[BeyondtheRainbow]

That would be heading BACK DOWN....My cat stepped on the keyboard and I didn't realized she changed title.

The time change is working its usual magic. I want to sleep ALL THE TIME. And with that my mood is shifting. I am much more depressed than hypomanic and that wasn't true even 3-4 days ago. And the anxiety is building so that I think I'm more anxious than hypomanic. Which means that I'm probably looking at hitting bottom in a few more days, knowing my general pattern. Hopefully not bottom, I can't imagine going that low again so soon, but definitely low. Falling asleep is still hard but that's been true for months no matter what the mood is. But now I want to sleep all day too. I've had 2-3 hours of naps the last few days and I'm not doing anything. I've done a little housework, walked the dogs to get a little exercise, and tonight I REALLY pushed and sewed a pair of pajama pants that I took apart to tighten the elastic back up. That's been waiting for me to do it for weeks.

Mostly I want to play solitaire. For hours. Which is not typical. I inherited my grandmother's diaries and my sister wanted photos of pages from them for some mysterious Christmas project. I was taking those tonight and started reading a little and just cried.

I am so overwhelmed at the idea of Christmas shopping. I just want to give everyone gift cards. Which may happen for the adults but my nieces deserve presents. I think I have one of them figured out. 1 more to go and a good bit of sewing ahead.

I tried to communicate with someone about some information I thought he might be interested in. Somehow that got turned around so completely that I'm still confused. My communication skills can be bad when I'm out there but this apparently was a huge set of errors.

Stupid seasonal affective disorder combined with stupid bipolar that doesn't know when to quit.....Oh well. It is what it is I guess.

[HALLIEBETH87]

My last pdoc mentioned SAD to me and I wonder if I do have it

[Victoria'smom]

My last pdoc thought I had SAD. He said most bipolars do.

[Pastel Kitten]

I have no clue if I have SAD because I'm a rapid cycler. Up, down, and all around no matter what time of year

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I'm a rapid cycler too but SAD feels different. I don't know how to explain it but it is different.

I have a light but I can only use it when I'm relatively stable or it shoots me into mania, even though I have one that lets me use really low settings. This year is definitely NOT a year I'll be using it, at least not for now.

I find that I get seasonal changes routinely. I get depressed in November and manic in June, every year. So maybe not typical SAD but definitely it is there.

I knew it was just a matter of time before the depression overtook my mixed episode and that's happening now. But I don't know how that will happen since my cycling for the past 11 months has been different than usual. I am not usually this anxious with SAD but that may change on its' own.

I kind of think if you question whether you have SAD you probably have it.

[raspberrytorte]

The holidays make me feel overwhelmed too. Work is always really stressful. We just buy giftcards for everyone each year. I think that's okay though. I'm always delighted with gift cards, especially if it's one for amazon.

I have reverse SAD, so last winter I had the reverse problem. I usually take out my light therapy lamp in february because I get tired. Probably not doing that this winter!

I hope you start feeling better! I know I say that all of the time, but I really want you to feel better. Hugs.

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I'm always glad to here that someone hopes I start feeling better. I so appreciate the support. I don't know how I would have gotten through this year without this board. Thank you!