Not everything is a symptom of BP

Really: why care if you can't do anything about it? The preoccupation only makes it more debilitating.

And even if the meds are used to experiment, I thing they'd help. It makes everything a bit less meaningful, less important. Not ideal, but I agree you are delusional.

And I couldn't care less if it wouldn't be a problem for you. You're always welcome here as far as I'm concerned.

It makes me feel a lot less isolated. I really mean that.

I have accepted this experimentation for long enough. The problem is they are much bigger than I. Our whole universe is just a test tube. It's not that they are big, more that we are small. Weak. They control others and make them do things to me. They haven't gotten to everyone but I know whose been recruited. I don't know if these people know they are being controlled. I like to think they do not.

Why am I delusional? This is my reality. Just because a lot of people disagree does not mean they are right. How does anyone know for sure this is not happening and that I should be drugged? Ya know, I've conceded to fall in line and concede to the opinion of the masses. What choice do I have? Do I have any control at all? Will they be satisfied if I take the pills or will they laugh when they cause me unimaginable side effects?

Illness and wellness were the actual words used. They are both nouns.
Explanation and excuse are not the same thing.
Excuse or Explanation: Is There a Difference? | Sorting Out Your Life

(underlining mine, and the is sole portion to which I refer.)
Interesting irony.

Though BP plays out differently in different people's lives, it still retains parameters. Parameters are at the very heart of what gives words meaning. After all, consider the very definition of definition: "the act of defining, or of making something definite, distinct, or clear". A definition separates it from what it is not. This is not to say others don't need help. But it is a disservice to all involved to pretend something is part of bipolar that isn't. (Such as my liking purple.)

If it is questioned: Who are we to decide? It begs the question: Who is she to decide?

I like you, I do. But I'm not in a good place and having a pretty irritable day to boot, so things are bothering me that otherwise might not. I'll probably regret writing this, but it's been churning in my head for hours now and really bothering me.

I'm going to be unsubscribing from the thread, as it's not doing good things for my head.

I don't wish you ill, but well. But illness has nothing to do with it, wellness does.

I had a long talk and cry with my hubby last night ....things became clear then confusing then clear and I decided to stay away from the BP section as well as this thread. Now I feel the need to write this and hope I am clear and this comes out how I mean it to.

I've been battling PTSD issues for weeks now which a few of you are aware of and some may have read my posts talking about the gang attacks I've been subjected to. I've been very TRIGGERED and just came down from a manic episode. When I read this post I (probably mistakenly) thought the post was directed at 2 specific members on this board. I have seen this happen before....people start a thread about a member to criticize them and many jump on board. Back when I was attacked, many strangers sat back and watched while I was beaten and did and said nothing. That is what I could never understand and so when I see people being attacked, I cannot help but say something. When I responded, I felt my reply was benign but it was quoted and some following posts by other members (saying I was bragging and other things) made me feel the post was an attack on me too....so then I was defending myself also. I ran this post across a few sane people who I can trust. They tell me when I read something wrong often because they don't want me to come across as a fool. Well apparently, they got it wrong and so did I.

I am sorry to Moreta and anyone else I offended. I'm not making excuses but I am hoping people can understand that I was coming from a good place. I might have gotten this ALL wrong and I apologize if that is the case. If I hurt someone, I'm sorry....I was very hurt and I don't wish to hurt others but it seems I really did and that eats my insides.

I may leave PC for awhile until I see things clearly or my family thinks it's OK. My mother and husband think PC is harming me....but without it I'm stuck in my head entertaining deadly thought. I don't want to leave but I don't want to get worse or make others worse. I will try to do better and see how it goes.

I'm open to constructive criticism and welcome it. I don't always see myself clearly and like when someone with good intentions tries to help.

At my old job, when someone did something wrong the boss would call a meeting and all the people would gripe and moan about what was done. The one person the meeting was directed at and who did the small thing would just feel like dying. These meeting were gang up sessions. My boss should have called the person in the office and addressed the issue directly....but she was weak and enjoyed making people squirm I think. That is what I felt was happening and I'm sorry my delusional thought pattern ruined your thread Moreta.

(((((( ElsaMars ))))))

Peace, Love, Comfort, Joy

I had no idea all of this was going on for you.
I had not perceived your ruining anything. Still don't.
Please do whatever helps you to heal. Would miss you, of course!
You add so much love, support and understanding to the community.
Your own well-being is most important.

With Admiration, Love and Gratitude,
WC

----response. Wow, thanks all of you for the funniest most right on posts ever. I can really identify with the sometimes its my job to be an asshole, like the proverbial its a dirty job but somebody has to do it. Sometimes somebody has to say the tough things to say, as long as it doesnt work against you eventually.

-----response. Hey lady, you are one of my favorite people on this board, but really not everything we do is from bp. Sometimes i do less than wise things because im lonely or bored or frustrated. Every year at this time im one of many who are frustrated by looking around and expecting my family to be like the waltons tv show and i freak because they are so far from it. But i had some good luck as well as bad this year. Thanks all of you for being there. I feel so much less alone and learn so much here. Hugs to,one of my favorite people!

You are too sweet. Actually I agree with everything you are saying here. I misinterpreted things due to my own issues. But my issues are said to be BP and PTSD related. I think it's just PTSD. I thought I mentioned that before Maybe not, I'm never sure. I tried to make that clear. I do stupid stuff all the time that isn't BP related. And I don't recall ever blaming something non BP related on BP. *scratches head*. I could be wrong though. I just meant that I meet people where they are at and try to be accepting......even of assholes .