[OrmL]

Hello, I am new here and have a few questions. I will try to keep it short and sweet. I am 30 years old and I got diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis 3 years ago. Since then my emotions/moods/etc. have just gotten worse and has intensified than what they were in the past. My mood swings are not new to me and I have always had a difficult time with depression, holding jobs, having romantic relationships, etc.

With that being said, I had a major melt down in April and was about to admit myself until my mom had a stroke about a day later. Since then I have been seeing a psychologist and working with my doctors to try to sort my moods out. I am also on a lot of medication and MS can cause mood disturbances as well, so it is extra difficult to figure out if my moods are from the MS or something else.

About a month ago my psychologist suggested that I get on Lamotrigine, I just increased the dose to 100mg and am not sure it is working. I have also gotten off an antidepressant. Anyways the thought of having bipolar is really scary, especially coupled with having Multiple Sclerosis. My doctors have not yet said that it is for sure bipolar, just a possibility at this point. However, the more I read and the more I tell my psychologist, the more it sounds like it.

How could I live a semi normal life and all of the sudden not even be able to work and I had to withdraw from school? Although, I am going to try to tackle school this term. My life is so twisted right now and it is very confusing. Is this how bipolar works? I feel like I have had it my whole life or maybe cyclothymia and it turned into full blown bipolar.

There are so many things I want to say and ask, but right now I am most upset over my romantic relationships. I have never had a normal one. I can attract men, but I cannot keep them. I always freak out, and for no reason. It is like I am stopping it before it starts. I just did this, probably my worst freak out towards a man in a really long time. I just looked crazy. I wish I had a better understanding of all this a week ago, I might have been able to understand that it wasn't me at the time. This one hurts the worst because I truly did care about him and he is a good guy. I can't seem to get past a few months with someone before I go nuts. It is like I am two different people. I am not really sure how to explain it and if someone understands this and can help me, that would be great!

I am up and I am down and up and then down. My depression seems to last longer and longer than in the past and no matter what I do or try I can't seem to get out of it. Also, since my breakdown I have lost a thousands of dollars on gambling, in the past I never gambled much. I just feel out of control and do not know how to make sense of all of this. Thank you all for reading. I really don't know what I am asking, but I needed to get this all out. Any advice or comments would be greatly appreciated! Thank you so much.

[Skeezyks]

Hello OrmL: I see this is your first post here on PC. So... welcome to PsychCentral… from the Skeezyks! I hope you find the time you spend here to be of benefit. I'm sorry you having to deal with so many struggles all at the same time. This must be very difficult for you & confusing as well. Hopefully being here on PC can be of some comfort & support.

PsychCentral is a great place to get information as well as support for mental health issues. There are many knowledgeable & caring members here. The more you post, & reply to other members’ posts, the more a part of the community you will become. Plus there are social groups you can join & chat rooms where you’ll be able to connect with other PC members in real time (once your first 5 posts have been reviewed & approved.) Lots of great stuff! So please keep posting!

[Bigmike727]

Hi, and welcome to PC . Many people with BP are able to live good lives with the illness under control, the right meds and therapy can really help out alot. I noticed that you said you're on Lamotrogine, that's Lamictal right? I have switched over from Depakote to Lamictal in the past weeks aswell. It works pretty good for me, except it causes me to get up a bit more in the nights even though I take it in the am (I take the extended release one so that may be why). Hope you find the community here at PC very helpful, we are all here to support one another!

[HALLIEBETH87]

My mom has had ms since 1997 and has pronounced mood swings and deep depressions she didn't have before. They mostly just treat her moods rather than label it.

Just work on feeling better and don't worry about a label!

Hello and welcome!
I am new here too and it is great to have others who can relate to your concerns.

I know about freaking out.
Keeping a schedule has always helped me.
Keep on posting!

[OrmL]

Originally Posted by HALLIEBETH87

My mom has had ms since 1997 and has pronounced mood swings and deep depressions she didn't have before. They mostly just treat her moods rather than label it.

Just work on feeling better and don't worry about a label!

