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Old Mar 10, 2016, 07:08 PM
wiretwister's Avatar
wiretwister wiretwister is offline
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Location: Ky , USA
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well I decided before I started .. this new T would get everything .. no games, nothing helt back ... as they say the truth and only the truth ...no games no trying to manipulate her ... I asked her two things ... (realizing only a dr can dx) I asked her to help me determine once and for all if I am bp ... and number two ... to keep me alive ...
I told her all I could remember ... answered her questions honestly ... gave her my writings, and some I did recently at 2am ( three pages single spaced...really one long sentance that repeated several ideas ... ), gave her postings I have done here ... showed her my journel ....

her comment ... you have ALL the symptoms ... in her opinion yes I most likely am bp ...and my writings are definitely manic ... she still wants to see my wife , and maybe both of us together ... but she was honest with me .. and said she will probably have to hand me off to another ... that I am needing more than she can provide ...

I am really not sure if that is good or bad .... but I do not intend to give up ... I will go foward any way I need to ... no more changing my meds myself ,, no more lies to my pdoc ... I have already gave up acess to all my guns , knives and pills (except enough for a few days) ... my wife seems to think it's a joke ... hoping this T can show her just how serious this could get ... until I found "soon-kyu" I was just days away from "going home" as they say ... even now when I am feeling so much better I am always looking for options , for a painless guarenteed way ... I don't dwell on it like last last year but I also never completely forget about it either ...

Thanks to all my friends here ... and all the love you have shown me ... and bearing with my "obsessive" ways ...

I will get there ... Tigger .
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  #2  
Old Mar 10, 2016, 08:36 PM
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Skeezyks Skeezyks is offline
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Hello wiretwister: I celebrate your decision to tell all... hold nothing back as well as to go forward any way you need to. I send warm thoughts your way with the hope that your efforts will be handsomely rewarded.
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  #3  
Old Mar 10, 2016, 08:48 PM
hopeless2015 hopeless2015 is offline
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  #4  
Old Mar 10, 2016, 09:01 PM
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raspberrytorte raspberrytorte is offline
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Hugs, wire. I'm happy you were honest.

I struggle with whether or not the bp diagnosis is right for me too. I have ever since I was given it. It's been eleven years now! I don't know what's really wrong with me. I guess I just have emotional problems. Lol
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  #5  
Old Mar 10, 2016, 10:36 PM
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Keegan2015 Keegan2015 is offline
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I think it's good that you were transparent with your therapist and don't think that him/her referring you to someone more experienced / who specializes in BP treatment is necessarily a "bad" thing. I hope that your wife begins taking things more seriously ... maybe her coming to a session with your T could help that come along.

Keep fighting the good fight
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  #6  
Old Mar 10, 2016, 10:41 PM
Anonymous37883
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It is my personal opinion that people with bipolar should not have easy access to guns or knives in their homes. I think giving them to your wife is a sound decision.

And not manipulating your therapist is another sound decision.

  #7  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 03:19 AM
ComfortablyNumb5's Avatar
ComfortablyNumb5 ComfortablyNumb5 is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,504
Quote:
Originally Posted by wiretwister View Post
well I decided before I started .. this new T would get everything .. no games, nothing helt back ... as they say the truth and only the truth ...no games no trying to manipulate her ... I asked her two things ... (realizing only a dr can dx) I asked her to help me determine once and for all if I am bp ... and number two ... to keep me alive ...
I told her all I could remember ... answered her questions honestly ... gave her my writings, and some I did recently at 2am ( three pages single spaced...really one long sentance that repeated several ideas ... ), gave her postings I have done here ... showed her my journel ....

her comment ... you have ALL the symptoms ... in her opinion yes I most likely am bp ...and my writings are definitely manic ... she still wants to see my wife , and maybe both of us together ... but she was honest with me .. and said she will probably have to hand me off to another ... that I am needing more than she can provide ...

I am really not sure if that is good or bad .... but I do not intend to give up ... I will go foward any way I need to ... no more changing my meds myself ,, no more lies to my pdoc ... I have already gave up acess to all my guns , knives and pills (except enough for a few days) ... my wife seems to think it's a joke ... hoping this T can show her just how serious this could get ... until I found "soon-kyu" I was just days away from "going home" as they say ... even now when I am feeling so much better I am always looking for options , for a painless guarenteed way ... I don't dwell on it like last last year but I also never completely forget about it either ...

Thanks to all my friends here ... and all the love you have shown me ... and bearing with my "obsessive" ways ...

I will get there ... Tigger .

Good for you!!! You're letting yourself be vulnerable and accepting any and all care from this point on. No BS. No holding back. Open yourself up and start the healing process. Your BP but it's not the end of the world. I have to say I admire this post you made. I'm still procrastinating on getting back into therapy but when I do, the only way to go into it is how you are here. Bravo my friend and keep up the good work. That's the only way you're going to get anything out of this. If it's one thing I have learned, therapy can go good or bad. It's up to you. ((Hugs)).

