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#1
Jul 29, 2016, 06:06 PM
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I know this question will sound weird, but... do you actually enjoy being bipolar? I mean, we get depression and mixed episodes, but we also get the upswings! The upswings are addicting, albeit a bit destructive at times.
Do you think your upswings outweigh the downswings? What makes you think that way? I'm on the fence here... My upswings are pretty cool, but I don't like the hallucinations so much. I think I'm neutral on this. |
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#2
Jul 29, 2016, 06:27 PM
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I have intensely euphoric spiritual experiences, that are the most amazing things in the entire world.
So... I almost want to say the rest of the awfulness is worth it.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
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#3
Jul 29, 2016, 06:29 PM
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However, I don't enjoy being bipolar.
__________________
The darkest of nights is followed by the brightest of days. 😊 - anonymous The night belongs to you. 🌙- sleep token "What if I can't get up and stand tall, What if the diamond days are all gone, and Who will I be when the Empire falls? Wake up alone and I'll be forgotten." 😢 - sleep token |
 pirilin
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#4
Jul 29, 2016, 06:35 PM
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Nah. Not really.
__________________
]Roses are red. Violets are blue.[ Look for the positive in the negative. PIRILON. If lemons fall from the sky, make lemonade. Unknown. Nothing stronger than habit. Victor Hugo. You are the slave of what you say, and the master of what you keep. Unknown. |
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#5
Jul 29, 2016, 06:41 PM
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Well I guess I enjoy the bipolar label because it explains so much of my life. I enjoy the manic part of bipolar even though it usually gets me in trouble or even further ostracized than I already am but since I'm a hermit at heart I don't really care.
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| Row Jimmy
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#6
Jul 29, 2016, 07:21 PM
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I don't really enjoy it. I would rather not have the long bouts of depression. And my manias aren't anything to write home about.
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 Cocosurviving, notthisagain
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#7
Jul 29, 2016, 07:24 PM
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Even though I love me some hypomania, I do NOT enjoy having bipolar. The depressions are awful. Being on meds kinda sucks, even though I don't really have any side effects. And it's expensive, just like any other chronic medical condition. But it is what it is, and I wouldn't know life without it, so I don't worry about it too much.
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Of course it is happening inside your head. But why on earth should that mean that it is not real? -Albus Dumbledore That’s life. If nothing else, that is life. It’s real. Sometimes it f—-ing hurts. But it’s sort of all we have. -Garden State |
| Row Jimmy
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#8
Jul 29, 2016, 07:42 PM
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No. If I had euphoric manias I might think otherwise but all that I get is dysphoric or depressed and neither of those is fun at all. I have had a few times of brief euphoria and I can see that it would be tempting but not for the day or two that it lasts every 5 years or so for me. One bonus to having grouchy bipolar I guess.
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Bipolar 1, PTSD, GAD, OCD. Clozapine 250 mg, Emsam 12 mg/day patch, topamax 25 mg, ,Gabapentin 1600 mg & 100-2 PRN,. 2.5 mg clonazepam., 75 mg Seroquel and 12.5 mg PRNx2 daily |
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#9
Jul 29, 2016, 07:52 PM
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Nope, I don't get a bunch of 'stable' time. Gets old.
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dx: Bipolar II - Rapid Cycling |
| Sad Mermaid
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#10
Jul 29, 2016, 08:01 PM
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Definitely not. My episodes are mostly mixed and they are frequent. It is an awful state of being to exist in and I have nearly killed myself several times. Bouts of hypomania, while great, don't make it worth it.
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Bipolar 1 with psychotic features PTSD  "Phew! For a minute there I lost myself." 'Karma Police' by Radiohead |
| Row Jimmy, Sad Mermaid
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#11
Jul 29, 2016, 08:37 PM
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Whatever I am, ....I enjoy it sometimes and sometimes I just want to die.
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| Sad Mermaid
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| jacky8807, JustJace2u
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#12
Jul 29, 2016, 08:48 PM
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No! It sucks! I no longer get hypo, now that I'm medicated. I just feel blah...
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#13
Jul 29, 2016, 08:59 PM
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Of course not! I would like to be MI free.
Tucson
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Dx: Bipolar I, ADD, GAD. Rx: Fluoxetine, Buproprion, Olanzapine, Lamictal, and Strattera. |
| Sad Mermaid
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| notthisagain
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#14
Jul 29, 2016, 09:02 PM
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I am on the high end of bipolar. I rarely get depressed. Sit on the fence most times not knowing when the shoe will fall off.
