[Victoria'smom]

My sister comes to town tomorrow and so does my parents. My sister and her for kids and staying with me for a week. How do I put on a smile for that long? When I just want to cry all day.

[Standup2me]

I break it into two hour pieces.
I hold it together for two hours, then I go into the bathroom and have little cry, splash water on my face and start over

[BeyondtheRainbow]

I know EXACTLY what you are talking about. I'm dreading the holidays because I'll be spending time with my brother and I need space from him for a while (and he's coming for three days....so now I'm trying to fill that space with whatever I can find. Hopefully an extra therapy session and that takes half a day and somehow some of my sewing is going to get delayed to the last minute. Don't know how that happened..... oops.) I hate letting people see I'm not fine.

My therapist would say not to worry what they think and if you feel bad then feel bad and they can handle it. Be polite but do what you have to do. But that's really hard and right now we're having hard discussions because he thinks I refuse to listen and I think he's asking for something impossible. But that's one professional's opinion. (I've missed some holidays before because he or my pdoc said I was too sick. He's even offered to give me excuse notes saying I just couldn't do whatever. But my family never really understands although they are understanding more after seeing this last year up close).

So I guess I would say the ideal is to be however you feel without the smile and the more reachable is to find things that get you out of there for a while at a time if you can. Tell them you aren't sleeping well and take some naps (even if you are sleeping and just go and lay down and read or something). Take a walk, whatever.

I'm sorry you have to do this. I know how hard it is.

[gayleggg]

I have to pretend as well except I don't have have to keep it up for more than a few hours at a time. Do like Standup2me said and take mini breaks. Good luck.

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[PumpkinPieHead]

I just got through a 3 day stint with my family. My irritability was on high, and not-so-coincidentally, the day they all leave I feel better. I recently adjusted meds so I think both are to blame.

I totally relate, and my advice is to set a limit and stick to it. When it's time to nap or just hole up alone, do it. Your psyche will thank you. And do check in often, we wanna hear from you, OK?

[~Christina]

People pretend in all kinds of ways MI or not. Sometimes you just have to suck it up and do what needs to be done, I'm not blowing off how your feeling, its just sometimes " fake it til you make it" needs to be done for others and sometimes it will help your own mental state.

I dunno maybe with your current train of thought... Divorcing your husband and him having Miquel . Then why not enjoy what could be the last holiday season together?

[Victoria'smom]

I am trying to enjoy it but sporadic crying doesn't help. As far as my husband and I we're trying to work things out as it's unanimously decided ( except for me) that it's the depression not my true feelings.