Want to go off meds

Hey, so I already know this is a bad idea!! but im doubting my diagnosis as BD.
I was hospitalized twice, 1st time for antidepressant-induced mania, then second time right after for major depression. Had symptoms of depression before and maybe hypomania but not sure.
My pdoc put me on lithium and it has been 1 month since, and I decided to quit it cold turkey for somedays to see my reaction. Maybe I don't need the drug. I know this is wrong and I know I should tell all this to my pdoc but I feel she won't understand and im also scared that i will disappoint my family after all we've been through these months (regarding my hospitalizations).
Has anybody ever got off lithium only a month after starting it? What should i expect? I am already on therapeutic dose.
Oh and i stopped it yesterday, so already missed 2 doses. And i have been feeling more "alive" without it.

well I had no physical symptoms going off it but there is a lot of studies/info that say about 4 months after stopping it ppl tend to have an episode they wouldn't even have had if they were never on the lithium. And I swear the fourth month hit and I went hypo to mixed.

I stopped a couple times to drink after being newly prescribed, because lithium and alc just don't mix.
I did not notice any change, aside from the neuroticism and lack of "Eh, whatever"

It is normal to question your dx but I would talk to your pdoc about it. They need to know that you choose not to take the medication.

I stopped Lithium after a small titration (I had been on it a few years). For about three months I was fine then I was hit with a series of bad mixed episodes. Lithium seems to calm me down, reduce impulsivity and wild mood swings...to a point. I doubt I will be going off it for a long time now after that experience. I certainly felt more 'alive' but my moods were more labile. It became dangerous.

But that is my experience as BP1. You do need to tell your pdoc. They can't make you take meds but they can weigh in on the effects and what might be best for you at this point. Be careful and watchful for any episodes.

I went off Lithium once and ended up in the hospital. My pdoc (prior to the one I have) thought it would be so simple. I wanted off because of weight gain so the doc prescribed me something else. It did not work. I was hospitalized twice in two months. After that I started back taking it. I was put on other meds but they just could not tame my mania and mix episodes like Lithium can.

I have never taken Lithum ... depakote and lamictal are my history ... but in general it took 3 -4 years to accept the dx ... been over 5 years and I was playing with my dose (just last week ) ... I have always had bad results on my own ... my advice would be give it more time ... and talk to your pdoc about changes you want to take .. good luck either way ... I know bper's just can not keep there hands off the pill bottles ... just the way we are .... Tigger .

hi. i can't blame you for wanting off lithium. it can be a lifesaver for classic bipolar I, but for a lot of people...its overkill.

im not going to tell you what to do, just sayin' that i understand where you're coming from. most psych meds numb the emotions to some extent. sometimes its not too bad, sometimes its a chemical straight jacket. lithium can also cause some physical adverse effects, especially over the long haul.

i hope you and a doctor can figure out something that gets the job done without taking too much away from your personality and life overall.

Sometimes I wish I didn't have to pause life to take my pills. I've requested my medical records from three hospitalizations and a previous pdoc....they all have bipolar on there. But mostly I'm scared of the side effects of going off the drugs considering how much I'm on and how long I've been on them. So I continue to fill my pill case every week..

It might take months to find out the answer to your question of wether or not you are bipolar. Best of luck

I would encourage you to get a second opinion of the DX. That way you can know for sure. I've relocated out of state and my DX was rechecked.

Thanks for the answer!!
thing is I have had 3 docs giving me the same dx... but i'm still not sure of it, I always think "they don't known me well enough".
I guess in the end I will be testing myself and the meds out until it goes wrong or i tire of it. I don't know why and i wish it wasn't like this but this feeling of wanting to be sure of the dx is pretty strong for me right now. And im also scared of taking these strong psych meds thinking that maybe i don't need them

It's normal to not want to accept that you have bipolar disorder after you've been diagnosed. I'd say that after 3 doctors have given you the same diagnosis, it's probably a pretty strong indicator that you most likely do have it. It's also normal to be scared or anxious about taking psych meds but when you're taking the right ones, they can really help.

A month isn't long enough to see if going on lithium helps and 2 days isn't enough to see a change from going off of it either.

You need to take a medication for 6-12 weeks before noticing an improvement. When I had a reduction it took about 2 months until I noticed the reaction to having done so.

Please, continue to take the medication until you have discussed this with your doctor. At the very least talk to your pharmacist. Thank you.

I can totally relate to the doubting and wanting to know for SURE. I have been diagnosed by at least 5 different doctors over the past 10 years and I still don't believe it half the time and thus am basically unmedicated (I also have health anxiety so I'll be damned if I'm going to take something with horrible side effects if I don't absolutely need it!).

That said, remember that bipolar is on a spectrum. I once read something that stated the question as: "it's not whether you're bipolar or not, but how bipolar you are" - e.g., where are you on a scale from classic unipolar depression all the way to depression with mania and psychosis. Somehow it's possible for me to accept that I am on the spectrum (and not at the far end of unipolar depression), yet I can't fully buy into the idea that I have BP. It's rather illogical, but it's as close as I can get at the moment.

(I highly recommend the website psycheducation dot org)

as far as medication, I am not the person to give any sort of words of wisdom whatsoever, but I can tell you that I relate and I think this is very common amongst people with BP