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#1
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Which do you prefer, manic or depressed and why? I'm going to say that as much as I hate it... I rather go through a depression because when I'm manic I tend to make major life decisions that I very much regret when I come down or years later. Like when I was 18 and stayed up for days just sitting in my room "doing stuff". I came up with the great idea of going to cosmetology school. Now in my defense I've been doing hair since I was 14 but even though it was fitting, it took me forever to finish and I didn't even end up taking the state exam and never touched hair again. $9,000 of my own money blown! And sad thing is I did it again with medical assistance school. I kept up with that and got a few jobs at Drs offices but now I still owe my student loans and again, I skipped on the state exam lol. I'm a flake. And there's those many other times I've made questionable decisions when hypo/manic and woke up feeling like the biggest idiot the next day. But at least with depression I don't even get out of bed enough to get in trouble!
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![]() Anonymous37971, BipolaRNurse, Crazy Hitch, OctobersBlackRose, whoamihere, xRavenx
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#2
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I get some funky hallucinations when I'm manic (both auditory and visual, but usually visual). Though, I'm mostly euphoric with some irritability mixed in, and I don't tend to do a lot of crazy sh#t in general. Just psychosis for me. I'm fortunate.
Like, I'm coming down from a manic episode right now and I "only" spent $1000 this past weekend. I also happened put all of that money on an American Express card that I impulsively singed up for. lol. (Well, $1000 is nothing to sneeze at, but compared to other people, $1000 isn't much!) So my manias don't do *too* much damage. ![]() My depressions are comparatively much worse. Every time I'm depressed, I get sui ideation. No exceptions. It's either severe depression or no depression at all. I *hate* that feeling more than I hate my hypo/mania regrets. |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#3
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As much as I hate the after effects of mania, I prefer the feeling of being way up than way down. I do not want to glorify my manias, but sometimes I cannot help but grieve certain aspects of them when I no longer feel that way. Example: I miss my confidence, excitement over so many ideas, the euphoric high....
As far as mixed episodes though, I'd choose to be "low" with regular depression than mixed mania any day, although they are both terrible. |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#4
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I've typed a long answer and deleted it three or four times now. In a nutshell, if the manic episode did not have periods of terror, then I'd pick mania. Years ago mania was a blast, and I had the time of my life, it's not as much fun now. Depression sucks too. Hmm, I have no right answer to this for me. I better quit before this answer gets to be half a page too.
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#5
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Honestly, hypo all the way man, I have been depressed for the past 6 months ( it was absolute hell, worse depression of my entire life, suicidal ideation, terrible personal hygiene, I barely moved from my bed once a month for doctors appointments,) stopped taking my meds cause I was so frustrated, had a horredous mixed episode, started my meds again and was like a reset button and now I'm hypo af. I'm riding the wave for as long as I can, until I crash and burn. Already spent R1000 half of which was shipping since I live in the middle of nowhere and I haven't slept in 3 days but at least I'm not stuck in my bed 24/7
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#6
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I'd have to say hypo would be my best and mixed would be my worst! All the way. If I had to specify. When I'm mixed I get dysphoric to a point where I have to lock myself in my room because I become a monster.
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![]() 1278, OctobersBlackRose
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![]() 1278, OctobersBlackRose
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#7
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I have to agree, mixed is definitely the worst out of the three by a mile, rather be stuck in bed than on a rampage throwing plates and tumblers, screaming bloody murder, wanting to jump out of my skin, sucidal ideation and racing thoughts all at the same time.
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#8
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My severe mania's gotten me in way worse trouble than my severest depression. Lost jobs etc because of it. *sigh*
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#9
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My full blown manias have lead to trouble. But my deep dark depressions are he'll. Idk. Neither. Luckily I don't have either anymore...
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#10
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i'd say i prefer the depression
at least i'm not ****ing up my life (oh wait, it all ready is ****ed), but you know what i mean- i tend to regret a hell of a lot of stuff during mania, and most of that can't be put right depression is horrible, but it's better in a way |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#11
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I'd rather be depressed. I've never destroyed my life while depressed.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
![]() OctobersBlackRose, whoamihere
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![]() OctobersBlackRose, whoamihere
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#12
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I would say depression, though not by much. Both are pretty horrible.
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#13
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Neither. Each one screws me over in some shape or form..
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#14
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I'm with you, they both suck. Though if I had to pick, I'd pick the up times; hypo. At least then my life doesn't 100% go to sh.it, only partially.
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Meds: Latuda, Lamictal XR, Vyvanse, Seroquel, Klonopin Supplements: Monster Energy replacement. ![]() |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#15
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Depression because at least I don't put my family through hell when I am depressed. I don't shame myself and do embarrassing things when depressed. I don't like depression but will take it over mania any day.
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![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#16
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I'd rather be up than down. I've lost too many jobs to count when I've been depressed and just... stopped going to work. I don't get severe mania, I don't have credit cards so there's a limit to how much money I can spend ( struggling to keep a job I don't manage to have much in savings), and I'd rather be up all night painting than in bed for weeks.
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Dx Bipolar II Rx Depakote XR 500 mg AM & PM Celexa 20 mg AM Wellbutrin XR 450 mg AM |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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#17
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I don't know
Nothing beats that euphoria though lol
__________________
I used to rule the world Seas would rise when I gave the word Now in the morning, I sleep alone Sweep the streets I used to own I used to roll the dice Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes Listen as the crowd would sing Now the old king is dead! Long live the king! One minute I held the key Next the walls were closed on me And I discovered that my castles stand Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand |
![]() OctobersBlackRose
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![]() 1278, OctobersBlackRose
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#18
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Idk they both suck for me, but if I had to pick one I'd say the very beginning of a hypomanic episode because it starts out euphoric. It's when it turns dysphoric that things get bad, I'm starting to think I was in dysphoric manic episodes 4yrs ago (before my two last year and this year) when I changed majors at college (had a major freak out at my Moms house), and again when I dropped out of school altogether, was delusional the second time. That's where I stand
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Wir sind was wir sind English We are what we are MDD w/psychotic features, BPD |
#19
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Same here. I don't know which is worse, frankly---the mania that makes me say and do things I never would under normal circumstances, or the depression that makes me want to die. They both suck. I'm very fortunate that I haven't had a bad episode of either type in two years.
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DX: Bipolar 1 Anxiety Tardive dyskinesia Mild cognitive impairment RX: Celexa 20 mg Gabapentin 1200 mg Geodon 40 mg AM, 60 mg PM Klonopin 0.5 mg PRN Lamictal 500 mg Levothyroxine 125 mcg (rx'd for depression) Trazodone 150 mg Zyprexa 7.5 mg Please come visit me @ http://bpnurse.com |
#20
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Severe mania vs severe depression? I'd rather be in a severe depression. I'm less likely to die, get hospitalized, or go to jail.
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#21
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Neither is good. I just get hypomanic and can't stop talking and doing things. It's scary, but I think the low-low is worse because I wouldn't be able to do anything or enjoy anything and I might do myself in.
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#22
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Definitely hypo... it's gotten me into PLENTY of trouble (making huge regrettable life decisions, spending too much money, etc.) but at least I feel good while it's happening. Also my house is always clean.
When I'm depressed, I get into a lot more trouble because I can't get out of bed to go to class, go to work, etc. so I start failing and I lose my job (or I quit). That combined with the horrible horrible feeling of being constantly suicidal, hopeless, worthless, stupid, the world's biggest failure, etc. makes depression way worse for me.
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stay afraid, but do it anyway. |
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