This MI explains at least to me....why I behave the way that I behave. So I guess I like being bipolar because I like myself. bizi
__________________
lamictal 2x a day haldol 2x a day cogentin 2x a day klonipin , 1mg at night, fish oil coq10 multi vit,, vit c, at noon, tumeric, caffeine Remeron at night, zyprexa, requip2-4mg |
| Sad Mermaid, Secretum
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#15
Jul 29, 2016, 09:27 PM
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Having bipolar or being bipolar? I have it and I'm fine with. But I am not a disorder, rather, I am a person with a disorder.
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| beigeish, Gabyunbound
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#16
Jul 29, 2016, 09:27 PM
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That's an interesting question. I'm not sure how to answer since I don't think I know anything other than "bipolar". I've probably been bipolar for 30 years and I can't remember anything more than hyper drive. I know what I was like before diagnosis and treatment and I don't want to go back there. Sure, I was a lot of positive things - productive, successful, energetic - but I was a Major League asshole as well.
But what is "normal"? I'm not sure. I like where I am now.....I'm unique and being BP2 gives me a sense of purpose. Now, I'm *focused*. My diagnosis lets me be comfortable in my own skin if I allow myself just to "be" and to work on improving as a human being. Being BP gives me humility, something I NEVER had. Beforehand, I was just a spinning tornado with no horizon. |
| bizi
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| Sad Mermaid
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#17
Jul 29, 2016, 09:29 PM
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No I hate it. I'm bp2 so I get mostly depression. Crippling depression. Like, I haven't showered in days depression. I don't get hypo unless it's substance induced and that feels good but gets me in trouble. I also get mixed a lot... Which is pure hell for me and my family. I hate my BP.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk |
| Sad Mermaid, Secretum
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#18
Jul 29, 2016, 10:37 PM
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Nope don't enjoy it would rather not have it.
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#19
Jul 29, 2016, 10:45 PM
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Big fat F no.....wtf, no with a capital F....sorry, not having a good night
Sent from my SAMSUNG-SM-G930A using Tapatalk
__________________
Current Meds Lamictal 200 mg x2 Seroquel 100 mg |
| Anonymous59125, Sad Mermaid
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#20
Jul 30, 2016, 12:07 AM
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I don't enjoy the depressive side. Only having been diagnosed in May I'm not sure if I've had anything other than the depression and a semi stable mood here and there.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
__________________
Dx: BP2 and MDD Current meds: 100mg Wellbutrin; 200mg Lamictal; 400mg Seroquel at night; Xanax 1mg/PRN; 100mg/PRN Trazodone at night for insomnia Diagnosed in May 2016 |
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#21
Jul 30, 2016, 01:37 AM
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No. I had to give up my law career and I'm permanently disabled.
However, I did meet a wonderful man. Changed my life in great ways. Can't describe it, even. I finally feel accepted, supportive and loved. 
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| Sad Mermaid, Secretum
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| Secretum
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#22
Jul 30, 2016, 05:37 AM
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i wouldn't say that i enjoy it, no.
but, what i would say is that i'll be lost without it (maybe that sounds weird) but i've had it for so long, and learnt to live this life... it would feel somehow wrong if i didn't have it |
| gina_re
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| Sad Mermaid
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#23
Jul 30, 2016, 06:06 AM
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Absolutely not! I hate it. I hate everything about it. My depression is brutal and life threatening. While my normal is flat. My manic state is agitation that turns into rage and bad decisions. It's never been euphoria. In fact I don't think I've ever experienced euphoria in my life...at least not without the help of drugs...the kind that aren't prescribed to me.
Last edited by whoamihere; Jul 30, 2016 at 06:10 AM. Reason: Edited for spelling |
| Sad Mermaid
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#24
Jul 30, 2016, 06:43 AM
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This is a silly question, and maybe a little disrespectful to all those who struggle with bipolar disorder.
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| notthisagain, whoamihere
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#25
Jul 30, 2016, 06:48 AM
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I try to enjoy being who I am.... the spirituality I have experienced make a lot of being bipolar worth it, but I think I'd trade the whole thing for an even keel of emotion ... say, a 5 on the 1-10 scale. I spent years depressed and that wasn't worth the upswings. I think, however, that I was overmedicated and that's why I was depressed.
Having said all that, I wouldn't have the joy I have in my life if I hadn't had the sadness, so I'd leave things alone, as they are. If that's being happy with bipolar, sign me up. |
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