[pearlys]

Hi,
My latest dx is dipolar disorder. I already suspected it myself since my latest episode and when I look back on my life this happened about 2 times before. I guess it just happens when I take paxil. But the rollercoaster gets wilder and wilder as I grew older. The depressions deeper and longer and my latest manic episode was nastier than ever. They are not sure yet if im type I or II. I was not psychotic during my mania but I had all the other ****, inflated self esteem, spending spree, extreme irritability, restless, sleeping just 3 hours a night or less, talking fast and switching from one topic tothe other, grandiose phantasies, unprotected sex with strangers, fighting people in traffic, agressive, lots of energy (going to the gym 7x a week plus a combat sport). But underneath I was still depressed I guess. I was also crying a lot and desperate cuz my head was like a high speed train. After a while I became completely exhausted, I thought it was from sporting too much so I started to skip some days, but I became more and more exhausted. Until from one day to the other DANG, depressed as I was never before. 23 hours a day in bed, not eating, hardly drinking, not taking care of myself at all.
Now they don't prescribe me paxil anymore. Instead I have wellbutrin. But in my opinion it doesnt do enough for my depression. Im on it since 3 months, increased dosage to 300mg. But still I sleep 10 hours a night. At least I sleep well. My mood still swings, I can have a day that I have more energy and uplifted mood, next day I feel exhausted and suicidal again. I was always against meds but now anything that can help me is fine. I wanna live again. Some kind of mood stabilizer maybe. I was on lithium before but stopped because of the side effects. My cousin was on depakine, maybe that would be an alternative. Or seroquel which they gave me just before my manic switch. (I was so stubborn that I didnt want seroquel but paxil instead... stupid me...).
Anyway, this last episode made my life a mess. On disability, marriage is broken, feelings of guilt, exhausted; I guess I am still recovering from the artificial energy? Or is it the depression?

So far my story. I might have posted this already somewhere here on the forum but I never had BP dx until now.

[Crazy Hitch]

Welcome to the club

[HALLIEBETH87]

Welcome!

[pearlys]

Thx all for this warm welcome

Question: is hypersexuality part of the mania? During my latest episode I was thinking about sex all the time and seducing women. Also the sex that I had was completely different than what Im used to, plus the frequency. No problems at all with libido.
Now, depressed, my libido is so-so and sex itself seems even boring compared to that episode. Not that I want to go back to that time but some aspects were good. Or is this way of thinking strange?

That episode felt like I was on drugs and on a high constantly. Well actually I was on drugs: paxil. Now I also feel like Im on drugs but a heavy downer. Everything goes slow, my thinking, my speech, my movement, my memory, my actions.

Welcome to the club. Yes, hyper sexuality is a symptom of mania.

[pearlys]

Does mania occur naturally or are triggers necessary? Like stress, insomnia, some medications?

[pearlys]

Extreme restlessness and irritability (even when not hypo/manic) , is that a sign of bipolar? I read something about it.

[fishin fool]

Those are things I experience and I am bipolar 2.
Irritability is a big one.

[Sesiley]

Originally Posted by pearlys

Extreme restlessness and irritability (even when not hypo/manic) , is that a sign of bipolar? I read something about it.

Reminds me of a mixed episode

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[Sesiley]

Originally Posted by pearlys

Does mania occur naturally or are triggers necessary? Like stress, insomnia, some medications?

Medications, insomnia, and stress have the ability to cause a manic episode.

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[pearlys]

I always thought mania is much worse like think you can fly or think you are Jesus or Napoleon but apparently what I experienced is enough to qualify.

Welcome to the club, Pearlys! I like your avatar! What a dear, sweet monkey face! I have very active manias too, tho not as active as yours. I get a beautiful, sweeping euphoria mainly, but it ends in paranoia. I'm more interested in sex but i don't really pursue it. My manias are triggered by the season -- i get mania in the Spring. Hope you sort yourself out! I am sleeping 10 hours a day now that it's Summer too. Welcome!

[~Christina]

My mania usually presents in irritability and anger,, I seldom get the Happy rainbow puppy exciting amazing stuff.

[WithGrace]

Welcome pearlys

[pearlys]

I really really thought mania is worse than what i went through... Now I understand that my pdoc said that it might even have been full mania. Why didnt I get help during that episode, while I was busy ruining my entire life.

[Victoria'smom]

Welcome, sorry your episode did that to you.

[gina_re]

Sorry to hear about what happened. Welcome to the bipolar life, you have a supportive community behind you now.

[pearlys]

Can you share your own symptoms please? Because sometimes I still can't believe my diagnosis. Sometimes I think I just was going through a hard time (my latest episode was mixed I think or partly mixed).

[pearlys]

Curious as I am I start reading a lot about this disease. I was looking for triggers and found this:
(Source)
Avoiding Top Bipolar Triggers

Bipolar disorder is characterized by extreme shifts in mood — from high moments of grandeur to deeply depressed lows.
And when those shifts are severe enough, they can have a profound effect on your life."It may take months or years to piece your life back together after the damage is done", says psychiatrist Jeffrey Bennett, MD, an assistant professor of psychiatry at the Southern Illinois University School of Medicine in Springfield.
But can they be avoided? Perhaps. Understanding what triggers mood swings and planning ahead to deal with them can help you avoid a damaging episode of mania or depression.
One of the most common bipolar triggers is stress. In a study published in June 2014 in the Journal of Affective Disorders, negative or stressful life events seemed to trigger mood swings. “People with bipolar disorder are seven to eight times more likely to experience an unwanted, extended period of extreme mood shift — failure of their ususal coping mechanisms — in response to a stressful life event,” says Dr. Bennett. The events that cause serious stress are highly individual, but certain key life events and lifestyle patterns may act as triggers.
Watch out for these common bipolar triggers.

