistant, seems to have worked. Other than being tired, my life feels orderly and peaceful. However, I am lacking the joy I once had. Where does this come from?
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***** Every finger in the room is pointing at me I want to spit in their faces then I get afraid of what that could bring I got a bowling ball in my stomach I got a desert in my mouth Figures that my courage would choose to sell out now Tori Amos ~ Crucify Dx: Schizoaffective Disorder |
 Anonymous200280, BrandonAK, wildflowerchild25
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#2
Aug 11, 2015, 11:18 AM
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Over medicated maybe?
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The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
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#3
Aug 11, 2015, 11:32 AM
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I feel the same. I just feel like I'm on auto pilot. I feel nothing inside. Maybe a little depressed, if anything. My mood stabiliser's been reduced. Hoping this helps me.
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#4
Aug 11, 2015, 01:13 PM
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Stability seems to come at a price a lot of the time. Being stable seems to cut down on my joy that I would normally have but it's better than the depression I would have too.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
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Bipolar I, Depression, GAD Meds: Zoloft, Zyprexa, Ritalin "Each morning we are born again. What we do today is what matters most." -Buddha  |
| marmaduke
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#5
Aug 11, 2015, 01:25 PM
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I would trade the absolute high excitement for life for less depression every day. Though it is hard for me, I promised myself that I would stick to it.
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#6
Aug 11, 2015, 04:07 PM
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You are not alone. I miss feeling truly happy or true gratitude for things. I'm numb 85ish% of the time but stable. Unfortunately I want to live with stable- I HATE the hospital!
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Kimber  Dx- Bipolar 1, General Anxiety Meds: 800 seroquel, 300 lamictal, 20 prozac, 150 wellbutrin, 600mg x3 Gabapentin, Synthroid, (Crestor, Tricor, and Metformin to counteract it all.) "It's ok to not know all the answers. It's better to admit our ignorance than to believe answers that might be wrong. Pretending to know everything closes the door to finding out what's really out there." --Neil Degrasee-Tyson |
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#7
Aug 11, 2015, 05:36 PM
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Quote:
I've posted about this multiple times.. The joys of being "normal". Not all that interesting is it ? Trust me I feel you Sent from my iPhone 6 plus using Tapatalk
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Then it comes to be that the soothing light at the end of your tunnel... it's just a freight train coming your way. |
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#8
Aug 12, 2015, 08:51 AM
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It is such an odd conundrum to me. This is how people without bipolar feel?
Before diagnosis, I thought everyone felt like me. As such, I treated people as if they were having the same experiences emotionally. I did not know how far off I was! Sent from my Nexus 5 using Tapatalk |
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#9
Aug 12, 2015, 09:04 AM
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numb =/= stable
Even if your pdocs says it over and over. Normal people feel joy and emotions. Without them you are just surviving. Maybe it's why I choose not to medicate my condition, because I am danger to myself in numb state. I get in the state of mind... described in book "Veronica decides to die". Kinda "eh, why not end it, it's never gonna be interesting anyways". Depressed feelings are painful, but pain means you are still alive. And they might be often sign something is wrong. And the good feelings? What is life without them? If you feel the same about war and kittens, death and music, Fukushima explosition and your grandchildren.... it's not stability. It's something that is alarmingly wrong.
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Glory to heroes!
HATEFREE CULTURE |
 BipolaRNurse, Trippin2.0
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#10
Aug 12, 2015, 05:47 PM
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I know this situation well. It stinks.
A little stability seems to kill all the creativity inside me and I love the creativity.
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I traded it in for a whole 'nother world A pirate flag and an island girl |
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