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  #8  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 05:33 AM
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Ocean Swimmer Ocean Swimmer is offline
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Hey Tigger~
So what did you learn from the new T? You certainly have her enough info regarding yourself!
I've never struggled too much with the bp DX. When it was called
Manic depression I thought , ok that is how I am affected.
Good for you! Getting right person to help you will be great!
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  #9  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 06:40 AM
wiretwister's Avatar
wiretwister wiretwister is offline
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Location: Ky , USA
Posts: 3,015
I am writing this here , but I may make a post later about it ... it seems I am saying the wrong thing in my pm's ... not trying to but it seems I am ... so I have decided to unfriend everyone on my page ... I mean no offence to anyone .. I have always wanted to be helpful .. and it appears I am not doing a very good job of it ... so I am just going to stop sending and reading all pm's ... please do not pm ... I am sorry but you will not receive any futher pm's from me ... bye .. Tigger.
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  #10  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 11:47 AM
BastetsMuse BastetsMuse is offline
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Member Since: Jan 2015
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Keep on keeping on, Tigger... I wish you the best and congratulate you for being honest with your T. Many hugs.
  #11  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 05:43 PM
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BeyondtheRainbow BeyondtheRainbow is offline
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Location: US
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I don't know what to say here; it would be much easier to be private but instead I'll talk around it. I had to be honest with you. If I weren't that would not be a healthy relationship. I don't think you need to shut down totally and honestly since it is me you have a problem with block me and let yourself have other friends. I didn't see this reaction coming and I'm sorry it did but not giving it a chance to talk it out or whatever doesn't really help anyone. I am not sorry for what I said because it was true and it was necessary to say something because of things too personal to me to post on here but I am sorry it upset you. I tried very hard to avoid that. I don't know what else to say; I'm a PM away if you want to talk it out.
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  #12  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 07:08 PM
Hashi/bipolar mom's Avatar
Hashi/bipolar mom Hashi/bipolar mom is offline
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Member Since: May 2015
Location: Somewhere over the rainbow...
Posts: 672
Quote:
Originally Posted by wiretwister View Post
well I decided before I started .. this new T would get everything .. no games, nothing helt back ... as they say the truth and only the truth ...no games no trying to manipulate her ... I asked her two things ... (realizing only a dr can dx) I asked her to help me determine once and for all if I am bp ... and number two ... to keep me alive ...
I told her all I could remember ... answered her questions honestly ... gave her my writings, and some I did recently at 2am ( three pages single spaced...really one long sentance that repeated several ideas ... ), gave her postings I have done here ... showed her my journel ....

her comment ... you have ALL the symptoms ... in her opinion yes I most likely am bp ...and my writings are definitely manic ... she still wants to see my wife , and maybe both of us together ... but she was honest with me .. and said she will probably have to hand me off to another ... that I am needing more than she can provide ...

I am really not sure if that is good or bad .... but I do not intend to give up ... I will go foward any way I need to ... no more changing my meds myself ,, no more lies to my pdoc ... I have already gave up acess to all my guns , knives and pills (except enough for a few days) ... my wife seems to think it's a joke ... hoping this T can show her just how serious this could get ... until I found "soon-kyu" I was just days away from "going home" as they say ... even now when I am feeling so much better I am always looking for options , for a painless guarenteed way ... I don't dwell on it like last last year but I also never completely forget about it either ...

Thanks to all my friends here ... and all the love you have shown me ... and bearing with my "obsessive" ways ...

I will get there ... Tigger .
Kudos to you! I too am doing this since I started seeing my T back in December. She was recommended by my pdoc based off her knowing me and who could handle my dx. I don't think it's a bad thing if she think you need more intensive therapy with someone else. I would rather someone tell me upfront than to get several months down the road and they and I find out that they can't handle it. Hang in there!
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  #13  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 07:22 PM
wiretwister's Avatar
wiretwister wiretwister is offline
we are one
 
Member Since: Jul 2013
Location: Ky , USA
Posts: 3,015
Quote:
Originally Posted by BeyondtheRainbow View Post
I don't know what to say here; it would be much easier to be private but instead I'll talk around it. I had to be honest with you. If I weren't that would not be a healthy relationship. I don't think you need to shut down totally and honestly since it is me you have a problem with block me and let yourself have other friends. I didn't see this reaction coming and I'm sorry it did but not giving it a chance to talk it out or whatever doesn't really help anyone. I am not sorry for what I said because it was true and it was necessary to say something because of things too personal to me to post on here but I am sorry it upset you. I tried very hard to avoid that. I don't know what else to say; I'm a PM away if you want to talk it out.

It's not you hun ... this has been coming for months ... I just no longer seem to get it ... I offer too much , expect too much and just really don't know what to say anymore ... I no longer feel I should converse with anyone privately ... if I say the wrong thing openly someone can call my hand, hopefully before anyone is hurt ... I wish I could just blame my bp but I am really afraid it is the old grey matter breaking down with age ... no med can fix that ...
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( PRAY FOR SOUTH KOREA )



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  #14  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 08:53 PM
ComfortablyNumb5's Avatar
ComfortablyNumb5 ComfortablyNumb5 is offline
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Member Since: Sep 2015
Location: Michigan
Posts: 3,504
Quote:
Originally Posted by wiretwister View Post
I am writing this here , but I may make a post later about it ... it seems I am saying the wrong thing in my pm's ... not trying to but it seems I am ... so I have decided to unfriend everyone on my page ... I mean no offence to anyone .. I have always wanted to be helpful .. and it appears I am not doing a very good job of it ... so I am just going to stop sending and reading all pm's ... please do not pm ... I am sorry but you will not receive any futher pm's from me ... bye .. Tigger.

Hey! You're very helpful here! Please please PM me okay. I tried to PM you but couldn't.

Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Thanks for this!
wiretwister
  #15  
Old Mar 11, 2016, 09:21 PM
Anonymous37883
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Honest post-

Advice- stop sending flirtatious messages to women.
Reply
Views: 1050

attentionThis is an old thread. You probably should not post your reply to it, as the original poster is unlikely to see it.




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