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Old Oct 16, 2015, 04:10 PM
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ComfortablyNumb5 ComfortablyNumb5 is offline
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I don't have children yet and I'm 2 years short of 30 and my boyfriend and I have talked about it. I think my major concern is that I'll pass my problems on to my children and that they'll be troubled with BP or alcoholics too (recovering alcoholic here). I've read a lot about the chances of passing mental disorders on to your children.

(From an article I read) "Yes, bipolar disorder runs in families; it is the most genetic major psychiatric condition. It is more genetic than schizophrenia and major depression. If you have a parent or sibling with bipolar disorder, then there is a 10-15% likelihood that you will develop it."

I suppose the chances are not high, but what if?

A few yrs ago I had a miscarriage but when I told my pdoc that I have to get off my meds because I was preg, he said "people like you shouldn't have children". Needless to say that was the last time I saw that a*shole.

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  #2  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 04:41 PM
newtothis31 newtothis31 is offline
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I'm a Mom with BiPolar Type I. My Dad is an alcoholic, my Mom has paranoid schizophrenia.
My daughter is five, and she is amazing.
Being a parent is a huge challenge but incredibly rewarding.
My p-doc thinks that the likelihood for passing on BP is about 20%.
However- the good news is that even if my daughter gets any of the illnesses mentioned above, I will still be there to love, support, and advocate for her.
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  #3  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 04:47 PM
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I too am a mom (and grandmother) with bipolar 1, and three of my four grown children are free of any mental illness. The older boy has bipolar 2, but it's controlled on only two medications. So having bipolar doesn't mean your kids will get it.
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  #4  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 05:29 PM
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I have a child with BP. He had a higher chance because his father also has bp. His BP is complicated by PDD Nos. He's on meds and in therapy but still has difficulty making and keeping friends and understanding others intentions. He picks
at his skin so he constantly looks like he has the chicken pox. He can be a jerk but is a really sweet kid. We worry for his future but know we've been trying our best. Yes he'll deal with ****** emotions but life he has when well life is good. Having family that understands is worth a lot. Some feel it's selfish to have kids but that can be any parent not just parents with mi. It does take more planning when you have mi then "normal ".
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  #5  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 05:53 PM
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I have BP1 and no one else in my family has been diagnosed with bipolar. Only some anxiety here and there.
  #6  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 05:54 PM
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My sons father and i both have bp. My son is not. He suffers depression but so far no bp. He is 19. If something is going to manifest it will within the next few years. He has support and love and most of all understanding.
  #7  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 06:03 PM
passionfruit3 passionfruit3 is offline
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My cousin has it she gets it from her dad's side so it doesn't affect me but i have it still i believe it's a miss diagnosis but i worry about my cousins child who has only her grandparents and doesn't know her father mother's bipolar and did or still does drugs don't know .shes only 5 my cousins daughter but not sure if she has bipolar shes got into some trouble at school but the grandparents don't seem concerned shes really young but it runs in there family and the way this little girls life has already played out so far it's concerning

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  #8  
Old Oct 16, 2015, 06:56 PM
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I would think more about whether or not you want to be a parent. Being a parent with bipolar disorder has it's own challenges. However, being a parent can be very rewarding too.

Your children may or may not develop it. If you didn't have bipolar, your children still could develop it. Life is too short to worry about the what ifs.

I'm the only person in my family diagnosed with bipolar disorder.
Thanks for this!
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  #9  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 01:04 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RxQueen875 View Post
I don't have children yet and I'm 2 years short of 30 and my boyfriend and I have talked about it. I think my major concern is that I'll pass my problems on to my children and that they'll be troubled with BP or alcoholics too (recovering alcoholic here). I've read a lot about the chances of passing mental disorders on to your children.

(From an article I read) "Yes, bipolar disorder runs in families; it is the most genetic major psychiatric condition. It is more genetic than schizophrenia and major depression. If you have a parent or sibling with bipolar disorder, then there is a 10-15% likelihood that you will develop it."

I suppose the chances are not high, but what if?

A few yrs ago I had a miscarriage but when I told my pdoc that I have to get off my meds because I was preg, he said "people like you shouldn't have children". Needless to say that was the last time I saw that a*shole.

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I'm bipolar with 5 kids. Three are dx with ad/hd ( one of the 3 also has aspergers but highly intelligent and his issues are mainly behavioral and sensory related) and the other two are not dx with anything. None of them have been dx with bipolar. Me and my father are the only two I know of in my family who had it. I think sometimes statistics can be beat because my family had its fair share of alcoholics too but I'm not (I don't think anyway) I do drink occasionally but I'm nothing like my father was. I can live without it, but my dad would go into DTs and I hardly remember seeing him sober a day in my life before he died.
As far as my kids, only one of them has had as many struggles as I have with my MI but he is also the happiest one in the family.
So I guess these are my statistics for you to consider if you want.
  #10  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 02:31 AM
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I have two grown children, 25 and 28. Both bipolar.
  #11  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 05:11 AM
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I'm the only BP'er out of 2 parents and 6 kids.


I also worried about passing it on to my now 11 y.o daughter, especially when she asked me if she could get it.


But she told me, "don't worry,at least if I get it you'll be there to help me. I wont have to struggle alone like you have been doing"


So now I don't worry about it, we'll cross that bridge when and if we get there.


I agree that the more important question is whether you actually want kids and can manage having them, than what ifs.


What if your child is born with 6 fingers, what if your child is born with a learning disability, what if your child is born with down syndrome, there's an almost infinite amount of what ifs we can come up with... Living our lives based on what ifs limits us even further than this disorder does.


And really this disorder already robs so many of us, I would find it sad if any of us willingly gave it any more than it already snatches away.
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  #12  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 01:52 PM
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I'm the only one in my family (and extended family as far as I know) who has it, if that means anything.
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  #13  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 01:57 PM
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im also the only one in my family with mental illness. this is part of the reason I dont really want kids

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  #14  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 04:52 PM
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I come from a long line of bipolar people, depressed people, people with anxiety, and also addiction. I got all of it with the added touch of OCD. Fun times. I'm not going to have kids. Both of my parents had mental illness and were addicts. About the only person without a mental illness was my grandfather on my mother's side. My grandma on the other hand is totally loony.
  #15  
Old Oct 17, 2015, 05:07 PM
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Neither of my parents have it, but my 2 aunts on my mom's side and a couple cousins on my dad's side do. I guess it skips around in my family. My fiance and I haven't decided if we'll have kids or not yet. I have more health issues than just BP, so there are a few risks if we do have kids... I'm more worried about passing on other problems than BP though. I don't view BP as a big enough problem to want to avoid having kids, but that could be because it's manageable for me.
  #16  
Old Oct 19, 2015, 12:20 AM
Anonymous200280
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I would not put a child through the hell ive been through, nor burdon my partner with a mini me. I wish i was never born, and i dont wish that on anyone.
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