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#1
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I am making a new start with my new T , I need to change many things in my life … many have already occurred , many need to …
I have abused others trust through my pm's … it appears I know longer “get it” … I seem to be out of step with others … I seem to not understand what others are expressing … I really wish it was my bp but I fear it is my facalities going to pot … meds can help bp symptoms but dying grey matter is a whole different kettle of fish … anyway I just want to apologize to anyone I have offened in the past , and I will try my best to do better in the future … but I feel I should no longer converse with anyone thru pm … I have also withdrawn my friendships … please do not be offended I just need to withdraw somewhat to get a better grip on myself … I do not have any issues with anyone ,anywhere , I just need to reevaluate how I am treating others … and I no longer feel I should do that privately … so my pm is turned off and will stay off until I am well enough to no longer hurt others … it seems I am always saying I am sorry over and over here … not really sure what is going on with me … please be patient … all I have ever wanted to do is be helpful … this will be a weekend all alone … not really sure how that is going to go in my frame of mind … but soon-kyu has got me thru it before and I just hope there is some magic left there … I just want a dream like she sings about in her song below ... Tigger ... Last edited by wiretwister; Mar 11, 2016 at 09:35 PM. |
![]() Anonymous45023, Anonymous48850, bipolar angel, gina_re, Nammu, raspberrytorte
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#2
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Best of wishes to you and I hope you will find the right meds and the right T to help you get back on the up and up. Don't worry about blocking PMs and taking some "radio silence" time to focus on yourself and your healing process.
__________________
--Keegan BP1 Substance Use Disorder -- Alcohol (In Recovery) 900mg Lithium 15mg Temazepam PRN "Just Because You're Paranoid Doesn't Mean They're Not After You"
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![]() cakeladie
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![]() Imah
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#3
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Just know you are not alone. Sending positive vibes and hugs your way
__________________
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#4
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Hugs!!
Sent from my XT1058 using Tapatalk
__________________
Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
#5
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Sending positive vibes to you. (Sent)
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__________________
Nammu Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. ... Desiderata Max Ehrmann |
#6
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Quote:
((Hugs)) I still consider you my friend. Promise me that when you are ready, that you'll shoot a PM my way. You're a great member here and we all love you! Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
#7
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Just keep taking it one step at a time and keep talking to your therapist. It can get better and you've taken a lot of positive steps lately it appears.
__________________
Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
#8
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(Fuzzybear ...
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#9
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( Gina re ...
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![]() gina_re
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#10
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(Ripose .. one of my oldest and best friends .... I pray you find your (soon-kyu) and fill your
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#11
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(Jacky8807 ... what can I say ..
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#12
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4:00 am ... Soon-kyu . save me ... please !
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#13
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if a window is shattered can it ever be repaired , it must be replaced with something new , but if the frame it rests upon is not straight and true it will shatter again ... and again ...
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#14
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I may have reached that point where reality shatters those long held beliefs , those thoughts of being ok , of being strong enough , smart enough , tough enough ... time for a new reality ... of accepting , of being led , of surrendering control ... knowing you no longer know best , or even right and reality from wrong and fanstasy ... the willing surrendering of my will ... I do not know where this path will lead but I am now on it ... I only hope the way is well marked and thorn free , for I fear it is not ... to trust another with your soul ... to give up you ... to lose what you are .. have been .. and will become ... can someone who see's you as a folder on shelf , or a 3 month appointment date really know your destiny ... we shall see ... I have not done so good a job on my own .. can it really be any worst ... we shall see ... can they save me ... we shall see ... bye old Tigger ... hello ***** cat ... have given up material things .. locked them away .. forever gone .. part of my idenity died with that ... when I lock away my will . padlock my soul ... will it die too .... ?
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#15
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(((((((wire)))))))
Sent from my LGLS990 using Tapatalk |
#16
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Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up manic high And the dreams that you dreamed of Once in a sleepless night Somewhere over the rainbow Blue souls try And the dreams that you dreamed of Dreams really don't come true Someday I'll wish upon a star Wake up where the darkness is far behind me Where trouble melts like lamictal drops High above the ip ward That's where you'll find me Oh, somewhere over the rainbow manic's fly And the dream that you dare to, Oh why, oh why can't I? And I think to myself What a wonderful world it's not Who wants to go over the rainbow anyway ... |
![]() Nammu
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#17
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Quote:
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#18
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Quote:
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#19
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sorry for the last post but I am hurting really bad ... and I no longer have pm to reach out with ...
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#20
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I cried all last night till soon-kyu allowed me to sleep , tonight seems to be starting the same ....
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#21
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mine are working too good ... I am that weird place where all I want to do is cry ... but those damn pills won't even let me think of how to make it stop ... I am not down just so full of tears I feel like I will burst ...
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#22
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soon-kyu , because I have dreams ........ I deserve dreams ...... I want a dream .....
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#23
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(((((((((Wiretwister))))))))
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#24
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Those that mind don't matter and those that matter don't mind.
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__________________
BEST OF LUCK TO US ALL! ![]() 600 mg Trileptal (oxcarbazepine) 30 mg Atarax (hydroxyzine) 8 mg Trilafon (perphenazine) Bipolar 1 - Borderline Personality Disorder - Generalized Anxiety Disorder - Eating Disorder |
![]() wiretwister
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#25
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Ty ... so very kind ...
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