On an upswing

I feel so much better than I did this weekend! It sucks to be in bed. My mother popped up at my house today and it wasn't clean. She didn't ask questions. I thought that I would be very straightforward with her.
She doesn't see a need for me to be in treatment, take medication, or ever have a bad day. In her eyes, all of my problems stem from my life changes after my divorce.

Right now, I am wide awake. I keep telling myself that I need to turn off my computer and settle down to go to bed. I don't see myself settling down anytime soon.

I am so proud of myself for today. I had a productive day and took care of my basic needs. I even attended an event at my son's school.

I know I probably should be concerned about all of the mood changes. I seem to be all over the map. My chart looks like a scatterplot. I still think though that I should wait this out a little longer to see if the symptoms settle down. I'm not sure what my doctor would say if I called him but I have a feeling that it would be to take my meds.

I have an appointment with my T next week. I'm not sure that I want to go in and see her. She might be mean when she finds out that I changed my Lamictal dosage. I don't really want to talk to her.

Maybe I will turn off the lights now and try some progressive muscle relaxation.

My case manager reminded me that I have two options. I can either be med compliant or use my coping strategies to manage myself. I will go with the coping strategies. We will see how it goes.

See t. There so pose to be non judgmental. See if t is willing to work on coping skills with you. Best of luck.