Thank you for your reply as that does make me feel better to hear that. Most people I have talked to with MS have not had the mood/emotional issues like I do. Felt like I was going crazy and thinking I was just creating it in my head. You are also right about not worrying about the label. I guess I just want to know what the heck is going on with me. My whole life feels turned upside down and I'm not sure how to fix it. May I ask how your mom is fairing with her MS?

[OrmL]

Originally Posted by fuschiafever

Hello and welcome!
I am new here too and it is great to have others who can relate to your concerns.

I know about freaking out.
Keeping a schedule has always helped me.
Keep on posting!

Hello. It is nice to talk to people who understand! I try to keep a schedule and do a pretty good job and seems if I get thrown off one day it can just throw me off.

[OrmL]

Originally Posted by Bigmike727

Hi, and welcome to PC . Many people with BP are able to live good lives with the illness under control, the right meds and therapy can really help out alot. I noticed that you said you're on Lamotrogine, that's Lamictal right? I have switched over from Depakote to Lamictal in the past weeks aswell. It works pretty good for me, except it causes me to get up a bit more in the nights even though I take it in the am (I take the extended release one so that may be why). Hope you find the community here at PC very helpful, we are all here to support one another!

Thank you for your reply. I believe Lamotragine is the generic of Limictal. How long does it usually take for these meds to work. I started at 25 mg for two weeks, then 50 mg for 2 weeks and last Friday I just started on 100 mg. I have also heard that doctors should check certain levels, they have not done that with me yet. Thank you!

[Unrigged64072835]

Welcome to PC!

My husband has MS and atypical depression. He's on Wellbutrin now and it seems to work well for him. Like what was said before, though, just focus on relieving the symptoms and don't worry about the diagnosis. It took me going through a lot of ADs before my psychiatrist put me on Lamictal and my moods started leveling out.

[Bigmike727]

I started at 25mg for a week then 50mg then up to 100 now. I kinda had to rush my timetable as I was rapidly needing a substitute for the Depakote, I've had Depakote withdrawal symptoms a few times, and imo are even worse than benzo withdrawal. As for the check my doc told me to come back one time to do blood work, said that he just wanted to check that it wasn't affecting my kidneys, apparently some rare side effect can seriously damage the kidneys, but he said if everything came back clean I wouldn't need no more checks

[bioChE]

Originally Posted by OrmL

Thank you for your reply. I believe Lamotragine is the generic of Limictal. How long does it usually take for these meds to work. I started at 25 mg for two weeks, then 50 mg for 2 weeks and last Friday I just started on 100 mg. I have also heard that doctors should check certain levels, they have not done that with me yet. Thank you!

Lamictal levels can be checked with blood work, but usually it's pointless to do so. Unlike some other meds (eg. lithium and Depakote), there isn't a given therapeutic blood level range. The dose is titrated until it provides symptomatic relief.

[bizi]

Welcome!
You will probably have one more increase to 200mg for regular maintenance dose of lamictal. This can be raised to 400mg in divided doses if needed.
I took 200mg at night for 8 years just with in the past year have increased it to 300mg. So I still have wiggle room. I don't have any side effects just good stabilization, but I also take an anti psychotic as a mood stabilizer too.
take .5mg of klonipin for sleep, going to take some amino acids to see if I can sleep better. Start taking them tonight.
The thousands of dollars spent on gambling is a classic signal for mania especially out of the blue. Am sorry about your break ups. you may suffer with some co dependancy issues. talk with your therapist about this.
bizi

[Shadesofdark]

Welcome to PC. Its a great place to be with people that understand what you are going through. Good advice and sometimes just an ear when you need it from someone that can relate.

Lamictal is a drug that you have to go up on slowly. A lot of people here are on it and most wind up using 200mg to 400 mg. Give it a chance to build up and hopefully you will find it a good mood stabilizer as many of us have. For me it has been a great drug and I really notice the difference on it, it has helped me a lot.

Take it slow, and try to post, I am sorry you are not in the best place right now, but remember a lot of people here do all right with therapy and maybe the right drug combo. Both take time.

Really just wanted to welcome you, we are all here for you.