Where has bipolar 'left' you

My car is sitting in the lot cuz I can't afford plates. But I can afford stupid crap and junk food to feed my eating disorder. My family thinks that because I don't work, I'm in drugs. My house is something out of "hoarders" right now. I'm probably at my worst now but I'm feeling a slight lift from my new meds. Hope it lasts.

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It has left me at the end of my rope at only 41 years-old... I HAVE HAD ENOUGH!!!!!!!!!!

**CK THIS LIFE

I used to be a successful nurse and director of nursing services. Now I'm unable to work at all thanks to a combination of bipolar, anxiety and physical co-morbidities. This is not the life I envisioned for myself. But I make the best of it and am reasonably content. There are worse things.

Insecure.

Congratulations on finding contentment. I admit I am still in the grieving of losing my past self. I still look back on my 'fall' with resentment. I wonder if part of this has been the coinciding loss of a social network. Had my family not brought me home to be close to them, not torn me away from my supportive circle of friends, would I be having an easier time of coping? Would having at least part of my former life make it easier to accept the loss of the rest?

I have a better one.

It has left me as not the person I used to be.

Guilty, frustrated, and belittled.

Tired, hopeless, and a "shell" of the motivated, intelligent, successful person I once was.

I have done things I'm not proud of when hypomanic

Yes, this!

lately bipolar has left me feeling deflated

has left me psychotic

It has left me without my job, boyfriend of 12 years, and home. My family is close to calling it quits.
It has given me 40 pounds of extra weight, 6 hospitalizations, a record of run-ins with the cops, a bunch of new meds, and a PTSD relapse.
Broke, homeless, single, fat and crazy. C'est la vie

At the moment, alone, uncertain, insecure, hopeless, stuck inside my head.
Emotionally, there's nothing left to win, and nothing left to lose.

3 months ago I would have said that it left me weak and helpless. But I'm not anymore. I'm not sure how (maybe a good combination of meds, therapy, and support from my fiance), but I feel like I'm happy with my life for the first time ever. 3 months ago I had quit another job, had no money, didn't have any faith in myself, and was spiraling downward into depression. But since then, I've gotten back on meds that work, found a job I enjoy, and started therapy, all of which have worked wonders. I never thought I'd make it to where I am now.

Now, I'd answer that question like this: it's left me with the ability to deal with problems that no one I know has ever had to deal with. It's left me capable of seeing the worst, but also the best in every situation. It's left me the weakest person in the world, but also the strongest. And most importantly, it's left me able to understand myself and others in a way that lets me have empathy like I never thought I could.

running out of bridges to burn

It has left me running the race so slowwwwly, I'm sometimes not quite sure if I'm even moving forward in life.


Its has left me with fewer options waiting for me at the finishing line.


It has left me frustrated and angry, because instead of a great career and a life all figured out, all my lovely IQ is worth now is making steam come out of my ears like I'm some stupid cartoon character.


So bipolar has left me a cartoon character who runs in slow motion while steam comes out of her ears, except I don't think any of this is *****ing funny.


I never aspired to be a looney toons character.

It has left me feeling like a loser; no friends, barely any family, no job, no life. It has left me being terrified of my illness.

Bipolar left me friendless, homeless, jobless, and penniless. For a while I thought everything was over. But I've slowly been educating myself about bipolar, I've been getting treatment which is really starting to help, and I'm determined to restore and maintain stability in my life. Bipolar is a devious and nefarious enemy, and it has to be combated vigorously. To everyone who's posted here with stories similar to mine, don't give up the fight. And remember to be gentle with yourself.

Actually i am in pretty good shape as long as I have my meds and a good nights sleep.

sexless
stupid
rotten memory
sad
depressed
confused
insomniac
chronic fatigue
nauseated
no judgement
isolated
alone
asocial
don't care about life
apathetic
no longer able to write coherently
unable to determine what is caused by meds or bipolar
etc.
etc.

But other than the above life is just ****ing grand.

Demoralized, acutely constipated, divorced, severely depressed, lost my business,
very little income, chronically fatigued, alone, isolated, don't fit in anywhere, I used to be the life of the party. poor memory, too many credit cards, no income, feeling totally lost, I really fear things will get worse. Sexual dysfunction, find it hard to find anything to care about. ANY INFORMATION ON CONSTIPATION WILL BE GREATLY APPRECIATED

Exhausted. So much so that I have a lot on my mind, but barely the energy to say it. A weakened support system. Turns out that people only want to be around during the good times. Finances are in a shambles. I desperately wish I could just snap my fingers and make it go away.

Amitiza! It's for chronic constipation and it really, really helps me. It increases lubrication in the intestines so it's not a laxative, just increases the chances of success.

It's a prescription med. I get it free from patient assistance (I ask for an exemption because I have medicare but can't afford it with medicare) and they've never had a problem with that.

It pretty much changed my life; I had such bad constipation from meds and while I still have it at times it's nothing close to how it used to get and most of the time it's not a problem.

quite the pattern I see here