I am the bipolar spouse...help

i suffer from severe bipolar paranoia and depression and I am pushing my husband of ten years away with the constant accusations of cheating I don't know how to stop the negative thoughts from coming out of my mouth, I am on meds....what to do????he is threatening to leave

Have you tried cognitive behavioral therapy? It's all about challenging distorted thinking and negative thoughts and reframing them. It might help your paranoia about the cheating.

Maybe the meds are not working well enough. I used to suppose that my wife is concealing our money for herself and conspiring against me someway all the time. I was angry to her all the time and she couldn't figure out why because i never told her. Just kept observing her suspiciously. Nowadays i recognize it's the first sign of me sliding towards mixed state. I realized how ridiculous it was when i was on Seroquel. After quitting Seroquel i was off meds for a while and these thoughts came back, but this time i realized that it's only my imagination so i cope with it quite well. I don't know if therapy would help, i have no experience. My thoughts were so strong i doubt if it would have worked for me.

btw welcome to the forum

It's not easy dealing with paranoia and yes it can certainly affect our relationships and challenge our thoughts. I'm not sure I have the solution because I have experienced extreme paranoia with my husband in the past. The only way I get by is to remind myself if there is no proof it simply doesn't exist. And to keep focusing on the positives of what he does do. There is heaps that he does do that would dispel the idea of what my paranoia conceives him to be doing.

my vote is that you're not on the right mood stabilizer for you. those thoughts you're having about your spouse cheating on you are pretty classic for not being stable. I suggest you see your pdoc more often -- and couples counseling is the way to go as well.

Therapy is needed. Meds can only do so much. Bipolar needs attacked/addressed from all sides.

I wish you luck

Agree therapy is needed, and needed before you destroy your marriage. I say this because (Google Search) Bipolar marriages have a 90% divorce rate. So called normal people rate is 50%. I would think you are killing some of your husbands emotions slowly. I would not beat yourself up if a divorce resulted, but I think you need to be aware if you place a high importance on the marriage, you should seek help.

Really, just wanted to welcome you to PC.

I would go with a possible med adjustment and for sure some Therapy. Do not try to fix this by yourself.

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