Skimping on Sleep
A change in your sleep pattern is a hallmark symptom of bipolar disorder — but it can also be a trigger.
Shift workers, people who work long hours, and students who are short on sleep are all at risk for bipolar mood swings related to a lack of sleep. Social rhythms therapy is the most effective prevention, Bennett says. This treatment approach, available in group as well as individual sessions, helps you develop an orderly life schedule surrounding sleep, diet, and exercise habits to make you more effective at managing bipolar disorder.

Blow-Out Arguments

Broken relationahips are too often the result of untreated bipolar disorder.
But getting into a spat with a loved one could also be a red flag: Your argument could be due to the irritability that signals an upcoming bipolar mood swing, or it could trigger a bipolar episode. Any type of relationship conflict — whether it’s with your partner, co-worker, family member, or friend — can trigger stress and send you over the edge. In a study published in May 2015 in the Journal of Affective Disorders, people with bipolar disorder said negative social experiences were among the events that triggered suicidal thinking for them.

A Bad Breakup

A number of people with bipolar disorder — especially those with a history of manic episodes — have failed marriages.
If you’re going through a divorce, working with your therapist through what is often a drawn-out — and extremely stressful — process can help. Bennett also says you might consider a durable power of attorney that allows someone else to make major decisions for you, such as financial ones, when you are going through bipolar mood swings because of a breakup.

Boozing and Using Drugs

Abusing drugs and alcohol doesn’t cause bipolar disorder, but it can set off a serious bipolar episode. What’s more, about one in five people with bipolar disorder have a substance abuse problem, according to an analysis of data on young adults with mental illness published in February 2015 in the journal Social Psychiatry and Psychiatric Epidemiology.
Drugs such as cocaine and amphetamines may trigger mania, while alcohol is strongly linked to depressive episodes.

Antidepressants and Other Medications

Can antidepressants make you manic? While recent studies have not done much to prove that antidepressants lead to mania in people with bipolar disorder, many psychiatrists say they’ve seen patients enter a manic phase after starting antidepressants — and some feel uncomfortable prescribing them to their bipolar patients.
What should you do about bipolar depression? Until more research is available on long-term safety, Keming Gao, MD, PhD, a professor of psychiatry at Case Western Reserve School of Medicine, suggests the following: Antidepressants should only be used as a last resort for more serious symptoms of bipolar depression that have not responded to mood stabilizers; they should never be used for bipolar treatment alone; and patients and doctors should consider removing antidepressants once symptoms have responded.
Other medications that have been linked to manic episodes include corticosteroids, thyroid medications, and appetite suppressants.

A Brand-New Season

About 20 percent of people with bipolar disorder experience fluctuations in mood when the weather changes. Specifically, they're more likely to undergo seasonal depression during the early winter, and mania or hypomania during the spring or summer, according to a research review published in October 2014 in the Journal of Affective Disorders.
Experts chalk this up to sunlight: Your circadian rhythm, the body’s internal response to changes in a 24-hour day, responds to the amount of sunlight. This response is controlled by a complex set of genes commonly referred to as “clock genes.” If some of these genes are abnormal, you could be at risk for seasonal bipolar disorder.

A Visit From the Stork

The American College of Obstetrics and Gynecology estimates that women with bipolar disorder have up to a 67 percent chance of bipolar mood swings in the postpartum period — the weeks and months after birth.
Changing sleep patterns, altered medication prescriptions, and shifting hormones after delivery can combine as bipolar triggers, according to research published in November 2014 in the journal The Lancet. Use the nine months of pregnancy to work with your entire medical team — your bipolar disorder specialists and your ob-gyn — on treatment approaches you can try during and after pregnancy to help prevent postpartum depression.

Job Loss

One of life’s most unpredictable stressors? Losing your job.
And the emotions you may feel about your job loss can be equally unpredictable. People who weren’t satisfied with their work can find it liberating. For others, the financial and emotional strains involved can trigger major stress. Either way, the dramatic shift in emotions could trigger a bipolar episode.
It may be a good idea to put away three to six months of savings to help with the transition, should you lose your job.

Grief

The death of a loved one may the most stressful life event any of us will ever face. Many people continue managing bipolar disorder successfully through their mourning, but others develop “funeral mania,” says Dr. Bennett. This occurs when someone with controlled bipolar disorder attends the funeral of the loved one and almost instantly has a manic episode.
Prevention of a bipolar mood swing is possible if you and your therapist prepare in advance.

[pearlys]

What played a role in my life I ask myself?

Stress for sure: severe relational stress, a demanding partner, even when I lost some beloved ones. Stress about work. Insomnia during years which got worse and worse over time. And finally paxil. That was the last trigger I needed to go over the edge.

[gina_re]

There was a thread a while ago where members shared there story, maybe this will help...

What's your story? - Forums at Psych Central

Welcome *hugs*

[pearlys]

Talked to PDoc today, diagnosis is BP II. She prescribed me lamictal. Starting with 25mg. Hope it is a strong anti depressant because I really need that. Eventually we could up the mirtazapine (im on 3,75-7,5mg) since that is not contra indicated in people with BP.
Really hope the lamictal works better than wellbutrin.

[pearlys]

Im on 75 mg lamotrigine, tomorrow 100mg. I dont know i its the meds but i sleep 10 hours a night and still tired when i get out of bed
What a waste of time

[BastetsMuse]

Originally Posted by pearlys

Hi,
My latest dx is dipolar disorder.
So far my story. I might have posted this already somewhere here on the forum but I never had BP dx until now.

Welcome to the club. It's a lifetime admission. Take your meds and realize that you're still the same person you always have been, and learn to cope. It's not easy, but the trip is worth it. Honest.