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Old Feb 15, 2017, 03:44 PM
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Nickiskip Nickiskip is offline
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Can you feel manic inside but still have control? What I feel like doing is drinking having sex getting high and driving as far as I can as fast as I can.

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  #2  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 04:54 PM
rwwff rwwff is offline
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As long as I'm in a very low stress environment, quiet, no people, just occasional phone calls, focus on things I can do and try myself its ok-ish; add people and interaction to the mix and I'm right at the breaking point of uncontrollably stupid action. Any possibility of normal work or conversation is completely out of the question. This has only worked out because I work alone and my family is not very insistent on my participation as long as I'm working and providing. lol.

Now I got meds though... so time to peel back some defenses and see what happens.

nb... it is kinda hard to judge the scale of your own manic though... very hard.
  #3  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 09:46 PM
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franz kafka franz kafka is offline
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I think at early stages of hypomania, yes. At least for me, mania shows on the outside quite significantly. It's not subtle at all... people notice. But if I'm just hypomanic sometimes I can come across as normal.
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  #4  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 09:54 PM
rwwff rwwff is offline
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Originally Posted by franz kafka View Post
It's not subtle at all... people notice..
Yeah, that part definitely. Even if you think they don't. It kinda hurts a bit, when people you care about tell you that you made them feel unsafe afterwards. I really don't want to hear those words again.
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Old Feb 15, 2017, 10:29 PM
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xRavenx xRavenx is offline
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People on the outside who I am close to have worried about my decision making and lack of judgment while I'm manic. Sometimes, I will have some awareness that what I'm doing isn't that safe or good for me, but the mania prevents me from caring about that since I feel so euphoric or speedy. Every now and then during mania, usually when I'm about to crash (or feel mixed mania), I'll start to realize I am losing control. The only problem is, often nothing stops it, even if there is that awareness, until I crash.
  #6  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:16 PM
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nsynckiki2000 nsynckiki2000 is offline
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Originally Posted by Nickiskip View Post
Can you feel manic inside but still have control? What I feel like doing is drinking having sex getting high and driving as far as I can as fast as I can.


Girl me too , I'm actually drinking wine , husband went to work and seriously thinking about sex and I am feeling you because it feels like it's nothing you can do about it , and yes you can still be manic and out of control , it's a pattern and the thing that sucks is we do it and end up hurting our bodies but I don't care at this point , I know this did not help you but i want you to know I feel you
Thanks for this!
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  #7  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:21 PM
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MtnTime2896 MtnTime2896 is offline
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Originally Posted by rwwff View Post
Yeah, that part definitely. Even if you think they don't. It kinda hurts a bit, when people you care about tell you that you made them feel unsafe afterwards. I really don't want to hear those words again.
I feel that, so much right now.

I guess I scared the crap out of my friend the other day. It sucks.

As to the original question; I have to be alone and not have too much going on. Then I just stay in my room, write like crazy (I'm talking I write and compose full songs and finish the process with at least three of them) and I also end up blasting music and drinking. My fiance comes home and keeps me focused on other things until he convinces me to take some meds and then I'm knocked unconscious by them. I think I scare him sometimes, hell all of the time. Wish I didn't.
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  #8  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:23 PM
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Nickiskip Nickiskip is offline
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Originally Posted by nsynckiki2000 View Post
Girl me too , I'm actually drinking wine , husband went to work and seriously thinking about sex and I am feeling you because it feels like it's nothing you can do about it , and yes you can still be manic and out of control , it's a pattern and the thing that sucks is we do it and end up hurting our bodies but I don't care at this point , I know this did not help you but i want you to know I feel you
Funny thing is. I had a guy like really really try to sleep with me tonight and I told him no.... Even in the midst of being super horny. Now I just lay here like I don't see my go to guy until Saturday night and in the mean time I feel like I'm suffering slowly. Lol
  #9  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:28 PM
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Nickiskip Nickiskip is offline
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Originally Posted by Só leigheas View Post
I feel that, so much right now.

I guess I scared the crap out of my friend the other day. It sucks.

As to the original question; I have to be alone and not have too much going on. Then I just stay in my room, write like crazy (I'm talking I write and compose full songs and finish the process with at least three of them) and I also end up blasting music and drinking. My fiance comes home and keeps me focused on other things until he convinces me to take some meds and then I'm knocked unconscious by them. I think I scare him sometimes, hell all of the time. Wish I didn't.
I don't really have anyone to go to when I'm hypomanic like now. No one has txt me back and I need mental stimulation or real penetration. I don't think one guy understood what asking to come over at 10pm was supposed to be.
  #10  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:28 PM
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nsynckiki2000 nsynckiki2000 is offline
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Omg lol it's funny because I'm seeing this guy on Saturday , you said no , that's good lol but um I'm seeing this guy on Saturday, your bipolar stop thinking so hard , I would say don't do it but I'm bipolar too lmao so um .. if you like this guy then why not , your going to keep thinking about it until you do it lol , don't do it ok u will feel bad , me I'm doing it Saturday because I want to and uh I have to have someone else , if I understood why I would tell you but I can't seem to figure it out plus I'm drinking wine sexting this guy and man is he cute IMG_1627.jpg the guy I. The left lol the taller one lol
  #11  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:32 PM
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Nickiskip Nickiskip is offline
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That he is. The guy who tried to have sex with me tonight is also bp so I understand his urges since he's hypo right now. But I've been trying for months to put this guy nicely into the friend zone. He thinks he can be my joker. Problem with that is the obsession has to start with Harley. Lol I question if I'll ever be faithful in a relationship/marriage. I wasn't in my last marriage. 😕
  #12  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:35 PM
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nsynckiki2000 nsynckiki2000 is offline
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Originally Posted by Nickiskip View Post
That he is. The guy who tried to have sex with me tonight is also bp so I understand his urges since he's hypo right now. But I've been trying for months to put this guy nicely into the friend zone. He thinks he can be my joker. Problem with that is the obsession has to start with Harley. Lol I question if I'll ever be faithful in a relationship/marriage. I wasn't in my last marriage. Manic?


Uh your going to give in lol but I never been with a guy who was also bipolar that might get weird , try a guy who is not because he might get obsessive because he's a guy and bipolar, I just have flings .... find another person who is not bipolar and go from there lol such bad advice but it's what I'm thinking lol so uh lol
  #13  
Old Feb 15, 2017, 11:38 PM
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Nickiskip Nickiskip is offline
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Originally Posted by nsynckiki2000 View Post
Uh your going to give in lol but I never been with a guy who was also bipolar that might get weird , try a guy who is not because he might get obsessive because he's a guy and bipolar, I just have flings .... find another person who is not bipolar and go from there lol such bad advice but it's what I'm thinking lol so uh lol
Well I won't give in because he's not my type... His cousin on the other hand I've been trying to get at for years. He's lucky I don't know who his chick is. I might be vindictive enough to find a way to break them up. I mean he's already told me when he's single I'll be the first person he hits up.
  #14  
Old Feb 16, 2017, 12:14 PM
BastetsMuse BastetsMuse is offline
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Originally Posted by Nickiskip View Post
Can you feel manic inside but still have control? What I feel like doing is drinking having sex getting high and driving as far as I can as fast as I can.
Yes of course you can. Mania is in the brain, after all....if you can control the actions you take you're ahead of the game. I've been where you are, and it's tough but doable.
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